Subliminal Talk

Full Version: UPDATE JOURNAL (UMSv1 - MLS latest version)
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Hey everybody! I'm back! For some reason, every time I would log in, there would be some sort of vague technical problem. Now, it seems I am able to actually log in and post. Dunno what happened, but it was like that for the better part of a year! then I just got the intuitive notion I should check back in again and all of a sudden it works. Weird. 

Anyway, A LOT has happened since the last time I updated, and that was barely an update mostly done over the phone (I was able to log in on the phone, but not on any PC or Laptop for some weird reason) Because so much has happened, I figured it'd be best to just create a whole new journal for it then make one for MLS, which I switched to. 


So...  in regards to MLS, it made a lot of leeway clearing out emotional crap (though I'm still healing) and eventually I started executing. 

I started feeling motivated to do things that would make me money and started thinking up ideas. 

Then, at some point, my dad put a gun to my head over a petty political dispute. We were arguing about the quality of performance of a certain governor at the time regarding COVID measures, and my dad went way overboard and overreacted to essentially nothing. He got Baker-acted and temporarily had his friend take his guns away from him for safe keeping, and I had to move from Florida to Ogden, Utah to go live with my brother. We said it was for respite, but we pretty much had the idea of me becoming a resident and now it's official. 

Once I settled in, my social worker brother immediately started pushing for filing disability with the government and we also went hard on a shit-ton of dental procedures I badly needed (I still have a crown procedure coming up) My SSI/SSDI claims have been denied, but that's normal. We are currently  legally contesting this decision, but we need up-to-date psyche evals and time is of the essence. We cannot rely on state psyche evals because bureaucracy working the way it does, by the time we get the eval, will will have run out of time to contest the decision. So we will probably have to pay out of pocket for a private psyche evaluation. 

I'm getting in touch with the Vocational Rehabilitation services here in Utah for finding work, but at the same time, my brother warns against actually GETTING a job until AFTER I have been approved for SSI/SSDI benefits, or else they will use that against me. 

Apart from that, I have been working on two aspects for money: one is content creator stuff (Twitch, Youtube, etc) and the other is a plan I have for an Etsy store. 

The Twitch and Youtube stuff is what I've been working on, but I'm going to visit Florida for a month and I'm going to ask my dad to help me set up the Etsy store, which will sell online print-on-demand stuff, like stickers and posters and things. 

I already know of a company that will handle all the middleman work (creating any physical products that might need to be physically made before they could be sold, as well as storing them, shipping, contacting clients to let them know when their purchase is ready to be shipped and their orders received, etc.) in exchange for a cut of the profit, so it doesn't all have to be print-on-demand. I have some ideas for what kind of products to make that will be profitable and how to go about it, but I still would like my dad's help (gun-to-the head thing notwithstanding, and he IS doing better now, and watching less toxic media) in brainstorming and getting the website itself off the ground. He may be a boomer, but he has ALWAYS been the tech guy of the family. 


As for Twitch and Youtube and stuff, I've payed 60 dollars for some professional overlay, made my own screens, set everything up, have a studio/office/den (whatever you wanna call it) where I can do my broadcasting, with a Blue Yeti Mic and pop filter, a good computer, two moniters and a wall of acoustic foam, as well as artwork for decoration behind me. I have created a consistent  brand, aesthetic and theme, am making consistent content and have been working on all the stuff I need to make the content I want to make. I also have  a somewhat underpowered laptop with a second portable moniter I can hook up, and an Xbox controller I can calibrate to both computers, as well as games that I can stream or record Let's Plays of that are able to work on my underpowered laptop, in case for any reason, I cannot use my den, such as travel or my brother kicking me out of the den temporarily. 

I also want to get into making music and make that a part of my brand, but all things in due time. I will also, when I can, set up a system of tipping and a patreon account, as well as create some merch and a merch store, since I also know good middle-men to use for that stuff. 

I know that the content creation thing take a while to build up (could take years) so I want to focus more on the Etsy store once all the initial stuff I need to do for the broadcasting stuff is running smoothly (I'm almost there, and expect to be there by the time I get back from my trip) and will be able to better focus on the Etsy store once I'm in Florida and I'm getting help on that front. 

My brother is also trying to get me into NFT art, which seems lucrative, although it might be a bubble that is gonna burst at some point. Still, while the getting's good, I should TOTALLY make some NFT art to sell and maybe I could put that money into my other businesses to make more money. 

At some point though, because the content creation stuff is heavily gaming based, and I was getting routinely humiliated for my piss poor gaming skill at the games I play, I decided to give UMS a break and switched over to MLS so I could get better at the games I'm playing. 


for about half a year, I used MLS and barely practiced, yet people notice majour improvements and figured I had been practicing. I took a break from streaming to work on other stuff and deal with emotional issues I was having (healign trauma) and when I made my return, I told myself after an off-stream practice session with my friends that I wanted to officially make these games my thing that I am learning (I also bought MLS for learning guitar and other music stuff, as well as art stuff, which I haven't begun practicing yet, due to all the plates I'm spinning) and the very next day, I did my return-to-Twitch celebration stream and I emerged as a dangerously badass player! it was incredible! Iwas getting my ASS KICKEd the previous night, despite all the improvements I'd been making! And now, over the course of the last 5 days, I've been WWAAAAAYYYY better all of a sudden! it's like I just play the game I'm playing, go to sleep, play MLS in my sleep and then wake up the next day and it's like I processed the shit in my sleep and got way better! I have even begun DREAMING about the game! 

I still totally intend to also use this for music and art though. It seems that once you explicitly LABEL something a goal and declare it to yourself, the program begins working MUCH MORE Efficiently upon that specific learning goal. Probably should have done that from the start *duh* And now I feel more motivation to play and practice! This'll be GREAT to finally apply to guitar once I have all the music equipment and the other stuff going on! 

Once I'm through with my MLS runs, I want to do the Stop Masturbating subs, because I have been having real trouble with the NoFap thing and I view it as a critical component in my chakra work. Chi-related energy stuff. 

So after that, we'll see. But it seems the MLS is starting to REALLY work wonders (I even pulled off some insane technical stuff intuitively during a match a couple nights back. I had friends going "shit! Did you just buffer that move! Holy crap!" LOL) and it seems the UMS is STILL doing it's work, at least somewhat. 

Very interesting. 

Anyway, it's good to be able to log in and post again without having to do so on my phone. I DID NOT want to type all this stuff with my thumbs LOL 

It's also great to be back! 

That's my update, and I hope to see more great progress as things move forward.
Oh, and as for emotional healing, I'm still doing that, but have REALLY made progress through some EXTREMELY stubborn stuff. Though I have plenty more to go.

My teacher within a certain set of hobbies that I have told me that I have narcissistic predilections, but that unlike most, I am actively working to preempt them. That sounds about right. She also said that I have a laughable sense of entitlement and selfishness that will be very counterproductive along my chosen life path. Also accurate LOL

So I have plenty of work to do on myself, but at least I am clearing a LOT of bullshit, learning to forgive and let go of stuff (still working on the most stubborn stuff, but making serious progress) and am generally healing my C-PTSD that I seem to have.

Still, it would GREATLY benefit me to get Life Tune-Up 6, once I can afford it. All the more reason to go hard on my business ventures. I want to be free, live on my own, become financially independent and be my own boss in life! I'm sure Shannon's subs will help me get there!
Man, that's full on.. hope things work out for you.

Good to hear that MLS has helped you.
Thanks Ben!

I'm sure they will Smile
Update: I just realized something...

So, my computer was giving me the same "Subliminal-Talk.com can't process your login request" shit again today, then it occurred to me: hey, why not try a different browser? and BINGO! Google Chrome works, but for some reason, I can't login when I'm trying to on Microsoft Edge. Weird.
So... I am doing badly at those games I'm playing lately. That being said, I'm also feeling kinda low-key depressed lately. Hopefully, that's just a result of MLS working on whatever emotional issues/trauma is negatively affecting my learning speed.
So I have decided to stop using MLS. It has definitely helped me reach a point in .y gaming where I can hold my own pretty well against my friends and not get my ass kicked all the time, despite minimal practice. I did not notice any of the promised increase in motivation to learn and practice, bit I do feel I definitely got results.


I stopped because I reached the end of a 6 month cycle and I want to take a break, purchase LTU6, now that I finally have the money, and switch to that. I'm sure the healthy positive healing changes from LTU6 will ALSO have the added benefit of making me more pleasant and entertaining to watch on stream too, so I don't think that will suffer from the switch.

I REALLY NEED to go on LTU6.

There's a lot of healing and detoxing from faulty beliefs that I need to do. Besides, I am struggling with issues of forgiveness. LTU6 should really help with that.
(01-08-2022, 05:26 AM)EvolvingPhoenix Wrote: [ -> ]There's a lot of healing and detoxing from faulty beliefs that I need to do. Besides, I am struggling with issues of forgiveness. LTU6 should really help with that.

Welcome back!

You might want to consider the program Shannon is building now - "Universal Healing."  AFAIK, it's going to be a single-stager, with the latest tech.  You can find the latest comments and updates on this in the "Shannon's Journal" thread, and "Shannon's Journal Discussion " thread.
Thanks Ruffian. I'll look into that.


So...

Here's an update:

I just got $300 moved into my account, which had $327 in it, totalling to $627. I thought this would be enough because last time I had checked, LTU6 was $600. Guess I missed the boat on that one.

So now that I can it afford LTU6, I don't know what to get. I guess either UMSv2? I shall look into "Universal Healing" as well, if I can afford that.

I bummed I cannot afford LTU6. Very. I dunno. Maybe I should just save up and find a way to get up the money. But I dunno how I'll get up the cash quick enough. I'm constantly feeling like if I don't spend fast,y family will expect me to spend it all on something else and I'll be empty handed. I guess I'll just switch to a different sub. UMS could help me get up the money to be financially independent and to afford LTU6 I suppose. Maybe I should ask Shannon?

At any rate, thanks everyone, for your support.
Why not run OF first? Never a bad idea to work on your fears.
(01-09-2022, 02:17 PM)Johannesbrst Wrote: [ -> ]Why not run OF first? Never a bad idea to work on your fears.

Hmm... Maybe not a bad idea either. I'll ask Shannon what he thinks. 

I decided I'll either buy E5 or, now that you've mentioned it, maybe OF. Of course, I'll ask Shannon what he thinks so that I have a better informed idea what to do. Thanks for the advice!
Pick the sub you want, and then save up for it if you have to. When I was younger I would hide money from myself (and my family) by taking it out of my bank account as cash and hiding the physical cash. Then I saved up what I needed and bought what I needed to buy.

Pick what you really want most, and then get it.
(01-10-2022, 12:53 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Pick the sub you want, and then save up for it if you have to.  When I was younger I would hide money from myself (and my family) by taking it out of my bank account as cash and hiding the physical cash.  Then I saved up what I needed and bought what I needed to buy.

Pick what you really want most, and then get it.

Hmm... Hide it from my family? Not a bad idea LOL
So I've decided to wait a week for UH to come out, and then pay $240 for that! That's perfect!

I watched this video that popped up on my YouTube feed JUST NOW and it's really eye opening:

https://youtu.be/4LiWgnJZOr4

Everything in the video was spot on regarding my situation.

What's sad is I am in a position to continue experiencing narcissistic abuse, all while needing to heal from it!

IJ will help with the healing, bit HOW do I get away?!

I need more money to get my freedom!

One thing at a time. I must think of product ideas for my Etsy store so I can move forward with it.

I must begin making money, as fast as possible!

But I will focus on UH before focusing on UMS.