Stage 2, Day #44/365, 3rd Day ON,
My mind is actively trying to distract me from coding things. I have ZERO interest. Watching plenty of dumb videos while practicing guitar. At least improving that skill.
Stage 2, Day #46/365, 1st Day OFF
Stage 2, Day #53/365, 2nd Day ON,
Had to miss a few days of scheduled programming due to catching a cold; I used MIR for the majority of that time.
It was a bit rough for two nights, but the whole ordeal lasted about 72 hours. I'm not cleared to get back to work until I provide a negative COVID test.
Stage 3, Day #60/365, 3rd Day ON,
I learned two days ago that I have COVID. That was the cold I was talking about in the last message.
Been using the opportunity to sleep, practice tons of guitar, and kicking the can about affiliate marketing.
Making money is the only area where I experience resistance.
The start of stage 3 might have something to do with it.
I'm playing a few loops throughout the day, based on how long I'll be seated at my desk.
Note: was away for so long because I was unable to log in for several days
Feeling a pressure to succeed financially, combined with an inner impotence.
It's like I'm looking at a bench press with 3 plates, but knowing that it would crush my throat. At the same time, I'm not interested in starting small haha
Stage 3, Day #62/365, 1st Day OFF,
Last night, for the first time in my nearly 30 years of being alive, I chose to have sex from start to finish without a condom.
(She's a regular date, who isn't seeing anyone else, who's on the pill and most of the way through her period, AND I pulled out, so I figured why not)
Holy shit does it ever make a difference!
First off, all of this morning, my brain has been sex-obsessed, reminding me of my horny teenaged days; popping stiffies while at work and shit.
Second, the amount that I busted out at the end was absurd (my dick knew where it had been lol).
Third, a flood of emotions and good feelings towards my partner; my brain is convinced that it's in love. I'd even say that the entire dynamic of our relationship shifted after this happened. More intimate. Though I wouldn't want to build an entire relationship on top of "omg dat pussy's so good!"
I need to be careful because this has set a new standard for sex; however, I've had a history of looking down on people who get "oops" babies because "hurr durr it feels better without condoms." It's dangerous stuff and I consider myself disciplined, but all of my precautions, statistically speaking, lowers the risk to virtually zero.
I've considered a vasectomy to remove that concern completely, though I will probably want to have kids 10 years down the road.
Stage 3, Day #67/365, 2nd Day ON,
Making money independent of my job seems to be the furthest thing from my mind right now.
Stage 3, Day #69/365, 4th Day ON,
Still having that lack of desire to make money in the concrete way (of course I have desire in the abstract sense).
Been listening to about 4 loops per day; 2 during the evening, then 2 at night. Following my intuition about that.
Sometimes listening on days off, though I realize that this might be excessive.
Noticing that my confidence is at an all time low (which isn't *that* low right now).
However, I felt approach anxiety and missed an opportunity to chat with a woman at the grocery store.
I feel like a failure because I haven't taken any one of my skills to a very high level or been able to redirect my career despite trying very hard at both.
This too shall pass
Stage 3, Day #77/365, `1st Day OFF,
Still listening to the subliminal, even on some days off muahaha
Stage 3, Day #80/365, `1st Day ON,
Noticed how I am a pretty timid person in a variety of ways; keep to myself.
I'm not bothered by it; I get by with it. It's just that I'm not outgoing or putting myself out there.
Wish I were, though; it would help me thrust myself out into the world.
Then again, it is in a work setting, where I don't want to make waves, and want to keep stable in order to work on my side projects. Might be a covert success strategy.
Stage 3, Day #86/365, `3rd Day OFF,
Going to switch to Stage 4 by Thursday/Friday.
Feeling more confident.
Also, I've been working my way through an 8-course certificate program by Google, hosted on Coursera, for data analytics. Currently through most of the 6th course after 2 weeks; they estimate that you'll take 6 months to complete it, but that's a massive overestimation.
(01-31-2022, 01:48 PM)Ampersnd Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 3, Day #86/365, `3rd Day OFF,
Going to switch to Stage 4 by Thursday/Friday.
Feeling more confident.
Also, I've been working my way through an 8-course certificate program by Google, hosted on Coursera, for data analytics. Currently through most of the 6th course after 2 weeks; they estimate that you'll take 6 months to complete it, but that's a massive overestimation.
I'm interested in doing this course too. How are you finding it?
Looks like they've combined sql, tableau, excel into one course. Is it just a lot of pivot tables and presentation decks/slides?
(02-02-2022, 04:14 PM)Amann Wrote: [ -> ] (01-31-2022, 01:48 PM)Ampersnd Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 3, Day #86/365, `3rd Day OFF,
Going to switch to Stage 4 by Thursday/Friday.
Feeling more confident.
Also, I've been working my way through an 8-course certificate program by Google, hosted on Coursera, for data analytics. Currently through most of the 6th course after 2 weeks; they estimate that you'll take 6 months to complete it, but that's a massive overestimation.
I'm interested in doing this course too. How are you finding it?
Looks like they've combined sql, tableau, excel into one course. Is it just a lot of pivot tables and presentation decks/slides?
They've included the programming language R; it's not crazy complex but it's something I haven't seen before, and I've built websites from scratch as a full-stack developer student. Pivot tables are included but they spend maybe a few hours on that . Good course; I'm almost done with it.