Subliminal Talk

(09-05-2019, 05:39 AM)AlphaRomeo Wrote: [ -> ]Ok. I havent felt the need to do more than one loop, but that also means I have not done experiment if more would be good for me. Seems majority of users are doing more than one loop, including Shannon. Maybe one is good for me, its just seems to take time to get really going (about 2 months now). Lots of internal shifts, but not so much in the bank account or action department. I have tried different on/off cycles tho...still have not found the best for me. I may keep using 3days on, 7 days off , with one loop/on days as that was the original optimal usage according to models for majority of stubborn types, which I think I am regarding to subs.

Anyways, have a potato.

Thanks!  <throws into potato sack>

Actually, judging by how I was reacting to the loops today, I may be lowering their number a little bit from next week onward (it would seem 2 should work as well judging by how the 4 felt today).

I think Shannnon mentioned somewhere that he is now using two loops (with 1day on, 5days off). Now, of course what works for him may not work for you or me, but just thought to mention in case if more users starts to settle to that number it may be a good one for most...maybe. Lets see what kind of usage patterns emerge over time...

I remember in the beginning folks getting knocked down with just two loops but maybe now they/we have gotten used to it so it may be that the workable number of loops after that is >1. Maybe, lol.

I kinda got knocked down around the 3rd loop this time around, took a nap until the end of the 4th one, but got my butt up to do stuff anyway. The first two loops felt like I was executing them (it's pretty much what I follow. I can feel stuff happening physically when I'm executing - and the first two loops felt *really good*); I upped the number and settled on 4 as at the beginning of the previous month fewer loops would end up with me feeling either terribad or resiste-y, and I'd start getting execution-like sensations on loops 3-4. I'm only doing 3 days of break between looping loops as longer than that, while it indeed does facilitate execution, I believe (because I start getting the tell-tale sensations again) somehow tends to result in weakened auric shielding (again, based on what I'm experiencing physically/mentally).

There's a chance that the more H&C and other "removal of unnecessary stuff and resistance" modules get stuff done, the fewer loops may be required to get to execution.

Then again, the above may be bullshit as it's all based on my subjective experiences and gut-feelings, so your mileage may vary, obviously!

After today's rehearsal, I kinda felt energetically tired - more than I should have given that we simply farted through a relatively straightforward piece once, and it took about an hour or so. Otherwise, I'm feeling pretty fine, if a little bit drained. So I guess the shield's doing its job! Yippie! Now I'm feeling quite fine and optimistic despite the tiredness.

(There's this one smarmy little girl in the cast who's asking to get that stuff reflected onto her, though. I *will* use that DRS, probably together with a USLMaxx of some sort and see some heads roll, but first I want to see how the new version of DMSI that's in the works performs. Otherwise, I suppose I'd end up knocking out quite a number of my responders right now, perhaps even worse than knocking out, and I don't really want to do that, as I assume their only is sin is that they like me a little bit *too* much, lol, and in some cases may be a little bit unpracticed in not getting exactly what they want, exactly the way they want it. I can take this stuff and pretty much shrug it off, all things considered, as I've been coming to the conclusion that I'm indestructible, lol, and I know how to clear that stuff out and have tools and subs and everything. They probably wouldn't be able to shrug it off, and may be too stubborn/foolish to stop even when faced with backlash in some cases as well - doesn't mean it's not a terrible nuisance, though. We'll see soon enough.)

Gonna have to remember to get a little bit of an energy boost in the mornings before rehearsals and shows. A little bit of additional chi never hurt anybody.

Out of bad news, my older bro decided to get himself what's most probably arthritis, so he's in the hospital now getting the hospital works. We were worried a bit it might be something more, um... fatal, as the symptoms he has could be several things, but the immediately fatal stuff has been ruled out for now. So I'm gonna have to bring him some stuff over from his place to the hospital today.

Hmm, been feeling a little bit down these past couple of days. Nothing dangerous, just a little bit sad. I'm feeling some sort of blockage in the root region, maybe it's getting worked on and hence this.

[EDIT: Come to think of it, what I'm feeling like would be best described as "unenthusiastic"]

Anyroad, starting rehearsal proper on the morrow. It's been pretty pleasant up to now, but all this can soon change as the "moron squad" was not in attendance today and yesterday. Heck, maybe they'll sit this one out, make my life easier.

My DMSI responders who are in this one are being very pleasant towards me, though, which is a nice change of pace, TBH.

Listening to some loops today, and then I think I'll take a break of 5 days. Something's telling me to try: 2x(?) - loops, 5x0. The (?) is because I don't know how many yet. I'll go either with 2 or way more, like 8? I dunno. Depends how much time I'll have on the weekends, really. I'll see what my gut tells me when I get to it.

Finishing up rehearsals tomorrow, then a week-long break, then it's back to touring, lawl.

The auric shielding in UMS is doing a very good job so far. I can sometimes still feel negativity that's being projected at me, but it's way lessened etc. The "moron squad" (just two people this time around, so not that many) was trying to make trouble, as usual, but I kicked their butts by just smirking at them knowingly and waited these bozos out to allow them to, proverbially, hang themselves, lol, which they did.

I kinda feel for one of my DMSI-responders that's in the project as well, as she appears to be suffering from a bit of a hate-raid due to the above mentioned "smarmy little girl's" envy towards her, but she's taking it in stride. I'm showing her some loving to balance it out as well, she appears to be appreciating it quite a bit. <3

Hot Lacanian action on Monday was very, very hot. Good stuff, and - to my surprise somewhat (though not all that much, TBH ) - I got accosted by psychoanalytic MILF guru after to chat some about the session which was very nice.

Out of good news, the learned doctors have finally figured out whatever the hell was going on with my brother's health (it turned out it's not arthritis, and they were a little bit stupefied). As it happens, he was in South Korea twice this years on business trips and caught some sort of bacterial infection which had the docs puzzled as it doesn't occur in Europe pretty much at all, and it did take its sweet time incubating, apparently. Anyroad, they now have him on antibiotics to combat the thing and he should be good to go in about a week.

Apart from that, getting some pretty weird dreams as far as I can remember them, but feelin' good. The vast majority of people at the place where I'm rehearsing at and touring for (in the spirit of full disclosure - REDACTED, HAR HAR HAR HAR. I'm putting waay too much personal details into these journals anyway ) seem to be showing me tons of props and respec!, as well as are appearing glad to see me back. Also went to purchase some new clothing yesterday, gonna go get some more tomorrow after work's end.

Also received communications from my little aristocrat, but I haven't read it yet, lol. I'll do it on Saturday. I'm busy, y'see (also, I'm an ass, hahaha. Nah, just a little teasing, let her sweat a bit). (Seems to be of a positive sort, though, judging from the first line I've seen in the messenger app without actually clicking the thing).

Today's "performance" (internal, for the "powers that be" before the tours commence) went pretty well. I really feel for that lovely responder of mine, as she's definitely getting hated on and actually suffered a sudden headache and started feeling faint shortly before we were about to begin, most probably due to stress induced by that "smarmy little girl's" slander and hatin', (I've never seen her like that and she said she's no history of such things happening), but she pulled through in the end. Good on her!

The "moron squad" ended up looking like total... well, morons. Nyah, nyah.

The auric shielding really did pull through for me, y'know! Neat!

Still, sooner or later, I *will* use that reflection shield, because crap like the above is outrageous.

Going to that premiere tomorrow. I think I'll listen to some UMS tonight, probably a relatively high number of loops (I'll do at least 4, as I used to these past several weeks, but I'll see how it feels and if more are going to feel like something "to do").

I actually fell asleep yesternight without putting any loops on, lol. No biggie, I'll just listen to them tonight and tomorrow night.

I did sleep for about 10 hours or so. I guess I needed the rest.

Pah, that msg from my little aristocrat was nothing to write home about and non-committal to anything in the slightest. Not responding to her until I get a clear answer, lol.

The premiere was kinda fun, pretty good musac too, but I'm disappointed that that director chick did not give me any credit anywhere for using my translation as the subtitles (I did give her permission to do so, but it's still a copyright violation. My authorship is mine under international law and my name should have been there somewhere). I feel somewhat dicked over, and there will be consequences, one way or another.

I also happend to run into a "friend" from way back when, who answered the call of the Oedipal Sonny back when I was using DMSI 3.1 and earlier, and entered a "relationship" with one of my responders after slandering my ass from here to eternity. Now it turned out she was fooling him all this time (obviously) and was slutting it out behind his back (obviously; that girl was also trying to hit on me yet again after she caught wind of the fact I'm up to something with my little aristocrat). Karma, neh? I did warn that moron at least twice whom he's dealing with here, lol. They never listen, those Oedipal Sonnies!

Also ran into some pretty decent people I've not seen in a while, which was nice.

Don't give permission if it makes you feel burnt when they do what you gave permission to do.

(09-14-2019, 06:47 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Don't give permission if it makes you feel burnt when they do what you gave permission to do.

Giving permission to use the translation as subtitles does not imply permission for it to be used without crediting the author (by which I mean: "Polish text by: Have at ye"). I actually assumed I would be given credit somewhere, in the program or on the prompter, as it's standard practice (because doing otherwise is, well, kinda, um, borderline illegal).

[EDIT: I guess it would be full blown illegal if someone else was credited for it, and in this situation I am willing to assume some sort of oversight or omission, but the director chick is not a newbie and should know better]

Unless you mean that other thing, where I realize it is so, but I still need somewhere to vent, you know? This feels like a good place to do so.

I see now. Well, in the future, just put it explicitly in your contract that it's required.

(09-15-2019, 07:04 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]I see now.  Well, in the future, just put it explicitly in your contract that it's required.

Yeah, I guess I'll just let the girl know to add the credit in the future, should they repeat the performances. I won't be kicking her right now as she's down because the thing is getting rather... negative reviews (so I highly doubt there's going to be more shows). And the popular reception at the premiere appeared to be... mixed as well, as far as I could tell from the feedback at the reception after.

Nothing negative about the Polish text, though!  I'm actually kinda satisfied how it turned out and worked with the music in places, as baroque Italian is... well... not my main area of specialization.

I noticed I was getting kinda whiny last night, and it may have been related to the fact that I did 6 loops of UMS later on. I now have a little bit of a headache even. I'm not quite certain yet whether it's too many, or too few loops, and whether it's a side-effect of resistance or of the program working. I do tend to get rather testy or  before a breakthrough. 4 loops appeared to work well, maybe I should have stuck to 4. I'll see about it tonight.

Sub-wise, I plan to stay on UMS until DMSI 3.3.2 is released and I probably won't be taking an extended break between the two. Two reasons: I like UMS, and three full months on it should pay dividends in the future and - I really, really like the auric shielding in this one and would rather maintain it continuously. I do believe I should brace myself for an increased need for sleep when the time comes, though.

Yup, strikes me more as a resistance headache. I'll try doing at least 6 loop tonight to check, and then 5x0.

[EDIT: why it strikes my as "resistance headache" - it feels like some sort of unconscious negativity brewing and going up to the surface. May be a fear, may just be some sort of general negativity. If I hit it hard and fast, it should go *poof*!]