mat422 alpha journal

[SantaRich]

Interesting, I never linked my anxiety with trauma. My father yelled a lot when I was a kid and he had serious anger management problems. He'd bottle up his frustrations until he got pissed off enough and then released it all at once. I never really know how much of an impact that has had on me or if it has affected me at all. I notice frequently throughout the day my shoulders are very tense and I have to consciously relax them. I'll look into some of this stuff further, thanks Ben.

Mat, your father was just like mine and your anxiety was much similar as well. I was doing Alpha Male back in September and had to stop because my anxiety got so bad. It was so bad that I couldn't go to school because of social anxiety. Part of me snapped and I had to go on meds in order to fix the problem. There are herbal treatments out there that you can find at a pharmacy without prescription that may help with your anxiety, including teas. I'm doing therapy right now and yes it does help, but I understand what you mean and I had to go on meds because I could not control it. You also have to realize Alpha Male is pushing you out of your comfort zone, you're bound to have to work through anxiety until the program is completely finished. Exercise, yoga, and other meditative activities are good. There are some good programs you can buy online like Attacking Depression & Anxiety which people swear by. Good luck, feel free to contact me anytime!

Did we all have the same dad? It is amazing how we usually hate our parents, or dislike certain things about them, yet we sometimes take on those traits, especially that we don't like. I think that is why I am.......apprehensive about relationships, my parents have been married for 30 some odd years, I would say five them happy, accumulated. And yet almost all my brothers and sisters kind of follow their example and have bad or negative relationships. Oh and my father says he has anger problems because he was exposed to agent orange, off the coast of nam.

I am glad you are doing better Ryan and have found something that works.

Two more days and I start alpha 11.