01-25-2011, 08:41 PM
1/25/11
Just felt like venting and getting a few things off my mind. Still working on stage 1 2010 of alpha male and I can't wait for 2011 stage 2. Been having a little doubt lately though, I'm worried that the subliminals won't be enough to pull me out this deep slump I've been in for a while. This subliminal is really my last resort, I've been through so much stuff that never helped me. More and more I just pinpoint how much anxiety holds me back and how stupid and irrational it tends to be, but I feel helpless against it sometimes. It wears me down to the point where I'm physically exhausted.
At this stage I don't even know what to do. I'm keeping myself sane with my hobby, but some days I can't do anything else except sit and watch tv. I know this will pass eventually, it always does, but while I'm here it feels like an eternity.
I've definitely noticed subtle changes from the subliminal. I speak my mind more often and I'm more indifferent. But the anxiety is kind of hard to measure. I'd like to think it went down, but it's hard to tell. My worst fear is that I'm hardwired like this and I will never get relief. I can only hope that my anxiety is a product of my subconscious mind and not necessarily the actual physical construction of my brain.
Just felt like venting and getting a few things off my mind. Still working on stage 1 2010 of alpha male and I can't wait for 2011 stage 2. Been having a little doubt lately though, I'm worried that the subliminals won't be enough to pull me out this deep slump I've been in for a while. This subliminal is really my last resort, I've been through so much stuff that never helped me. More and more I just pinpoint how much anxiety holds me back and how stupid and irrational it tends to be, but I feel helpless against it sometimes. It wears me down to the point where I'm physically exhausted.
At this stage I don't even know what to do. I'm keeping myself sane with my hobby, but some days I can't do anything else except sit and watch tv. I know this will pass eventually, it always does, but while I'm here it feels like an eternity.
I've definitely noticed subtle changes from the subliminal. I speak my mind more often and I'm more indifferent. But the anxiety is kind of hard to measure. I'd like to think it went down, but it's hard to tell. My worst fear is that I'm hardwired like this and I will never get relief. I can only hope that my anxiety is a product of my subconscious mind and not necessarily the actual physical construction of my brain.
