10-06-2015, 03:03 AM
(This post was last modified: 10-06-2015, 04:06 PM by DarthXedonias.)
Long time no see everyone. Anyway, decided to open a new thread for two reasons: (1) to somewhat keep myself accountable and make sure I keep with this sub until at least the 3 month period, and (2) I'm just plain bored honestly lol (Which will be furthered explained later). As some of you might have read my EPRHA journey was pretty eventful. Came to some realizations and cleared out a lot of garbage out of my head. Wasn't able to get rid of my PTSD because I found out that its actually a physical problem with wiring inside my mind. The episodes though not gone have lessened and combined with some Vapping they are pretty rare now and not as explosive.
I'm currently on day 21 of LTU 3.1. Defintely noticing a lot of changes even this early:
- Social Anxiety is pretty much non-existent (kind of built on top of the work WM did in this area).
- I actually enjoy communicating with people. For some reason I like analyzing their facial expressions (which I find weird) and like seeing people enjoy themselves.
- If I'm not communicating with anyone I feel like I'm in this "still" zen like state most of the time.
- I've noticed myself acting more "subtly" dominate. For example, When talking to people I stare at them in the eyes but when they are talking to me I tend to pay attention to something else.
- My tolerance for stupid people is at a all time low. I recently got rehired at my old theater job and some days work with this one guy who was there the last time I worked there. Long story short hes a drug addict who totally F'ed up his mind to the point that he will stand their staring out in space while working sometimes. He pisses me off to no end and I totally despise working with him. The only reason he hasn't been fired, due to his low job performance, yet is because one of his cousins, who is one of the managers, has been able to protect him so far.
- I've also noticed that my co-workers (some old, some new) tried to do a lot of things to please me or try to get me involved in a lot of conversations.
- I'm even more positive in my attitude now and have plans for the future that I'm confidant I will be able to follow through on.
- It has reinforced the overcome guilt, shame, and fear programming I got from AM6 and EPRHA. Its at the point where if I notice anyone trying to use those things to control me I automatically see right through their attempt and get pissed off.
The most important change I've notice though is that this sub is making me a workaholic! Pretty much if I'm not doing anything productive i'm bored out of my mind. I'm currently on my 1st day off from working since restarting my job. Currently was bored all day. I've actually found myself wishing that I was already doing online classes so I could do some productive "work" in my spare time. If I try watching Netflix I get bored, If I try watching most movies I get bored, and also if I try playing any video games I get bored very easily with the exception of playing Dead or Alive last round(Granted, a lot of this stuff bored me since my first AM6 run but its gotten even more so on LTU). The only Hobby that doesn't lead to boredom in my spare time at the moment is reading. Reading doesn't usually last long though since I will go through like lets say a 50 chapter fan-fiction or book within 2 to 3 days. Still this is a welcome change over all because this will insure that I finish my B.S. Degree and Masters degree in the shortest time possible.
As for future sub use right now I'm planning running LTU til the 3 month period and then I will evaluate whether I want to extend it to 6 months. After this sub though I'm actually leaning towards taking another shot at WM again. This time though I will probably be using the refresher stage for like a year until I get the results that I want from it. I feel after doing EPHRA and LTU I should have enough stuff cleared out and taken care of so that I will have a more successful run from last time. I had thought about doing a AYP after LTU but my thinking is that if I can't even manifest "average" women with a magnet program how can I manifest a "perfect" women. It still might be possible but I rather take "baby steps" as it were.
I'm currently on day 21 of LTU 3.1. Defintely noticing a lot of changes even this early:
- Social Anxiety is pretty much non-existent (kind of built on top of the work WM did in this area).
- I actually enjoy communicating with people. For some reason I like analyzing their facial expressions (which I find weird) and like seeing people enjoy themselves.
- If I'm not communicating with anyone I feel like I'm in this "still" zen like state most of the time.
- I've noticed myself acting more "subtly" dominate. For example, When talking to people I stare at them in the eyes but when they are talking to me I tend to pay attention to something else.
- My tolerance for stupid people is at a all time low. I recently got rehired at my old theater job and some days work with this one guy who was there the last time I worked there. Long story short hes a drug addict who totally F'ed up his mind to the point that he will stand their staring out in space while working sometimes. He pisses me off to no end and I totally despise working with him. The only reason he hasn't been fired, due to his low job performance, yet is because one of his cousins, who is one of the managers, has been able to protect him so far.
- I've also noticed that my co-workers (some old, some new) tried to do a lot of things to please me or try to get me involved in a lot of conversations.
- I'm even more positive in my attitude now and have plans for the future that I'm confidant I will be able to follow through on.
- It has reinforced the overcome guilt, shame, and fear programming I got from AM6 and EPRHA. Its at the point where if I notice anyone trying to use those things to control me I automatically see right through their attempt and get pissed off.
The most important change I've notice though is that this sub is making me a workaholic! Pretty much if I'm not doing anything productive i'm bored out of my mind. I'm currently on my 1st day off from working since restarting my job. Currently was bored all day. I've actually found myself wishing that I was already doing online classes so I could do some productive "work" in my spare time. If I try watching Netflix I get bored, If I try watching most movies I get bored, and also if I try playing any video games I get bored very easily with the exception of playing Dead or Alive last round(Granted, a lot of this stuff bored me since my first AM6 run but its gotten even more so on LTU). The only Hobby that doesn't lead to boredom in my spare time at the moment is reading. Reading doesn't usually last long though since I will go through like lets say a 50 chapter fan-fiction or book within 2 to 3 days. Still this is a welcome change over all because this will insure that I finish my B.S. Degree and Masters degree in the shortest time possible.
As for future sub use right now I'm planning running LTU til the 3 month period and then I will evaluate whether I want to extend it to 6 months. After this sub though I'm actually leaning towards taking another shot at WM again. This time though I will probably be using the refresher stage for like a year until I get the results that I want from it. I feel after doing EPHRA and LTU I should have enough stuff cleared out and taken care of so that I will have a more successful run from last time. I had thought about doing a AYP after LTU but my thinking is that if I can't even manifest "average" women with a magnet program how can I manifest a "perfect" women. It still might be possible but I rather take "baby steps" as it were.
"I have no use of disciples. Let everyone be their own true follower" - Nietzsche