12-02-2019, 05:43 AM
Just to update. I'm using Self Esteem 5.5g and LFC.
I was getting chest pains running UMS, managing stress became very difficult so I started using tranquiliser which totally dismantled any motivation I had and cancelled out my hunger for financial success.
Suffice it to say I decided to can the whole thing. Every sub I do I still have the same niggling thought that ultimately Self Esteem and learning are what matter most to me. Even with UMS i'm still trying to buy freedom from the sense that I am 'less than'.
Shannon has lolled at this saying that SE is in most subs already implying there Is no real logic in wanting to go back to SE as a sub. Well my experience suggests otherwise. I've been back on SE for over 3 weeks and I haven't felt this good since I was last using SE. I'm more productive, centred, happier, mentally sharper. I'm actually enjoying life again and feeling more congruent. Compared to what I was feeling before which was mainly out of my own body, and being reactive.
I'm connecting again to my core values of what i'm about., and nothing I can think of could make me feel stronger.
I was getting chest pains running UMS, managing stress became very difficult so I started using tranquiliser which totally dismantled any motivation I had and cancelled out my hunger for financial success.
Suffice it to say I decided to can the whole thing. Every sub I do I still have the same niggling thought that ultimately Self Esteem and learning are what matter most to me. Even with UMS i'm still trying to buy freedom from the sense that I am 'less than'.
Shannon has lolled at this saying that SE is in most subs already implying there Is no real logic in wanting to go back to SE as a sub. Well my experience suggests otherwise. I've been back on SE for over 3 weeks and I haven't felt this good since I was last using SE. I'm more productive, centred, happier, mentally sharper. I'm actually enjoying life again and feeling more congruent. Compared to what I was feeling before which was mainly out of my own body, and being reactive.
I'm connecting again to my core values of what i'm about., and nothing I can think of could make me feel stronger.
Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
