The Modern Libertine's diary

[Cortez]

So far no odd dreams with the ASC and Happiness and Joy, though I can't wait to see how they affect my dreams. Every time I start a new 4g, at least for the first 3 or 4 days, they affect my dreams. I thought I was having a weird dream last night, but I woke up and it was just an earthquake, lmao.

[Shannon]

Just an earthquake. Kinda like, "Slightly pregnant"? or "Just a volcano"? lol

[Cortez]

Lol, it's not like it was a huge one, but it was enough to wake up me up, realize what it was and then promptly go back to sleep. Maybe I'm a little too jaded for my own good...

[Cortez]

Hmm, I must be resisting something in one of the subs because I've been blue lately and I haven't gone through one of those patches where I've been sad for a few days like that in quite some time. That's okay, whatever it is will be gone soon enough. I used to have a serious problem with depression, but that's been gone for the most part for a while. However, maybe there was something still in me that needed to be released. Anyway, I'm glad it's being brought to the surface whatever it may be. All part of the path to more Happiness and Joy, right?

Also, a note on ASC4G: I have been thinking a lot lately on where I want my life to go. What direction would make me feel the most fulfilled and action I can take right now to set my plans in motion. I looked up the script and this definitely correlates to one of the lines about only doing things that increase my self confidence. Like I said, the past couple of days I've been somewhat "off", but that has passed and now I'm feeling pretty optimistic about things. I know I'm moving in a good direction.

[Ryan]

Adam, when are you planning to do Alpha again? It's nice to see you're tackling these feelings. I know how rough that is. Good luck man!

[Shannon]

Hmm, I must be resisting something in one of the subs because I've been blue lately and I haven't gone through one of those patches where I've been sad for a few days like that in quite some time. That's okay, whatever it is will be gone soon enough. I used to have a serious problem with depression, but that's been gone for the most part for a while. However, maybe there was something still in me that needed to be released. Anyway, I'm glad it's being brought to the surface whatever it may be. All part of the path to more Happiness and Joy, right?

Also, a note on ASC4G: I have been thinking a lot lately on where I want my life to go. What direction would make me feel the most fulfilled and action I can take right now to set my plans in motion. I looked up the script and this definitely correlates to one of the lines about only doing things that increase my self confidence. Like I said, the past couple of days I've been somewhat "off", but that has passed and now I'm feeling pretty optimistic about things. I know I'm moving in a good direction.

Depression, even mind depression, can stem from feelings of hopelessness. Is there something you might see as being impossible to accomplish in the script, which might lead to that?

[Cortez]

Yeah, I have been going through a small amount of stress lately, Shannon. In deciding what I want to do with my life, stress at my job etc. I suppose that could be where the feeling of hopelessness might come from. I feel a little too complacent right now, but like I said, that is being lifted and I've been feeling a lot brighter lately. The feeling of despair that I felt in the past of "Man, I don't know how I can ever accomplish this." is being replaced with "These problems are much bigger in my head than they actually are." I've been doing a lot of growing up this past year and I am dedicated to being a solid man who is independent and completely emotionally healthy. Considering how screwed up I was just a few years back, I have made leaps and bounds. I am grateful for where I am at. Anything that seems difficult right now, I'll power through it.


Ryan- Thanks I'm fine, though. I'm going to do Alpha again in a few months. I think I'll do a month of ASC with Happiness and Joy and then another month of ASC with Anything is Possible.

[Shannon]

That's one of the things I love about the effect the Alpha set has had on me. I still have fears and anxieties, sometimes... but I see them for the anthills they are, now, and I just power through them because I know it needs to be done. Feels awesome, too.

[RainbowAbyss]

first off good luck Cortez!-I like how you put it-what seemed big and impossible in your mind-is becoming smaller and totally do-able-POWER THROUGH BRO!
And of course I have to ask do you find the effects of SM sticking through or possibly being augmented with the new subs?
I saw a sign today that said-Depression is an issue of chemistry not a character flaw-it was a fifty foot sigh on a building-just yellow background and black letters.

[Cortez]

first off good luck Cortez!-I like how you put it-what seemed big and impossible in your mind-is becoming smaller and totally do-able-POWER THROUGH BRO!
And of course I have to ask do you find the effects of SM sticking through or possibly being augmented with the new subs?
I saw a sign today that said-Depression is an issue of chemistry not a character flaw-it was a fifty foot sigh on a building-just yellow background and black letters.

I agree with the chemistry thing, but only to a very small degree. I feel that if you're healthy and eating a nutritionally balanced diet then your body should be making your neurotransmitters in a balanced and correct way. Your body is constantly trying to achieve homeostasis. You just have to give it what it needs to be able to do that. For instance, I have a natural dopamine boosting brain formula that I take in the morning. It consists of 1000mg Phenylalanine(The amino acid precursor to Dopamine in your brain), 1000mg Vitamin C(Your brain uses it to synthesize the Dopamine), and 50mg B6(A transporter for the other nutrients). I bought all of these in bulk on ebay, each ingredient by itself and I take it in the morning on an empty stomach. I just mix all of it in powder form with water and powdered powerade for flavoring. It works incredibly well! High Dopamine levels in the brain do all sorts of good stuff for you. I'm generally, happier, more focused, and more talkative when I take it. It just makes me better at whatever I'm doing. So that's something I did because I felt like I wasn't as focused as I could be. You can always help your brain chemistry out with natural supplements, I think.


As far as the Sex Magnet effects being augmented., I'm not sure. I haven't been all that sexual this past week or so that I've been on these new programs. Of course I've still got the lingering effects of women pursuing me and me being very flirty. I don't expect that to really ever go away, but I haven't been going out lately. I have one girl I've been seeing casually. I do remember that I tend to pursue a little bit more whenever I'm hitting the ASC really hard and I'm starting to feel that more and more every day, but I've put my sex maniac ways away for the time being. Lately I've been more interested in hardcore exercise and I'm making leaps and bounds with that, but that's really where my focus has been lately. I've been happier, though. ASC seems to do that to me for some reason, lol. Another thing that I have noticed is that lately women in their mid 20's have been really annoying to me. Not annoying like "Get the hell away from me" annoying, but more like "I could never date you." annoying. Younger women(18-21) and older women (27-35) seem much more attractive to me lately. They're just way more comfortable with themselves. There's something about the mid 20's that makes women super neurotic. They say that while men have a mid-life crisis, women have a quarter life crisis and I see the truth in that statement, lol.

Anyway, I've been feeling damn good lately.

[Ryan]

I honestly believe that too, Cortez. Younger women and older but not my age. And it's interesting when I put up a dating profile which shows me as an arrogant, honest, asshole who only is interested in hooking up, cougars come crawling like crazy! I love those types.

I like younger because they are more playful and adorable. And older because they are very open and mature.

Ryan

[woceyes]

Lol Ryan and I were just talking about dopamine levels. Do you need B12 as well?

i don't know much about vitamins but i was thinking of taking some. Ill try all the ones you stated in your post above. Thx Cortez.

[Cortez]

Ryan- I really do feel like girls in their mid 20's are constantly at war with themselves. It's something I'd rather avoid altogether. Those are some of the most dramatic relationships you can have. The girl I was seeing earlier this year was in her 30's(I never really asked her age and we saw each other for a while,lol) but she wasn't much older than me and that was the most drama free relationship I have ever had. Another observation I've had is that the sex is way better with the quiet mild mannered girls than the with the outwardly sexual girls. That's proven itself time and time again. There's no comparison. I now know the girls who are the wildest in the bedroom usually just by looking at them.


Woceyes- I don't really need B-12. I eat a lot of meat, but you'll find some version of the formula I mentioned in most brain boosting formulas that usually kind of pricey. However, the dosage that they have in theirs is usually way watered down, so you'd get way more value out of it if you just buy the isolated ingredients. I went for 500 gram containers of Phenylalanine and Vitamin C and then can buy some B6 capsules for cheap. That will last you practically forever, be a lot cheaper than buying any of the brain boosting supplements on the market AND will be 10x more powerful than any of them.

[WildFlower]

've had is that the sex is way better with the quiet mild mannered girls than the with the outwardly sexual girls.

You think? A nice improvement I've noticed form Sex Magnet is that I now see all women as being wild in the bedroom. Previously, whilst I could be attracted to a girl, her quiet, mild-mannered behavior was enough to convince me she wasn't sexual - and so I didn't do anything about it. However, I now see this fallacy for what it is, and women of all dispositions reveal themselves to me as being very sexual. Still, what makes you think the quieter ones are even more sexual?