10-16-2018, 06:22 AM
I had a dream last night. I was laying in my bed (in the dream) and my ex wife came to see me and she sat on my bed and she cuddled me, embraced me and I had the side of my head buried into her chest. She said to me xit's ok, I am back now, I missed you". I then started to cry as feeling of missing her came up.
When I think about how I felt in that dream and cuddling my ex wife etc (Which I felt being embraced by her again) I feel kinda sad when I think about it as I do empathize with that version of me in the dream.I do remember how it felt to be cuddled by her and it is coming up to over 3 years since I last saw her and 2 and half years since the divorce was final.
I listened to 7 loops of DMSI 3.1 B last night. I am guessing this kind of dream is from the A version.
None the less it was nice seeing her in my dreams last night
I was out and about and noticed a few women checking me out. A few hottties but they didn't jump my bones or anything.
I feel quite introverted, as in being extroverted and having the motivation to speak with these women is not really there, as if it feels like slot of effort. Don't get me wrong I would love to. Sometimes I wish allowed DMSI to help me more in that area (Even though that is not the goal).
Yesterday I went to to this little store and a men's clothing section up stairs. Very quiet, no one there. I bought a T - shirt and a hoody, there is only one girl working there sorting out the clothes. When I locked eyes with her to be served at the counter, she came over. She was very beautiful, no make up, natural, very tall (She must of been at least 5"11, as I am 6ft) she might of been 25/26 years old. I said alright to her and she folded my clothes etc and taking her time doing it and as she was I was just looking at her, admiring her and her body, I was thinking like damn she is wifey material. I never thought I would think that ever again! Lol. Anyway I didn't make conversation or anything and she was my kinda girl. When I finished we said our byes and as I started to turn she starting playing with the tips her hair, it's just something I noticed.
When I walked out and got into my car, at first I was just like wow, she was amazing...I couldn't believe how amazing she was. Then I thought yeah definitely she is my kind of girl, she is just the kind of girl I would like as a girlfriend. Then I started to realize I didn't even say anything or make any conversation, or even attempt to get her number. These feeling sucked, because all these I could of said this or that or that, but I didn't. Felt like a wasted opportunity. Then I calmed my thoughts my remembering there is plenty of girls out there, there will always be more girls I find attractive (Even though I felt this girl was ideal girlfriend wife material for me). Then I thought wouldn't it be amazing if I was able to actually act on all these opportunities, wouldn't that would be great?
Hopefully I will eventually allow DMSI to help me with actually acting on these opportunities in the newer versions. Because it sucks to not act on these opportunities! I don't want to wait for women to seduce me I want to be able to see this kinda girl and just go for it and get her number and meet up with her. What sucks even more is I think she would of said yes and would of been totally up for it, I really do feel that.
I look forward to the day when I am able to act on these opportunities with success.
When I think about how I felt in that dream and cuddling my ex wife etc (Which I felt being embraced by her again) I feel kinda sad when I think about it as I do empathize with that version of me in the dream.I do remember how it felt to be cuddled by her and it is coming up to over 3 years since I last saw her and 2 and half years since the divorce was final.
I listened to 7 loops of DMSI 3.1 B last night. I am guessing this kind of dream is from the A version.
None the less it was nice seeing her in my dreams last night
I was out and about and noticed a few women checking me out. A few hottties but they didn't jump my bones or anything.
I feel quite introverted, as in being extroverted and having the motivation to speak with these women is not really there, as if it feels like slot of effort. Don't get me wrong I would love to. Sometimes I wish allowed DMSI to help me more in that area (Even though that is not the goal).
Yesterday I went to to this little store and a men's clothing section up stairs. Very quiet, no one there. I bought a T - shirt and a hoody, there is only one girl working there sorting out the clothes. When I locked eyes with her to be served at the counter, she came over. She was very beautiful, no make up, natural, very tall (She must of been at least 5"11, as I am 6ft) she might of been 25/26 years old. I said alright to her and she folded my clothes etc and taking her time doing it and as she was I was just looking at her, admiring her and her body, I was thinking like damn she is wifey material. I never thought I would think that ever again! Lol. Anyway I didn't make conversation or anything and she was my kinda girl. When I finished we said our byes and as I started to turn she starting playing with the tips her hair, it's just something I noticed.
When I walked out and got into my car, at first I was just like wow, she was amazing...I couldn't believe how amazing she was. Then I thought yeah definitely she is my kind of girl, she is just the kind of girl I would like as a girlfriend. Then I started to realize I didn't even say anything or make any conversation, or even attempt to get her number. These feeling sucked, because all these I could of said this or that or that, but I didn't. Felt like a wasted opportunity. Then I calmed my thoughts my remembering there is plenty of girls out there, there will always be more girls I find attractive (Even though I felt this girl was ideal girlfriend wife material for me). Then I thought wouldn't it be amazing if I was able to actually act on all these opportunities, wouldn't that would be great?
Hopefully I will eventually allow DMSI to help me with actually acting on these opportunities in the newer versions. Because it sucks to not act on these opportunities! I don't want to wait for women to seduce me I want to be able to see this kinda girl and just go for it and get her number and meet up with her. What sucks even more is I think she would of said yes and would of been totally up for it, I really do feel that.
I look forward to the day when I am able to act on these opportunities with success.
