11-14-2017, 11:54 AM
Going through an intense inner morality odyssey atm. Back to square one in all areas of my life. Results and success I built up evaporated in the blink of an eye. Yet one thing remains: people and how they are responding to me.
My family is distrustful of me, people on the street stare at me.
Today I was waiting to turn left into a road. 3 cars were in that road already. When I looked over, the guy in the car directly in front of me was staring at me and wouldn't look away for a few seconds. Then he was looking at his phone. The car in front of him moved and it was his turn (4 way stop intersection) so I honked my horn. He didn't move or look up from his phone. So I honked again, longer this time. He moved. Then the car behind him took it's place and the woman in there was staring at me too. I smiled at her but she just blankly starred then looked away.
Wtf is going on?
I swear no one trusts me now that I'm trying my best to be a person worthy of trust. Why does that happen? And why did people trust me years ago when I didn't have any morality?
My family is distrustful of me, people on the street stare at me.
Today I was waiting to turn left into a road. 3 cars were in that road already. When I looked over, the guy in the car directly in front of me was staring at me and wouldn't look away for a few seconds. Then he was looking at his phone. The car in front of him moved and it was his turn (4 way stop intersection) so I honked my horn. He didn't move or look up from his phone. So I honked again, longer this time. He moved. Then the car behind him took it's place and the woman in there was staring at me too. I smiled at her but she just blankly starred then looked away.
Wtf is going on?
I swear no one trusts me now that I'm trying my best to be a person worthy of trust. Why does that happen? And why did people trust me years ago when I didn't have any morality?
