03-26-2011, 10:06 PM
More than halfway through stage 2.
I noticed something the other day at work. A couple of people were talking, as I was talking to them a few minutes earlier I asked them what they were talking about. Now they either ignored me or they couldn't hear me, which is possible, I don work in a factory kind of place. So after standing there for a second, I said screw it and walked back to my spot. I could kind of feel the, not neediness but, I suppose the un-alphaness I would have felt if I had stood there for another second.
Another thing,was something happened that I thought was extremely funny, and I laughed my ass off for almost the rest of the shift.
It definitely feels like it is getting easier for me to get in a good mood.
I stopped doing my exercises, the only reason was because I have been working alot more, or I like to think of it as a break.
It is hard to say what is changing or working as I am trying not to look, or to say this is different or that is different.
I dislike going to bars, but I, I need to do something different.
I don't know if it is the sub, but I am feeling different. I am a very introspective person, and it feels like that is not changing, but not staying the same.
For most of my life I have been that person who never fit in or was quiet and different. Because of that I have learned to be alone. Now for the most part that has caused me a great amount of pain. When I was in high school it was definitely the worst. I never thought I was a loser, but most other people probably did. I can understand the concept of what the writer of the Power of Now went through. I have had my little revelations and at one time I was starting to become the person I know I have the potential to be. Is hard to describe what I am feeling or experiencing. Could anyone else understand, anymore than I could understand someone else's life from a few written words?
I have always tried to understand the reason behind my own or others actions, and most of the time thought everyone else knew what they were doing more than I.
I did notice a difference in energy in the few days that I was doing my exercise.
I am still indifferent to most stuff. But I am feeling hopeful.
I noticed something the other day at work. A couple of people were talking, as I was talking to them a few minutes earlier I asked them what they were talking about. Now they either ignored me or they couldn't hear me, which is possible, I don work in a factory kind of place. So after standing there for a second, I said screw it and walked back to my spot. I could kind of feel the, not neediness but, I suppose the un-alphaness I would have felt if I had stood there for another second.
Another thing,was something happened that I thought was extremely funny, and I laughed my ass off for almost the rest of the shift.
It definitely feels like it is getting easier for me to get in a good mood.
I stopped doing my exercises, the only reason was because I have been working alot more, or I like to think of it as a break.
It is hard to say what is changing or working as I am trying not to look, or to say this is different or that is different.
I dislike going to bars, but I, I need to do something different.
I don't know if it is the sub, but I am feeling different. I am a very introspective person, and it feels like that is not changing, but not staying the same.
For most of my life I have been that person who never fit in or was quiet and different. Because of that I have learned to be alone. Now for the most part that has caused me a great amount of pain. When I was in high school it was definitely the worst. I never thought I was a loser, but most other people probably did. I can understand the concept of what the writer of the Power of Now went through. I have had my little revelations and at one time I was starting to become the person I know I have the potential to be. Is hard to describe what I am feeling or experiencing. Could anyone else understand, anymore than I could understand someone else's life from a few written words?
I have always tried to understand the reason behind my own or others actions, and most of the time thought everyone else knew what they were doing more than I.
I did notice a difference in energy in the few days that I was doing my exercise.
I am still indifferent to most stuff. But I am feeling hopeful.
"Personality is the extent to which the individual has learned to convert his energies into habits or actions which successfully influence other people.
-Henry C. Link
"I see you have the ring Lonestar, and your Schwartz is as big as mine."
- Dark Helmet
-Henry C. Link
"I see you have the ring Lonestar, and your Schwartz is as big as mine."
- Dark Helmet
