08-05-2021, 04:57 PM
Day 81
I've been dealing with some inner demons lately. It has been rough at times, but I seem to be mostly in the clear. I woke up early today and worked out. I also figured out my meal plan so I can get myself back on track fitness-wise. I've been doing some half-ass exercises for a couple of weeks, but it's time to set and stick to a planned routine. That way I can hold myself accountable. Oddly enough, I feel motivated but not fanatical. As I've noted elsewhere in this journal, I've habitually oscillated back and forth from one extreme to the other throughout my life. Now, I'll do it with a healthier mentality. I don't have some unrealistic/unsustainable ideal in my mind, so that helps.
Today I read a post about UMSv2 that intrigued me. I've been considering the use of UMSv2 as my next sub for a while now. The thing is, it's not something that I was ever interested in prior to running the OF-series (mainly v3). I suppose that OFv3 has cleared enough fear from my path that I recognize the UMS goals as a real possibility, where before I was blind to it. Why the blindness? Because I'm satisfied with my income. Because I love my work schedule. Because until recently, I haven't been able to entertain the possibility of doing any better. That's about it. Why am I reconsidering? Because I don't enjoy my work. Because I would love to have multiple income streams. Because I'm interested in exploring possibilities that I hadn't considered. Because I would love to be my own boss doing something that I love to do and something that I do well. Because the possibilities could very well be endless once the shackles are removed. Because frankly, I want those shackles removed regardless of the outcome.
Today, I closed my eyes and allowed myself to ponder what I would do if I had lots of money. At first it was difficult. Finally, I got into it. I felt joy and I felt freedom.
OFv3 is doing a fine job at dissolving the mental prison I've built. Instead of constantly looking at those dull gray walls, I'm beginning to get a glimpse at what's off in the distance. It still has quite a bit of work to do, though. OFv3 isn't done with me yet.
I've been dealing with some inner demons lately. It has been rough at times, but I seem to be mostly in the clear. I woke up early today and worked out. I also figured out my meal plan so I can get myself back on track fitness-wise. I've been doing some half-ass exercises for a couple of weeks, but it's time to set and stick to a planned routine. That way I can hold myself accountable. Oddly enough, I feel motivated but not fanatical. As I've noted elsewhere in this journal, I've habitually oscillated back and forth from one extreme to the other throughout my life. Now, I'll do it with a healthier mentality. I don't have some unrealistic/unsustainable ideal in my mind, so that helps.
Today I read a post about UMSv2 that intrigued me. I've been considering the use of UMSv2 as my next sub for a while now. The thing is, it's not something that I was ever interested in prior to running the OF-series (mainly v3). I suppose that OFv3 has cleared enough fear from my path that I recognize the UMS goals as a real possibility, where before I was blind to it. Why the blindness? Because I'm satisfied with my income. Because I love my work schedule. Because until recently, I haven't been able to entertain the possibility of doing any better. That's about it. Why am I reconsidering? Because I don't enjoy my work. Because I would love to have multiple income streams. Because I'm interested in exploring possibilities that I hadn't considered. Because I would love to be my own boss doing something that I love to do and something that I do well. Because the possibilities could very well be endless once the shackles are removed. Because frankly, I want those shackles removed regardless of the outcome.
Today, I closed my eyes and allowed myself to ponder what I would do if I had lots of money. At first it was difficult. Finally, I got into it. I felt joy and I felt freedom.
OFv3 is doing a fine job at dissolving the mental prison I've built. Instead of constantly looking at those dull gray walls, I'm beginning to get a glimpse at what's off in the distance. It still has quite a bit of work to do, though. OFv3 isn't done with me yet.
