LTU: Moving forward

[mat422]

I'll post this because I ended up looping it last night. I did wake up tired, but I think that's more due to something that occured while I was falling asleep. Last night it was like I was internally screaming in my head, not out of fear but anger. This fear, even though it is attached to a younger part of myself, was still perceived as some evil entity outside myself. I think it's because among both parts of myself it's hard to conceptualize fear. It's this largely imaginary thing that can and will stomp all over your life if it grows out of control. We know who experiences fear, but we don't know what fear is. I guess at it's core it is a survival thing and it's linked to death in some way. Even so, when it feels that irrational it's almost like my mind has to form some type of symbolic representation of it so I have something tangible to work with. Otherwise it's like it slips through my fingers as I try to clear it.

I'm starting to think these new breakthroughs are from LTU6. As great as LTU5 has been, it feels very different in it's execution right now. Not sure if that's due to my own growth or not.