In this for the healing DMSI v3.1 A

[mat422]

So I started my new job. Interestingly enough it brought up a lot of stuff to clear. Basically none of this feels real to me. I feel like I just lucked my way into this position and they're going to find out I'm not as experienced and fire me. I'm working on turning those thoughts around. Even if it was luck, I'm grateful to have an opportunity like this.

Also at this job there's a ton of people who's names I have to learn/interact with. My biggest issue throughout my life is a lot of the time people think I'm a jerk/aloof. When really I just deal with anxiety and have trouble with new people.

I'm not saying DMSI hasn't helped me out so far, but this is a real slap in the face. Coming so far and then just feeling like I'm back at square one when I'm confronted with these new situations. I'd say a good indication of change is how you react to familiar situations no?

Just kind of tired of dealing with all this shit. Man, I don't even care about getting women or being sexually attractive. Just give me a life where I can do a job with no anxiety, get paid, then do what I really want on the side. I don't understand why this whole thing has to be so damn difficult for me and everyone else pulls it off effortlessly.