10-13-2019, 06:20 AM
Day 11
I now feel that I have been on some kind of high since my last listening to UMS. There have been many things like travelling then the incident which happened last week due to which I was emotionally involved in many things. Now when at home I think of it, I realize that I am still high emotionally.
I have been working / doing things which I have been procrastinating for some time. Most of these things relate to money related stuff. e.g my shoe was slightly torn and I was using it for some time and delaying for some time. Today I got it repaired. Then I went to buy some stuff and ended up buying more toiletries than I normally would buy in one go.
I think that there is some form of resistance to the sub in terms of monetary stuff. I am thinking of improving my life in every area, spending money to make myself comfortable. But in terms of money I am not doing anything to improve my earnings / financial position. I am thinking of various things which I could do to improve but it is only in terms of thinking, no concrete action. I have also not been giving my business due time or proper action which it requires. I am in sort of a suspension right at the moment and thinking whether I should focus on the same business or start to do something else e.g start a new business or invest more time and money in my business. I somehow feel that maybe I am feeling that since I am listening to UMS, I will push a magic button and results will appear. I am also questioning my existing business / ventures whether to proceed with them or not. It always seems easy to start something new with fresh motivation and fresh push.
I had a dream last night. I was in a war and dropped by parachute into enemy area. I dropped somewhere in the city and am alone. I am somewhere in a area which is lower than the ground level. I am trying to find my way and then one civilian guy alerted the enemy army. A guy with a big gun mounted on something turns and fires at me. I get hit by a series of bullets in my lower abdomen and I die. There was no pain or anything and the moment I get the feeling I die, the next moment I wake up. It was 4:15 am.
I now feel that I have been on some kind of high since my last listening to UMS. There have been many things like travelling then the incident which happened last week due to which I was emotionally involved in many things. Now when at home I think of it, I realize that I am still high emotionally.
I have been working / doing things which I have been procrastinating for some time. Most of these things relate to money related stuff. e.g my shoe was slightly torn and I was using it for some time and delaying for some time. Today I got it repaired. Then I went to buy some stuff and ended up buying more toiletries than I normally would buy in one go.
I think that there is some form of resistance to the sub in terms of monetary stuff. I am thinking of improving my life in every area, spending money to make myself comfortable. But in terms of money I am not doing anything to improve my earnings / financial position. I am thinking of various things which I could do to improve but it is only in terms of thinking, no concrete action. I have also not been giving my business due time or proper action which it requires. I am in sort of a suspension right at the moment and thinking whether I should focus on the same business or start to do something else e.g start a new business or invest more time and money in my business. I somehow feel that maybe I am feeling that since I am listening to UMS, I will push a magic button and results will appear. I am also questioning my existing business / ventures whether to proceed with them or not. It always seems easy to start something new with fresh motivation and fresh push.
I had a dream last night. I was in a war and dropped by parachute into enemy area. I dropped somewhere in the city and am alone. I am somewhere in a area which is lower than the ground level. I am trying to find my way and then one civilian guy alerted the enemy army. A guy with a big gun mounted on something turns and fires at me. I get hit by a series of bullets in my lower abdomen and I die. There was no pain or anything and the moment I get the feeling I die, the next moment I wake up. It was 4:15 am.
E1 182 days: E2 127 days: USLM3 317 days: UMS 210 days...
