12-14-2013, 03:49 AM
Day 24
Life definitely seems to be improving though I wouldn't want to tempt fate. I'm mostly in a happier state, I'm beating myself up about things less and less, in fact not at all. I went to a shrink the other day who said I have adhd and put me on meds, I haven't taken them yet.
The last few days though I've been having some disturbing dreams, dreams where really horrible things happen and I find myself having to deal with them - then I wake up thinking "fuck, I'm so relieved that was just a dream".
This morning for instance I awoke from a dream where if lost all my teeth and looked like sloth from the goonies! Then last night I dreamt I'd become so indifferent that I killed someone and had to find some way of hiding their body. It's pretty f'd up but they're just dreams.
Life definitely seems to be improving though I wouldn't want to tempt fate. I'm mostly in a happier state, I'm beating myself up about things less and less, in fact not at all. I went to a shrink the other day who said I have adhd and put me on meds, I haven't taken them yet.
The last few days though I've been having some disturbing dreams, dreams where really horrible things happen and I find myself having to deal with them - then I wake up thinking "fuck, I'm so relieved that was just a dream".
This morning for instance I awoke from a dream where if lost all my teeth and looked like sloth from the goonies! Then last night I dreamt I'd become so indifferent that I killed someone and had to find some way of hiding their body. It's pretty f'd up but they're just dreams.
Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
