Fresh start - EHPRA 2.0

[cataleya]

Day 82

It should have been 90 days so far but I have been travelling so 82 so far.

I am not sure what to say about E2...due to this Naturalizer thing it is hard for me to see clear changes. I wish I could say "yes, E2 is definitely doing/healing xy!". I will mention some stuff but is primarily speculation on my part.

1. Had a fight with a friend recently. He was mad about something. He is the type of person who always has to be right which makes it impossible to argue with him. Anyway, I think I reacted pretty well this time. I calmly told him my point of view. I got upset later on but it did not last a long time. I detached from the whole thing pretty quickly. Normally, it would be something that would bug me for awhile. I just wish I could be more present when I am arguing. I just get overwhelmed with emotions and shut down. Only after when I cool off,I am able to have an argumentative conversation. It is getting better though.

2. Ok so everyone is reporting resistance, depression, bad mood every now and then. I have been listening for 82 days so far and I am still not having any of that I am pretty happy and positive. I get some negative thoughts, it is mostly negative self talk but that is about it.

3. Still no improvement regarding my relationship with my dad. Still irritated with him as in day 1.

4. I noticed in the last 7 days or so I am getting like 10-minute spikes of massive motivation. Then it`s over hopefully E2 is doing something in that area.

5. Great relationships with my friends and coworkers. I can feel that they are more loving towards me. Lots of compliments. I feel loved.

Just a comment unrelated to my journal...I read lot of other people journals here. Everything from E2 to DMSI. Regarding DMSI, I just wish people here could be more patient with the testing phase and less attacking Shannon. Shannon, sir...you have nerves of steel.

Glad your relationships with your friends and co-workers are doing well. That in itself is a blessing. Sorry to hear about your Dad's situation hasn't changed... yet, most importantly, that you are improving yourself in the meantime; Sometimes, we can't change others, even with the best intentions. Yet, when they see positive changes with us perhaps, they choose jealousy, uncomfortable or they feel left behind/disconnected :angel:

Yeah not sure how many months of E2 is gonna be neccessary to deal with my issues with my dad but it's ok, I am not obsessing over it. I am enjoying everything else