F is for Fear Removal - OF 5.75G

[Bayern2]

Cycle 3 - Days 4-6:

Feeling a lot more confident and level headed recently on OF. Last night for about an hour to two hours I had a bout of exhaustion set in, but it went away really quickly. Also, on Day 4 I had a period where my body felt like it was about 10 degrees hotter than normal, but that also went away after about half an hour. This morning I also woke up doubting parts of my masculinity and still having this childlike mindset, but as the day has been going on those thoughts have went away.

Not much else to report on lately as I'm slowly starting to become more level headed and my sleep patterns have been getting better and better as my usage of the program increases. I'm still using the program as instructed, 6 loops per night at a volume of 13/15. I am, however, starting to have thoughts of wanting to run the program more since I'm not exhausted on the program anymore, but I'll take the 3 days off and continue to monitor the program.

[Bayern2]

Day of 1 my break..

There are a few things that I'm starting to notice. First, it's starting to seem like I'm getting more tired on my days off than when I am on the program. I understand, or guessing at least, that could be from the processing time given to the sub. Second, PMO is starting to slowly fade as an option for me. Certainly I've had a few thoughts about it. The first two cycles it felt like I was resisting this part cause the thoughts came up a lot more often and were harder to fight off, but the last week all thoughts of doing it have seemingly faded and made it much easier to not do it, Finally, the new thing that I feel like I'm resisting for this program is that I've been overeating quite a bit the last two weeks. It's something I really need to be conscious of and need to really think about to overcome.

Loving this program though, this has been a good ride so far.

[Bayern2]

So tempting to pre-order LTU6 right now. Really tough to decide cause I'm loving how I feel on OF though and want to continue to use that for a little bit. Unsure of what I should do, but we'll see how this next cycle starting tonight goes.

[Bayern2]

Cycle 4 - Day 1:

Decided to go ahead and purchase the pre-order for LTU6. That one's going to be a monster and I can't wait for it. All day yesterday before listening to my loops for this new cycle I was regretting taking 3 days off, but that's what the instructions say so I'll follow those but I felt like 2 day break was enough and was itching to run OF again.

This morning woke up lethargic but was fine after I drank some coffee. Went out this morning to the store, and I"m back to being in my own little world with the "no care in the world" feeling. I don't even notice other people I just instinctively move in my own direction and do what I need to do. No fear, no anxiety, nothing. I'm a lot more confident and more direct when talking to people.

On my 2nd night of the break when I was asleep I had a dream where I was at an old lake house, and swimming there were these giant spiders (maybe scorpions idk) that I was terrified of when I was swimming. It was worse that they could swim and scared the ever living crap out of me. After I got out of the water they left the area and I eventually was swimming again more freely.

[Shannon]

After the first couple cycles, it's okay to start using the program more than instructed if that is what you feel the urge to do. Less days off, etc.

[Bayern2]

Cycle 4 - Days 2 - 4

Don't want to jinx anything, but man I really feel like PMO is a going to be a thing of the past for me now. I don't have a single thought or urge to even want to do it. My mind has now shifted to want a real connection again and to finally put myself out there, which I haven't in a long time I think from some deep fear that I have of putting myself out there.

Energy levels are up and down, today has been great but the last couple of days I just wanted to pass out at like 8pm, which is early for me since I usually go to bed after midnight right now. Also noticing that I'm feeling a lot more refreshed after getting less sleep, so I'm starting to naturally wake up an hour to an hour and a half earlier than I normally would.

[Shannon]

It is going to be a process, getting to a permanent state where PMO is no longer an issue. It will continue to reduce, and when it's "gone" from a conscious point of view, it will still need time to be completely wiped out from your subconscious. That's part of why the 8 months, and why I strongly urge all of you using this program who are getting good results to see it through to the end.

But congrats on your progress!

[Bayern2]

It is going to be a process, getting to a permanent state where PMO is no longer an issue.  It will continue to reduce, and when it's "gone" from a conscious point of view, it will still need time to be completely wiped out from your subconscious.  That's part of why the 8 months, and why I strongly urge all of you using this program who are getting good results to see it through to the end.

But congrats on your progress!

Thanks Shannon.  I fully intend to keep running this as long as I need to.  Even after pre-ordering LTU, that can wait until I'm done with OF.  This really has been, even in just short amount of time running it, the best sub I've used.

[Shannon]

I'm glad my year of hell making it was worth it.

[Bayern2]

Cycle 4 - Days 5 and 6:

Ended up sleeping a lot longer last night, almost 10 hours which is pretty rare for me these days, but I'm happy I got it and when I woke up I felt great and felt like I really needed a long sleep like that.

Both yesterday and today during the middle of the afternoon I developed a migraine headache that lasted about an hour and a half each day. I knew it was coming both days cause my jaw started hurting, which usually does when I have a headache cause I have pretty bad TMJ, and my vision felt like it was going to go blurry and became lighter. These types of headaches don't happen very often at all, so for it to happen two days in a row is very strange, so I don't know if its sub related or not, just something worth mentioning I think.

Tonight starts my break after the 4th cycle, and for the first time I'm happy to get to the break.

[Bayern2]

Whoops. Almost forgot to mention yesterday I think I finally got the kick in the a** to finally clean up my diet. It was something I mentioned in my first post as one of the major things I'm hoping to get under control by using OF, and now I feel like I have found the reasoning and push I needed to finally work on it.

[Bayern2]

Cycle 5 - Days 1 and 2:

So I've still had migraines since Friday. I've had a migraine now four out of the last six days. And against better judgement, I only took two days off before starting to run this cycle. Monday my migraine got so bad I had to shut everything off and just lie down and attempt to go to sleep. This morning I also woke up with a really bad headache, so the last couple the pain has easily been an 8.5 or 9/10.

I'm going to stick with it, but if these headaches keep up at this rate I don't know if I should take a break or what. Everything else has been running pretty smoothly.

[Shannon]

If this is a resistance headache, then it's working on something very important. You have a few options.

Option #1 is just plow through it.
Option #2 is to back off on one variable until the headaches fade, and then slowly ramp back up as you can.
Option 3 is to stop using the program.

The headaches are designed to cause you to choose #3. Not recommended.

But you shouldn't have to suffer. While "plowing through" will probably get through whatever is causing the headaches faster than anything else, there is something to be said for a slower, gentler approach, as long as it is still making progress. You may want to try lowering the volume a little bit per day and see what happens. Then go a cycle with whatever volume results in no headaches, and start increasing it a bit per cycle after that until you can run it at normal volume again.

[Bayern2]

It feels like they are resistance headaches, because these types of headaches are extremely rare for me to get and the last one I've had this bad was at least a year to a year and a half ago, so to get 4 in a 6 day period is odd.

I won't stop, that's for sure. I'll try to plow through the next couple of days and see how I feel, and if things improve then great, and if it continues I'll lower the volume a click to see if it helps. I'd much rather make progress and continue with the program if it means it's working on something important.