(08-25-2018, 07:52 AM)Shannon Wrote: You are framing the process as "hunting or being hunted". That's artificially limited thinking. It isn't hunting or being hunted, it's being so attractive that others want you in a desirable way, and they come to you, offer themselves to you and attempt to interest you in having sex with them. Where is the threat in that?
Framing is everything. You guys don't have to equate everything with violence, dominance and threat.
I agree with the reframe that you have done here Shannon. It makes total sense.
My mindset is similar to 'hunting/hunted' except that I use a different wordings. Concerning having sex, there are 2 possible roles. Active and passive.
In the 'how to become alpha' book that you recommend to read to the AM users, there is a concept with which is in line with my beliefs:
Women usually assume the passive role when it comes to sex.
That means that the man have to lead up to having sex
For that reason, I have a hard time conceiving that for a male DMSI user, he can just sit back and wait women that he finds attractive to come over and suggest sex like you wrote several times here in the forum. IOW, what is written in the alpha book that maps how I perceive reality and how you say DMSI users should behave appears to be in contradiction.
My expectation of DMSI was that by being irresistible, picking up chicks would be easy as a piece of cake because they would be super receptive to my advances since they are already attracted to me.
I know by doing it myself too often. I am not explicitly expressing my sexual attraction to women. It is quite easy for me to imagine that the women finding me irresistible don't act on their desires. It must be even harder for them since this is reinforced by stupid social norms that says that women should have the passive role.
The only context in which I can conceive women coming over to you and suggest sex is from social circle where you have solid social proof going for you and you have the opportunity to see the woman on several occasions. Otherwise, in case of cold approach, I think it necessary for a man to lead to having sex.
OTOH, to be honest with the DMSI program, my first successful seduction with DMSI from the very few that I had, a girl that I met in a wedding, I have been very explicit verbally and non-verbally about my sexual interest in her (maybe the alcohol helped removing my inhibitions) and once that was done. SHE did pursue me.
It is as if once you express yourself sexually, the woman is able to put you in the potential sexual partner category and this allow her express her true nature to you without the social mask.
I guess that I have a hard time getting rid of the social conditioning concerning sexuality about what is appropriate/inappropriate to do with strangers. That might also be a question of deeply ingrained beliefs about women. If you see them as very sexual as they are. You communicate subconsciously your expectations on their behavior with you and they naturally adjust. I am wondering if there is something along those lines inside DMSI... (ie: All women are naughty. If you believe it, it will become true. Think that they are good girls, and they will be good girls with you...)
For me, those 2-3 points are why I am on AM now:
1. Improve my social life
2. Improve my leadership skills
3. Be able shamelessly and freely express my desires
4. Be willing to take more risks in my social interactions with women
I am starting to realize that the AM/SM combo is more in line with how I want to become... Only when this goal is achieved and that I become that man, DMSI would be like the cherry on top of the sundae...
And yes I can relate to what kingpill wrote about having excuses to not execute. When I'm not expressing my sexual interest to a woman, I have this inner dialogue providing me 'justifications' for why I shouldn't...
