BASE 5G - and then there was light

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I should probably start a journal too
Just calling out for help wouldn't provide a balanced view of the sub.

As some of you may be aware, I ran into some issues in Stage 2, and that prompted my I'm-freaking-out posts. I reread my posts and feel relieved* now, because those experiences are behind me.

*I didn't laugh nor chuckle. They were, to me, at that time of writing, stressful or frightening in their own way.

I am deeply grateful that Shannon chose to create BASE. It will push you OUT of your comfort zone, which BASE hit the target. However, what I did not expect were the zones that I pushed out of.

[blue42]

what has been done, can be undone. YOUR IN CONTROL!

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blue, how timely is your comment... that is so true!

The replies that followed my SOS posts generally tells me that I'm resisting the sub. I did not agree, and pressed on. Things weren't changing for the better until yesterday... I caved in and toyed with the idea, what if I am resisting the sub? Suddenly a light just went off and a flood of thoughts crossed my mind. It was like I had knocked down a dam and then the thoughts rushed past it. Generally about keeping healthy, building a healthy lifestyle.

WHAT?! I thought I lead a pretty healthy lifestyle! HA! I then examined my lifestyle and my definition. They didn't match up. I had imagined it all in my head but not all were applied onto my life. How wrong I was... and my subconscious pointed it out to me.

As I was pondering over this, I had a flashback to one of the extended family dinners years back... my aunt had contracted cancer (early stages, she is now ok), and at the dinner table she said something to the tune of: I always eat healthy and watch what I eat...

I now wondered... are we really conscious of what we eat or how we live?

Also, since I started BASE, my posture has been killing me. I'm slumped over, I walk hunched, my back hurts, my shoulders too. And I was wondering why why why... shouldn't BASE increase my confidence and have me walking straighter?

Well, after toying with the resistance idea, I have started walking straighter and sit with better postures.

I do not know what was it in the sub that I was resisting, but I clearly wasted a month resisting it unknowingly...

[Ivaylo]

I do not know what was it in the sub that I was resisting, but I clearly wasted a month resisting it unknowingly...

I wouldn't call it wasted if that's what it took for you to become aware of the resistance.

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Thank you Ivaylo, that was really positive. And you know the first thought that crossed my mind? "Wow you guys are light years ahead of me" and I'm thinking, wow I'm so negative! Is this the way I've been talking to myself?...

[Shannon]

There is no wasted time if you learn, adjust and improve. It sometimes takes that time to bring the necessary changes to your consciousness, and it is all part of the process of improvement.

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Lessons I've learned:

You can fight it. Your conscious mind can control your subconscious. It takes effort, willpower.
But if you let your subconsious do the job, your conscious mind can relax.

Now when I see people in anger, I wonder what they are trying to control. Yelling to make a point. It doesn't work. I've changed. Let it be. Let it go.

This isn't AF, where I can be a better version of myself.
BASE is... it changes who you are, the way you define yourself.

I was resisting it to retain me, my old self. But i am no longer me. The harder I fight it, the more I bleed with anger. This was hard to accept. But have faith, that it will be better. This is the comfort zone that I would never leave... but I have... I have left.

It happened so fast... I wondered how much of me would stay. I wondered if the lessons I've learned before would stay. The pain that kept me on that path, if taken away, would I still stay on that path?

It's like a culture shock. I asked, what I would be without BASE.

I'm like a patient who lost her memory, and lives again, except I haven't lost it. Only the emotions tied to it.

[I am a self helper]

Lessons I've learned:

You can fight it. Your conscious mind can control your subconscious. It takes effort, willpower.
But if you let your subconsious do the job, your conscious mind can relax.

Now when I see people in anger, I wonder what they are trying to control. Yelling to make a point. It doesn't work. I've changed. Let it be. Let it go.

This isn't AF, where I can be a better version of myself.
BASE is... it changes who you are, the way you define yourself.

I was resisting it to retain me, my old self. But i am no longer me. The harder I fight it, the more I bleed with anger. This was hard to accept. But have faith, that it will be better. This is the comfort zone that I would never leave... but I have... I have left.

wow. Very inspiring. Thank you for sharing

It happened so fast... I wondered how much of me would stay. I wondered if the lessons I've learned before would stay. The pain that kept me on that path, if taken away, would I still stay on that path?

It's like a culture shock. I asked, what I would be without BASE.

I'm like a patient who lost her memory, and lives again, except I haven't lost it. Only the emotions tied to it.

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The 6 months doing BASE was tough, because of the anger issues I experienced. It was tough on the people around me, especially for my loved ones. Nothing in the expectations of BASE came to fruition during BASE. I'm off BASE for more than 2 weeks now, and I can feel the script settling down on me. It's quite an experience.

I suspect that I might have overdone the number of hours on BASE, which led me to mental tiredness, and hence, increased irritability. When I'm off the sub, I sorta zoomed back to before (referring specifically to anger), but better (I'm no longer irritable nor short tempered). During BASE, most days were tired, but not fatigued. I did not attribute my tiredness to BASE though. But in retrospect, I might have overdone my daily hours.

Since my FAQ posting on anger management, I had been looking at LTU. It's something Ive been wanting to do, but I wondered if it would override BASE. I wondered if I should let BASE settle down more, wait longer before I start another sub.

As for the aftermath of BASE experience, I am experiencing the following in no particular order:
-insomnia, I am thinking a lot on which business to start, where to put my time in. I can only sleep when I'm very tired.
-I'm struggling a bit between my previous self (before BASE) and my new self on what action to take, like torn between outsourcing for (likely to be a) 4-figure sum or doing it myself; getting the product up first vs proof of concept first
-I find myself sticking to one project at a time, rather than getting scattered across many new projects
-my brain is very busy. I'm always lost in thought, even though I have no idea what I might be thinking about.
-I need to talk about things in order for my brain to process it. Thinking quietly doesn't help at all. It's like the script is settling in (think: many many "words" are tring to find their place), and as I am thinking more "words" are pouring into my brain. Yeah.
-different mindset. I see things differently.
-great BS detector. More than before. But I cannot hide the body language that shows discomfort when the BS is pouring out of someone else's mouth. As they are speaking, I am literally thinking, "wow what a waste of time to listen to this whole story..."
-more comfortable socially
-no more sweaty palms
-forgiven significant people whom I didn't know if I would ever forgive them. In this department, dramatic changes, I had no idea how much negative feelings and emotions I held within me. Now I don't recall much the bad events, which I suspect, were held together for too long because of the emotions that tied to them. I could remember them if I tried hard to recollect.
-more assertive. People who exude high self confidence used to intimidate me. Even when BS poured out of their mouths, their confident (or some may say arrogant) demeanor makes me believe what they say to be true or hold some truth. Now, I look past that outer shell and see the BS, then I proceed to destroy the BS (in a socially acceptable manner of course)

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Nothing in the expectations of BASE came to fruition during BASE.

The natural expectations of BASE, I clarify, are actions leading to starting a business, running one, or doing anything business-wise or what is defined as "entrepreneurial". I have experienced improvements in other areas which were tackled by BASE though (details above).

[Shannon]

Turning a turtle into a dragon takes time.

[jonathan4all]

Turning a turtle into a dragon takes time.

So There is hope for BASE USERS

[Benjamin]

So There is hope for BASE USERS

BASD = Build A Successful Dragon.

You'll be conquering peasants and burning down villages in no time!

[jonathan4all]

So There is hope for BASE USERS

BASD = Build A Successful Dragon.

You'll be conquering peasants and burning down villages in no time!

I have already burnt my town Now I'm heading to capital Lol