08-17-2013, 01:04 PM
(08-17-2013, 08:16 AM)mat422 Wrote: Focusing on the future helps, but it's not just mental. It's not just sadness or negative feelings. It's a physical thing. I'm burned out, I'm tired, I'm slow, everything takes tremendous effort. I can't really aim for the stars, I've got nothing to shoot for at the moment. That's how it's always been for me since I was a teenager, when depression hit me. I used to think if I just focused on the future and started getting my life together things would get better. It's not the case. The external has limited impact on how I feel on the inside. Just realizing that and taking this depression thing more seriously instead of some minor phase that I need to grow out of is important. Pushing it away doesn't work, I've been pushing it away for too long. It's a serious problem in my life and it's only grown worse as I've gotten older.
I guess what I'm saying is this is like trying to run through a brick wall. You have to take down the brick wall first before you can move past it. So I have to start focusing on getting better before I can move forward. Ideally I'd want to do both at once, but I just have to accept that I have limited resources and instead of splitting my focus several different ways I should target this one obstacle.
Look man, you don't have to tell me how it is, I know. And I'm telling you, you just move forward. Heck I feel lethargic, apathetic, and crummy most of the time, but it's background noise.
I'm also not saying you push it away. You accept it. And by accepting it, integrating it, and owning the fact that you feel that way while focusing on the future, it becomes a comrade instead of an obstacle.
Have you read my journal and how I'm starting to see results with women because of my mind set? Where do you think that mind set comes from? A history of bliss?
Live your own life man, don't see the shoes you wear as wrong or "obstacles" to overcome before you can move. Accept that you're wearing them, and get moving. At least, that's what I try to do.
I think a problem with "depression" is that we think it needs to be gone before we can do anything. It's like going to the gym or doing anything in life. We think we have to feel "good" before we can do anything nowadays, but it's not true. Heck, there have been plenty of times where I went to the gym despite the fact that I was too tired or felt compromised in some physical way. There have been times where I've talked to women despite feeling like complete shit. And you know what? I made progress in both areas.
Growth hurts my man, and life ain't a bed of roses.
