AM7 - Frosted

[Frosted]

CPTSD (assuming that is what you have) takes a long time to heal, because of how deeply embedded it is in the nervous system. It rewires things at a level that just doesn't respond to quick fixes. So the timeline is always going to feel frustratingly slow and non-linear.

But the fact that you're making progress, as you say yourself, even if it doesn't show up yet in the external stuff, means you're moving forward. And that puts you ahead of the vast majority of people carrying this condition, most of whom stay in a victim mindset (can't really blame them though) all their life and never make any progress at all

You’re probably right. Over time I’ve come to value actual lasting change in a way that most people would probably gloss over as insignificant or too slow.

[Frosted]

Good to hear Frosted, reading that from the outside it sounds like quite a bit of progress.

Generally the best way to find women with more substance is to goto events or things you enjoy yourself and meet women who are on the same wavelength. The challenge there is being in a small place.

Thanks. I feel like AM7 might be pushing me to look at the objective limitations I tend to devalue or put off.

That’s some solid advice. I was thinking of doing something much like that at some point. And yeah being in a small place is hard; I have to drive 100 miles to go to what is probably not even a medium sized city.

[Frosted]

Been feeling meek and fearful today for some reason.

[NOMAD]

Been feeling meek and fearful today for some reason.

That means it's time to double down with your meditation practices and sitting with that feeling. Embrace the fear. Don't fight it. Stay neutral and feel it. Let your brain and body process it. 

I know you already know this.  Keep going.

[Frosted]

Been feeling meek and fearful today for some reason.

That means it's time to double down with your meditation practices and sitting with that feeling. Embrace the fear. Don't fight it. Stay neutral and feel it. Let your brain and body process it. 

I know you already know this.  Keep going.

True. I'll try and force it in to my schedule again. I think meditation is one of my highest leverage plays right now.

[Frosted]

Just noticed my "knowing" intelligence is working better. It's like I'm starting to be able to actually slow down and "grasp" things better and actually "see" them. Like a natural intelligence I've always had, but that's been blocked is coming online. I'm also just grasping things easily that before I would have to read over and over and try to manually force myself past whatever blockages were causing me to not be able to just understand and take in what was right in front of me. I believe brain optimizer and PRA are both responsible.

[Frosted]

Long time no see. More hermit mode afoot. I feel like so much of my journey is just becoming more humble to the fact that I’m not as far as I think I am and acknowledging my shortcomings. I’m noticing more of my trauma responses for what they are, now that I’ve done enough work to recognize the deeper layers while they’re triggering. I’m understanding myself and how I work more and deconstructing/dissolving things slowly over time. I’m still really traumatized, just a lot more functional than before.

I was planning on going to an rsd free tour and got roped into a boot camp. They didn’t really have to twist my arm though, because I was already on the fence, and they offered me a great price. It’s been so long since I’ve started watching Owen’s content. At this point I figured even if I spend the money and nothing comes of it, the experience is worth it. Even if I get nothing, that too will be a learning experience.

It’ll be sometime later this year, so more time for me to get my shit together and for AM7 to work it’s magic on me. I’m supposed to be going out, but my car broke down, and I’m not really willing to go out in my small town, so that’ll have to wait until I get reliable transportation. Until then I’ll focus on getting a haircut and improving my style.

Feeling random urges to clean my room that are promising. The prospect feels a lot less overwhelming.

I didn’t get back into meditation, but the more I think about it, the more I want to. It just feels more and more like the only thing worth spending my time on (second to these subliminals, of course) compared to anything else. As I get older, I’m finding that what I value is who I become and the improving the quality of my personal experience. I’m leaning towards Concentration meditation (which gives access to Janna, which will give me access to bliss as a baseline, given enough time), Insight meditation (this gives stability and resilience to pressure), and meta (this gives warmth and humanity, and fosters a feeling of connection to the world).

[Womanizer]

That's cool that you're going to an RSD event. I watch Owen's content myself, I like how he rebranded himself as a social dynamics coach instead of a PUA. That's how I know him from pua back in the day. How much did the boot camp cost you if you don't mind me asking and where at?

[Frosted]

That's cool that you're going to an RSD event. I watch Owen's content myself, I like how he rebranded himself as a social dynamics coach instead of a PUA. That's how I know him from pua back in the day.  How much did the boot camp cost you if you don't mind me asking and where at?

They’re currently running 6k which was outside my budget. The coach was willing to work with me and gave me a discount and a payment plan. I haven’t decided where to go yet. I’m thinking New York sometime at the end of the year.

I recommend going to a free tour first if you haven’t already. You’ll likely get a sales call where they try to sell you on the boot camp. I also hear that Owen will often give a discount to the first few people who sign up at a free tour. But also free tour is just worth it for getting to see him in person.