05-30-2015, 11:36 PM
I'm curious if anyone is actually reading this?
Well, that's actually because I'm in a real angry funk. Very similar to what I experienced the other day but I think more intense. I'm starting to think it's not caused by the subliminal but possibly from the practices I do every now and then. A bit of qi gong, chi cultivation, sex energy cultivation/transformation, some tantra solo energy practices (similar to chi cultivation), and chakra breathing. I did the whole lot yesterday afternoon before leaving the house for drinks with some friends. Didn't notice any negativity until towards the end of the night and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks.
The online girl feels like she's creating distance although I'm not really sure. My house mate, plus two of my mates came with me to the drinks. It actually went quite well. Met one girl who was really great. I stayed chatting with her for ages. Suggested we get a coffee and she said she'd love to catch up. I assume that means as friends but the vibe felt like something more.
Had some good chats with a few other women. One of my mates joked about why I was sitting in the corner by myself. I wasn't. I wanted to sit on a chair and I joked that it's acceptable if you look comfortable. I was leaned back, arms up on the railing. A couple of minutes later one of the girls from the group comes over to introduce herself. I asked about her jewellery and she laughed and said she's never been asked that before and it's a great question. Had a good chat with her. Got her number later in the night and then regretted it about five minutes later when I realised she was extremely drunk. Within about 15 minutes she was practically groping and grabbing any guy in the group with a penis. I can't stand chicks like that. Watching the spectacle was probably what set my anger/frustration into full swing. Plus there was some random married chick on the dancefloor hanging around my mate who's a bit shy. Turns out she was married. People like that are f*cking disgraceful. They feel like shit about themselves so screw over other people to feel good about themselves.
I sent the girl a text hoping she hadn't saved my number. I don't know if she'd saved it but she figured out who it was haha. I have to admit the personality shift was massive. The sober version of her was awesome, bubbly, fascinating, and a great feminine vibe then she ruined it by getting trashy.
As you can tell from the tone of this post my anger/frustration isn't gone. It's less edgy but still solid. When I was waiting for my bus last night there was another trashed woman. I have no idea where she got all the food from but she had I'd say the equivalent of three plastic bags full of food rubbish. She apologised to me for leaving her rubbish around. Which is understandable because for some crazy reason the transit authorities decided to remove almost all bins from bus stations and train stations. Then she asked some random guy if he found money, then hunted through her bags of rubbish. Then she was in tears because she lost her phone or something.
I was in such a bad mood when I got home that I just lay on my bed fuming, staring at the ceiling. I'm almost scared to do those practices again. I know it's probably a good thing though. I guess by clearing blocks, releasing and working through all this anger that's coming up, this will help the subliminals to work even more effectively?
I'm also finding that I'm getting increasingly frustrated that I'm not getting the results that I'm expecting. I'm expecting that women will show interest in me similar to what some people are reporting. Is this the resistance that people are talking about? I feel like, what if it doesn't work and I'm wasting my time if the results don't happen in later stages. Although I do understand that Shannon has specified that the results won't generally be seen until at least Stage 3. It could be that other people are becoming more aware of pre-existing results. Kind of like if someone wants a red car and they focus on that, then suddenly everywhere they go it's like there are more red cars on the road than normal when in reality they are noticing the red cars that have always been there.
I need to hit up and connect with some Qi Gong practitioners/teachers to find out what's going on with this anger/frustration.
Currently average 19/20 hours per day for the subs. Although an average of 1-2 hours a day is on mono speaker.
In terms of inner change I definitely feel like something is happening. It's second nature for me to go up to groups in the social events and interact. I saw a cute blonde girl and it felt second nature to position myself beside her to start a conversation.
There was a cute girl who looked at me and I thought I might know her so went over and said hi. We chatted and I don't think she connected with my questions. I like to ask girls things like what excites them, etc Suddenly she says to me, have you met my girl friend and introduces me to this other girl. I thought she was just passing me along but her friend was actually more grounded than she was so I found her more attractive. About 5-10 minutes the original girl heard me say I like photography and points at her friend and exclaims, Oh she's a really good artist. Which sounded to me like she was trying to bring us together kind of thing. Later though her friend moved away from me to talk to one of hte girls so I wandered away and lost track of her.
The girl who organises the drinks, for some reason I went up to her and put my hands on her waist to get attention. She turned around a bit surprised I think. The person in the circle opposite her left and she took their spot so not sure if she was deliberately moving away.
Well, that's actually because I'm in a real angry funk. Very similar to what I experienced the other day but I think more intense. I'm starting to think it's not caused by the subliminal but possibly from the practices I do every now and then. A bit of qi gong, chi cultivation, sex energy cultivation/transformation, some tantra solo energy practices (similar to chi cultivation), and chakra breathing. I did the whole lot yesterday afternoon before leaving the house for drinks with some friends. Didn't notice any negativity until towards the end of the night and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks.
The online girl feels like she's creating distance although I'm not really sure. My house mate, plus two of my mates came with me to the drinks. It actually went quite well. Met one girl who was really great. I stayed chatting with her for ages. Suggested we get a coffee and she said she'd love to catch up. I assume that means as friends but the vibe felt like something more.
Had some good chats with a few other women. One of my mates joked about why I was sitting in the corner by myself. I wasn't. I wanted to sit on a chair and I joked that it's acceptable if you look comfortable. I was leaned back, arms up on the railing. A couple of minutes later one of the girls from the group comes over to introduce herself. I asked about her jewellery and she laughed and said she's never been asked that before and it's a great question. Had a good chat with her. Got her number later in the night and then regretted it about five minutes later when I realised she was extremely drunk. Within about 15 minutes she was practically groping and grabbing any guy in the group with a penis. I can't stand chicks like that. Watching the spectacle was probably what set my anger/frustration into full swing. Plus there was some random married chick on the dancefloor hanging around my mate who's a bit shy. Turns out she was married. People like that are f*cking disgraceful. They feel like shit about themselves so screw over other people to feel good about themselves.
I sent the girl a text hoping she hadn't saved my number. I don't know if she'd saved it but she figured out who it was haha. I have to admit the personality shift was massive. The sober version of her was awesome, bubbly, fascinating, and a great feminine vibe then she ruined it by getting trashy.
As you can tell from the tone of this post my anger/frustration isn't gone. It's less edgy but still solid. When I was waiting for my bus last night there was another trashed woman. I have no idea where she got all the food from but she had I'd say the equivalent of three plastic bags full of food rubbish. She apologised to me for leaving her rubbish around. Which is understandable because for some crazy reason the transit authorities decided to remove almost all bins from bus stations and train stations. Then she asked some random guy if he found money, then hunted through her bags of rubbish. Then she was in tears because she lost her phone or something.
I was in such a bad mood when I got home that I just lay on my bed fuming, staring at the ceiling. I'm almost scared to do those practices again. I know it's probably a good thing though. I guess by clearing blocks, releasing and working through all this anger that's coming up, this will help the subliminals to work even more effectively?
I'm also finding that I'm getting increasingly frustrated that I'm not getting the results that I'm expecting. I'm expecting that women will show interest in me similar to what some people are reporting. Is this the resistance that people are talking about? I feel like, what if it doesn't work and I'm wasting my time if the results don't happen in later stages. Although I do understand that Shannon has specified that the results won't generally be seen until at least Stage 3. It could be that other people are becoming more aware of pre-existing results. Kind of like if someone wants a red car and they focus on that, then suddenly everywhere they go it's like there are more red cars on the road than normal when in reality they are noticing the red cars that have always been there.
I need to hit up and connect with some Qi Gong practitioners/teachers to find out what's going on with this anger/frustration.
Currently average 19/20 hours per day for the subs. Although an average of 1-2 hours a day is on mono speaker.
In terms of inner change I definitely feel like something is happening. It's second nature for me to go up to groups in the social events and interact. I saw a cute blonde girl and it felt second nature to position myself beside her to start a conversation.
There was a cute girl who looked at me and I thought I might know her so went over and said hi. We chatted and I don't think she connected with my questions. I like to ask girls things like what excites them, etc Suddenly she says to me, have you met my girl friend and introduces me to this other girl. I thought she was just passing me along but her friend was actually more grounded than she was so I found her more attractive. About 5-10 minutes the original girl heard me say I like photography and points at her friend and exclaims, Oh she's a really good artist. Which sounded to me like she was trying to bring us together kind of thing. Later though her friend moved away from me to talk to one of hte girls so I wandered away and lost track of her.
The girl who organises the drinks, for some reason I went up to her and put my hands on her waist to get attention. She turned around a bit surprised I think. The person in the circle opposite her left and she took their spot so not sure if she was deliberately moving away.
