07-23-2018, 02:47 AM
Definitely still fear in me of losing my self. I had a moment yesterday where I felt like DMSI was changing who I was. That I'd just become someone I didn't even recognize. But not in a good way. For a long time I wanted to erase my old self because I hated it so much, so much anger directed at myself. But lately as DMSI digs deeper, I find myself feeling like it's important to be myself 100%. It's just about distinguishing between the limiting beliefs vs who I am. One thing that has come about with all this is understanding how truly awful I've been to myself. I mean no wonder a part of me feared all this change, I was trying to erase it out of existence because I was so ashamed of it and saw it as disposable. That's not healthy in any way. So I think there were some motivations there to move forward that weren't entirely coming from a compassionate place.
INFP