stage 2 day 8
Having multiple women in my life as an base need fits and might be influenced by BD's book. Not caring anyways, but recognize how this might kill off neediness. Notice when chatting with several women at the same time and having option by reflecting back, I indeed balanced out a bit and even had an attitude of "just stop for a minute, i value my time aswell", like its an sort of side effect and no big deal. I realize I have had women in my life all the time.. I value my time. Its an understanding, not some desperate beta trait of actually needing, but rather drawing in, magnetic. Same goes from other areas in my life. I remember reading on this forums that someone wrote down about how it doesnt matter in the frame of "if I have ten women in my life, does she matter?" ofcourse not. Cultivate this abundance mentality.
Increasingly hostile to the idea of some boss commanding me and working for some boss. It rubs the wrong way and the thought is met with an strong opposition and an "no", dont tell me what to do attitude. Now transforming this is something to work on. Also am aware as to how I tend to want to stay in an upbeat mood, while the other side and asshole side is not something to be pushed away. Embrace the whole spectrum.
People treat me differently and startle when being in an IDGAF mode or rather being more uninhibited and just present when making eye contact and socialize.
Currently stuff comes up again. Had some confidence breakthroughs this morning. Im rather angry. Embrace it.
Shame around hygiëne and grooming is reduced pretty clear. Putting myself out there. Its an accepted reality now and something speaking for itself and incorporated.
Going to master music, part of having my stuff in order and what I listen to.
Notice an friend gets more clingy and it somewhat annoys me aswell. Told him off when I had enough but he kept going. I'm valueing my time much more right now, lots of stuff I'm no longer intersted in and my time is more of value then that. To be focussed on what matters to me, instead of TV, movies and the stuff. Im looking rather at it now as something insignificant and can barely watch it. My interest is directly gone.
Loads of fears are faced. Also crappy scheraios are an building foundation of rising my life up to the skies and optimal independent outcome. Noticing I am pretty logical and wanting to stick to the facts I have. Am reviewing my life again and sense surge of confidence building inside and awesomeness. Taking life back to myself. makes me somewhat think about these millionairs who give to the world in an way, which will pay off again. An total shift in outlook.
Having multiple women in my life as an base need fits and might be influenced by BD's book. Not caring anyways, but recognize how this might kill off neediness. Notice when chatting with several women at the same time and having option by reflecting back, I indeed balanced out a bit and even had an attitude of "just stop for a minute, i value my time aswell", like its an sort of side effect and no big deal. I realize I have had women in my life all the time.. I value my time. Its an understanding, not some desperate beta trait of actually needing, but rather drawing in, magnetic. Same goes from other areas in my life. I remember reading on this forums that someone wrote down about how it doesnt matter in the frame of "if I have ten women in my life, does she matter?" ofcourse not. Cultivate this abundance mentality.
Increasingly hostile to the idea of some boss commanding me and working for some boss. It rubs the wrong way and the thought is met with an strong opposition and an "no", dont tell me what to do attitude. Now transforming this is something to work on. Also am aware as to how I tend to want to stay in an upbeat mood, while the other side and asshole side is not something to be pushed away. Embrace the whole spectrum.
People treat me differently and startle when being in an IDGAF mode or rather being more uninhibited and just present when making eye contact and socialize.
Currently stuff comes up again. Had some confidence breakthroughs this morning. Im rather angry. Embrace it.
Shame around hygiëne and grooming is reduced pretty clear. Putting myself out there. Its an accepted reality now and something speaking for itself and incorporated.
Going to master music, part of having my stuff in order and what I listen to.
Notice an friend gets more clingy and it somewhat annoys me aswell. Told him off when I had enough but he kept going. I'm valueing my time much more right now, lots of stuff I'm no longer intersted in and my time is more of value then that. To be focussed on what matters to me, instead of TV, movies and the stuff. Im looking rather at it now as something insignificant and can barely watch it. My interest is directly gone.
Loads of fears are faced. Also crappy scheraios are an building foundation of rising my life up to the skies and optimal independent outcome. Noticing I am pretty logical and wanting to stick to the facts I have. Am reviewing my life again and sense surge of confidence building inside and awesomeness. Taking life back to myself. makes me somewhat think about these millionairs who give to the world in an way, which will pay off again. An total shift in outlook.
The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. - epictetus