Subliminal Talk
AM 5.0+AOS - Printable Version

+- Subliminal Talk (https://subliminal-talk.com)
+-- Forum: Men's Journals (18+ NSFW) (https://subliminal-talk.com/Forum-Men-s-Journals-18-NSFW)
+--- Forum: Men's Journals (https://subliminal-talk.com/Forum-Men-s-Journals)
+--- Thread: AM 5.0+AOS (/Thread-AM-5-0-AOS)

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - Jake2015 - 06-20-2015

(06-19-2015, 01:45 AM)justint27 Wrote:
(06-18-2015, 07:05 PM)Jake2015 Wrote: Brilliant thank you

You said you learnt about facing fear so was thst because of AOS?

We're you not as interested in fashion etc before AOS?

I really hope I don't get any nightmares when I start. I'm gonna start with EPRHA I think to hit my fears and anxieties

265lbs.??? seriously?? how did you lose all that?

So you listen to the masked tracks through your monitor?
I hope your job side gets sorted

so it does seem like you get moments where your AOS disappears? like you relapse to the guy you once we're and then snap back?

Im not sure if it was AOS or AM that got me to face some of my fears, as I ran both when I first started.

I didn't care about clothes, like most guys. I just wore whatever my parents bought me for christmas, birthdays. I literally would wear the same 3 or 4 shirts for a year. I would wear the same pair of jeans for a couple or maybe even 3-4 yrs - the crotch would blow out and i'd get it sewn up. Shopping didn't exist for me as I hated going to malls, stores and hated being around people period.

The nightmares aren't all that bad. They are temporary. I've had a few really great dreams as well.

I wish I still had a picture to show you of me at that weight. No one ever seems to believe me about that anymore and only really my family knows about it. I threw all those out after I lost the weight and said to myself Im never going back there again. I basically lost it over 6 months the year I turned 21 by changing my diet (basically cutting calories) and walking/jogging around my neighborhood for an hour or two a day.

I'll never be the guy I was before but there are times I don't feel sexy. I think that's normal.

For the job - I just need to start meeting the right people. People with similar mindsets to mine.

There is a bad side or a bit of a curse to being "hot" as Im noticing and a few jealous people will always want to try to knock you down a few pegs, to make themselves feel better (my manager at my store). Or they will presume things about you, that you will leave or that you have tons of opportunities and will choose the best paying one. A lot of people are afraid to talk to you, so its hard to make friends, both women and men.

Hey sorry I didn't realise you had replied but glad I found the post

It's brilliant either way that you faced your fears as this is what I'm eager to deal with. I have fears anxieties but also maybe an ego trip of not wanting to do lesser work or menial work that's below me know what I mean?

If that's how you were before which is like me in regards to same clothes and hating shopping then all I can say is OMG!!!! you have done superbly well!!!

thanks the nightmares part was a little concerning to be honest lol

You see that's the thing I find it hard to cut my calories I don't get how I can do it and walking around my home is so boring it really is. did AOS or AM help with these?

I guess that's how hot women may feel at times too but you have a friend here dude!


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 06-21-2015

(06-20-2015, 06:44 PM)Jake2015 Wrote:
(06-19-2015, 01:45 AM)justint27 Wrote:
(06-18-2015, 07:05 PM)Jake2015 Wrote: Brilliant thank you

You said you learnt about facing fear so was thst because of AOS?

We're you not as interested in fashion etc before AOS?

I really hope I don't get any nightmares when I start. I'm gonna start with EPRHA I think to hit my fears and anxieties

265lbs.??? seriously?? how did you lose all that?

So you listen to the masked tracks through your monitor?
I hope your job side gets sorted

so it does seem like you get moments where your AOS disappears? like you relapse to the guy you once we're and then snap back?

Im not sure if it was AOS or AM that got me to face some of my fears, as I ran both when I first started.

I didn't care about clothes, like most guys. I just wore whatever my parents bought me for christmas, birthdays. I literally would wear the same 3 or 4 shirts for a year. I would wear the same pair of jeans for a couple or maybe even 3-4 yrs - the crotch would blow out and i'd get it sewn up. Shopping didn't exist for me as I hated going to malls, stores and hated being around people period.

The nightmares aren't all that bad. They are temporary. I've had a few really great dreams as well.

I wish I still had a picture to show you of me at that weight. No one ever seems to believe me about that anymore and only really my family knows about it. I threw all those out after I lost the weight and said to myself Im never going back there again. I basically lost it over 6 months the year I turned 21 by changing my diet (basically cutting calories) and walking/jogging around my neighborhood for an hour or two a day.

I'll never be the guy I was before but there are times I don't feel sexy. I think that's normal.

For the job - I just need to start meeting the right people. People with similar mindsets to mine.

There is a bad side or a bit of a curse to being "hot" as Im noticing and a few jealous people will always want to try to knock you down a few pegs, to make themselves feel better (my manager at my store). Or they will presume things about you, that you will leave or that you have tons of opportunities and will choose the best paying one. A lot of people are afraid to talk to you, so its hard to make friends, both women and men.

Hey sorry I didn't realise you had replied but glad I found the post

It's brilliant either way that you faced your fears as this is what I'm eager to deal with. I have fears anxieties but also maybe an ego trip of not wanting to do lesser work or menial work that's below me know what I mean?

If that's how you were before which is like me in regards to same clothes and hating shopping then all I can say is OMG!!!! you have done superbly well!!!

thanks the nightmares part was a little concerning to be honest lol

You see that's the thing I find it hard to cut my calories I don't get how I can do it and walking around my home is so boring it really is. did AOS or AM help with these?

I guess that's how hot women may feel at times too but you have a friend here dude!

One statement I heard that changed my life is "walk through your life like a king". Anybody who is successful has this mindset-I know what I want and I'm going to stay on this path and do whatever it takes to achieve it and no one will stop me. I have the same thoughts about work as you do.

Cutting calories is very very hard. No one likes to be deprived. It helped that I made it a life or death decision when i initially went from 265+lbs-160lbs or so. I knew if i continued down the road of not giving a shit what I put in my mouth that i would die. The weight loss on my AOS journey was minimal, maybe about 10-15lbs. I don't weigh myself anymore but am a size S men's now, sometimes XS, Size 28-29 pants. I lost this weight basically keeping busy looking for a job, being outside every possible moment I could be, going to the mall, walking downtown and trying to keep a steady diet of about 2000 calories a day. I would say right now I am maybe 145-150lbs.

And yup, I am definitely feeling like the hot woman who everyone is afraid to talk to, stutters around etc. Strangely enough most of the women who have been attracted to me as of late have been black.

I just had a woman yell out "HANDSOME" at me down a main street in downtown Toronto a week ago. I had some random guy come up to me in a book store the other day ago asking me about some jewellery I was wearing. I am telling you man, this subliminal stuff is crazy!


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - Jake2015 - 06-21-2015

Yeh the work stuff I gotta sort out

I tried a low carb diet only to leave me with IBS symptoms of cramps and tummy aches so after that I freaked out and put all my weight back on. I realised it was because everything I made was high in spice/chillis so now rather than do low carb I'm just going to plan my meals with healthier carbs etx and learn how to season without making it hot

Black women hey well good for you man cos you're being noticed

hahaha I can't believe how the subliminals worked on you its amazing and for to stick with it for 2 years is fantastic too!


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - Light - 06-22-2015

hey Justin, thanks for the updates, it is always a pleasure to read your thread here. this time i have no questions for you, just want to share some thoughts with you. first of, you are definitely out of place workwise. i have this Feeling that if you are given a Chance, you will be able to prove yourself as a leader of a Group and you will shine. i do believe, though, that you are on the right path choosing to run AM6 because what i noticed reading so many jpournals here is that the Sub tends to direct People to decide on a Job that they want to do. this might happen to you, too. if not, you can go for some other Sub related to work and Job and i am sure it will work with you because you seem to be really receptive. i totally understand the attitude of your co-workers, you are simply out of their league and they are puzzled that you are at that store. i work and go to University at the same time and i do feel what you feel when it Comes to Jobs. i am often well-dressed and go to University but at the same time i do a 2 hours a day menial Job at a Restaurant and when People see me there i definitely lose a bit of value because there is A discrepency between my appearance at work and outside of work. what i do get sometimes is this " oh , is this the guy who works at that fish Restaurant!!!! and their eyes go wide open".
a bit like you, i m quite into Dressing well. what i noticed now heading towards my second stage of AM6 is an insistence on cleanliness ( showers, nails filing ect) i also became more daring in my Dressing (i do not knwo if i can relate that to AM 6 or to my Prior 90 days of BIABW). now i am often in blazers which is very unusual in the Country i live in specially at University and so People ask me if i am going on a date or so that i AM ; IN THEIR Eyes, dressed up. for me, it si just the way i want to be!
you mentined in this thread that you wear size 29 0r 30 and i have the same and what i love about it ( i do not know about Canada, i m in europe) there is always a peice or two left on sale for a ridiculously cheap Price because most other men wear something bigger:-)
for sometime i was interested in Labels, now it is more what my head tells me. i find zara stuff ( though not a big brand) really good. somehow most of their things fit me. also brands from Tkmax.
there is something going on in my hair that is very hard to believe and i do nto want anyone to believe it as yet. i am in my 30 s and so i began to have a bit of Grey White hair ( just A bit in front). two weeks ago i was at work and had this sudden idea in mind, i am having less Grey hair in my head. after two hours i went to the mirror and i checked:-) i shall add nothing now because i am still gathering evidence for it ( taking Fotos) and when the case is convincing enough i will post it. why i mentioned this is because i am wondering if teh Sub has helped you in physically changing your hair! i know you did care for it more but has the Sub done something more than just encouraging you to care for it!!!!sorry i wrote too Long, but just wanted to share this with you and thank you man for your inspirational Journal. now mind you i am not even excited that i might have less Grey hair , because i have exactly the opposite Problem, everyone thinks i am just 26 !!! and i d love to be judged a bit older:-)


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 06-22-2015

(06-22-2015, 12:16 AM)Light Wrote: hey Justin, thanks for the updates, it is always a pleasure to read your thread here. this time i have no questions for you, just want to share some thoughts with you. first of, you are definitely out of place workwise. i have this Feeling that if you are given a Chance, you will be able to prove yourself as a leader of a Group and you will shine. i do believe, though, that you are on the right path choosing to run AM6 because what i noticed reading so many jpournals here is that the Sub tends to direct People to decide on a Job that they want to do. this might happen to you, too. if not, you can go for some other Sub related to work and Job and i am sure it will work with you because you seem to be really receptive. i totally understand the attitude of your co-workers, you are simply out of their league and they are puzzled that you are at that store. i work and go to University at the same time and i do feel what you feel when it Comes to Jobs. i am often well-dressed and go to University but at the same time i do a 2 hours a day menial Job at a Restaurant and when People see me there i definitely lose a bit of value because there is A discrepency between my appearance at work and outside of work. what i do get sometimes is this " oh , is this the guy who works at that fish Restaurant!!!! and their eyes go wide open".
a bit like you, i m quite into Dressing well. what i noticed now heading towards my second stage of AM6 is an insistence on cleanliness ( showers, nails filing ect) i also became more daring in my Dressing (i do not knwo if i can relate that to AM 6 or to my Prior 90 days of BIABW). now i am often in blazers which is very unusual in the Country i live in specially at University and so People ask me if i am going on a date or so that i AM ; IN THEIR Eyes, dressed up. for me, it si just the way i want to be!
you mentined in this thread that you wear size 29 0r 30 and i have the same and what i love about it ( i do not know about Canada, i m in europe) there is always a peice or two left on sale for a ridiculously cheap Price because most other men wear something bigger:-)
for sometime i was interested in Labels, now it is more what my head tells me. i find zara stuff ( though not a big brand) really good. somehow most of their things fit me. also brands from Tkmax.
there is something going on in my hair that is very hard to believe and i do nto want anyone to believe it as yet. i am in my 30 s and so i began to have a bit of Grey White hair ( just A bit in front). two weeks ago i was at work and had this sudden idea in mind, i am having less Grey hair in my head. after two hours i went to the mirror and i checked:-) i shall add nothing now because i am still gathering evidence for it ( taking Fotos) and when the case is convincing enough i will post it. why i mentioned this is because i am wondering if teh Sub has helped you in physically changing your hair! i know you did care for it more but has the Sub done something more than just encouraging you to care for it!!!!sorry i wrote too Long, but just wanted to share this with you and thank you man for your inspirational Journal. now mind you i am not even excited that i might have less Grey hair , because i have exactly the opposite Problem, everyone thinks i am just 26 !!! and i d love to be judged a bit older:-)

Hey man,
You must be my twin! We sound so much alike. I find the same sort of sales here. Most guys are larger here, smaller sizes get marked down insanely. The downside is because most guys here are larger, most stores will only stock L, XL, XXL. The only places where I can get stuff small enough for me usually is H&M, Zara and Topman. Sometimes The Gap, i can grab something in XS that will fit me. I am not really into name brands, like you, unless we're talking sneakers (Nike, Adidas, Converse), I buy most of my boots from places like Aldo when they're having their 50% off sales.

As far as the sub changing my hair, it is very possible. After experiencing the total life shift that AOS has brought me, I think anything is possible here. I know it certainly is a different texture and colour than it was before.


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - Leo1990 - 06-22-2015

Been thinking of doing different subs. I wonder how AOS plus ASC 4g would be like.


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 08-08-2015

(06-22-2015, 09:23 PM)LeoistheSun Wrote: Been thinking of doing different subs. I wonder how AOS plus ASC 4g would be like.

Try it out, man!


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 08-08-2015

So Im over halfway through AM again. I definitely feel independent as of late. I think this whole subliminal journey has taught me that I need to focus on myself and my own life and to quit worrying about other people and what I can get from them. I no longer "need" women so bad. This is mostly because I am more and more aware of my own value in life. Although now I am a "lone wolf" in the world, I am a shit ton more confident in my own values and thoughts.

The same can be said for a job. I am at the point where I go into interviews and its basically take me or leave me. I know who I am and I am not going to bend or try to qualify myself to you. I am more willing to say "NEXT" and quit worrying and blaming myself "I did this wrong, I did that wrong". Life is too short to worry about other people's hang ups (which job rejections usually center around IME).

Strangers are still staring at me like crazy and I definitely get the vibe that I am different than any other guy out there. I have been getting deeper and deeper into streetwear fashion. Here are some newer pics to show you where I am at right now:
http://imgur.com/v2hV0rf
http://imgur.com/bjD9PgO
http://imgur.com/jhb8jRZ
http://imgur.com/cUWF56n
http://imgur.com/YhdueTY
http://imgur.com/3LcFWjl

No real luck on the dating sites as of late. Ive gotten a few "what do you want from me?/I would never satisfy you/You are prettier than me/You have better hair than me/You have more clothes than me/More fashionable than me" emails.


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - Darkness - 08-08-2015

(08-08-2015, 02:01 PM)justint27 Wrote: So Im over halfway through AM again. I definitely feel independent as of late. I think this whole subliminal journey has taught me that I need to focus on myself and my own life and to quit worrying about other people and what I can get from them. I no longer "need" women so bad. This is mostly because I am more and more aware of my own value in life. Although now I am a "lone wolf" in the world, I am a shit ton more confident in my own values and thoughts.

The same can be said for a job. I am at the point where I go into interviews and its basically take me or leave me. I know who I am and I am not going to bend or try to qualify myself to you. I am more willing to say "NEXT" and quit worrying and blaming myself "I did this wrong, I did that wrong". Life is too short to worry about other people's hang ups (which job rejections usually center around IME).

Strangers are still staring at me like crazy and I definitely get the vibe that I am different than any other guy out there. I have been getting deeper and deeper into streetwear fashion. Here are some newer pics to show you where I am at right now:
http://imgur.com/v2hV0rf
http://imgur.com/bjD9PgO
http://imgur.com/jhb8jRZ
http://imgur.com/cUWF56n
http://imgur.com/YhdueTY
http://imgur.com/3LcFWjl

No real luck on the dating sites as of late. Ive gotten a few "what do you want from me?/I would never satisfy you/You are prettier than me/You have better hair than me/You have more clothes than me/More fashionable than me" emails.

Your aura is on dude


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 08-08-2015

(08-08-2015, 05:25 PM)Darkness Wrote:
(08-08-2015, 02:01 PM)justint27 Wrote: So Im over halfway through AM again. I definitely feel independent as of late. I think this whole subliminal journey has taught me that I need to focus on myself and my own life and to quit worrying about other people and what I can get from them. I no longer "need" women so bad. This is mostly because I am more and more aware of my own value in life. Although now I am a "lone wolf" in the world, I am a shit ton more confident in my own values and thoughts.

The same can be said for a job. I am at the point where I go into interviews and its basically take me or leave me. I know who I am and I am not going to bend or try to qualify myself to you. I am more willing to say "NEXT" and quit worrying and blaming myself "I did this wrong, I did that wrong". Life is too short to worry about other people's hang ups (which job rejections usually center around IME).

Strangers are still staring at me like crazy and I definitely get the vibe that I am different than any other guy out there. I have been getting deeper and deeper into streetwear fashion. Here are some newer pics to show you where I am at right now:
http://imgur.com/v2hV0rf
http://imgur.com/bjD9PgO
http://imgur.com/jhb8jRZ
http://imgur.com/cUWF56n
http://imgur.com/YhdueTY
http://imgur.com/3LcFWjl

No real luck on the dating sites as of late. Ive gotten a few "what do you want from me?/I would never satisfy you/You are prettier than me/You have better hair than me/You have more clothes than me/More fashionable than me" emails.

Your aura is on dude

You think so? I haven't listened to AOS in a few months now. I started AM 5 back in May again to prepare for SM. Although at this point, Im not sure if I want to continue with SM or go off and do another sub, possibly success related.

I do feel like I am on a journey though. When I look at my old photos and see how far I've come and how different I look...it's amazing. Most importantly is how different I feel. My parents actually comment on this every time they see me, that I seem more confident.

There was a definite notice from everyone in my family actually. My parents, regardless of how much better they and the rest of the family think I look and act, give me minor shit about buying clothes, saying I'm wasting money, but that's really their upbringing. I grew up in a typical lower middle class family who saved and spent minimal in fear of my dad losing his job 24/7.

What's funny now is at the family get-togethers to see my older brother still try to rib me, even though he is bald and pudgy now. Never would've seen that coming as a kid...


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - apollolux - 08-08-2015

I think the only thing that irks me about how you've interpreted the motivations of "aura of sexiness" is your choice of hairstyle. I can easily rationalize everything else you've chosen to do and wear (regardless of my own personal opinions on skinny jeans being extremely constrictive for guys), but I so far haven't been able to justify the hair.

Would you be willing to explain how you came to choose your hairstyle, what your feelings and/or thought processes were about that hairstyle being an expression of your sexiness so that we may understand you better?


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 08-09-2015

(08-08-2015, 07:41 PM)apollolux Wrote: I think the only thing that irks me about how you've interpreted the motivations of "aura of sexiness" is your choice of hairstyle. I can easily rationalize everything else you've chosen to do and wear (regardless of my own personal opinions on skinny jeans being extremely constrictive for guys), but I so far haven't been able to justify the hair.

Would you be willing to explain how you came to choose your hairstyle, what your feelings and/or thought processes were about that hairstyle being an expression of your sexiness so that we may understand you better?

Hey man,
My hairstyle developed over a few months. Before I started AOS a girl I had been talking to told me "you should really use some wax or paste in your hair it would look really good". So I figured it's 2013 or whatever, let's get some wax or paste. I had started parting it at that point. Then I came across a picture of David Beckham and started doing a similar hairstyle to him, but I'd cut the sides and back instead of razoring them.

Over time I just started to let go of all these set backs and personal grudges against modern styles that I had been raised on previously. You know, like men can't wear this, men can't do that, it's gay etc. I was raised very much in the idea that clothing and hair weren't a concern for men and to think about them would be gay. You got what you got for birthdays and christmas, you wore what your mommy bought you and you hated shopping.

You see it makes sense I would be into clothes and all that anyways, since I am a musician and am a very artistic person. I began to realize that you could be anyone you wanted to be, just by changing your style. It's sort of like how people like dressing up for Halloween.

Then randomly I came across Robin James on youtube and I loved his quiff hairstyle and he had a bunch of tutorials on his channel. It was very different and I was willing to try it out. I had never gotten so many compliments ever in my entire life until I started wearing my hair in a quiff with the sides and back shaved. I had random strangers stop me telling me how stylish it looked, asking who my barber was and when I revealed that I did my own hair, people would be shocked.

Skinny jeans-that's a common misconception. There is quite a bit of spandex in them and I'd say they are actually more comfortable to wear than baggy or relaxed fit jeans. Not to mention that I am a pretty small guy and relaxed fit or even straight fit jeans make me look like a homeless man. I wear a mixture of slim and skinny actually-I always try on a bunch of different pairs in different sizes and cuts before I buy the ones that look the best.

Another thing that varies is the brand of pants your buying. Some manufacturers use heavier denim than others. I personally prefer denim that's not so heavy and sort of moves along with you. Before I started AOS, I had two pairs of Levi's Slim Straights, so I was already wearing "slim" jeans.

I was wearing Guess and Gap jeans for awhile in the middle part of the AOS experience but have been wearing H&M, Zara and Topman jeans for the last year as they are much cheaper, just as good and fit my body IMO better.

Sorry for the long winded response. I know it's a long read but hopefully it makes sense to you about how powerful this journey has been and the impact it has made on my life. I can't thank Shannon enough.


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - jbdefence - 08-09-2015

(08-08-2015, 02:01 PM)justint27 Wrote: So Im over halfway through AM again. I definitely feel independent as of late. I think this whole subliminal journey has taught me that I need to focus on myself and my own life and to quit worrying about other people and what I can get from them. I no longer "need" women so bad. This is mostly because I am more and more aware of my own value in life. Although now I am a "lone wolf" in the world, I am a shit ton more confident in my own values and thoughts.

The same can be said for a job. I am at the point where I go into interviews and its basically take me or leave me. I know who I am and I am not going to bend or try to qualify myself to you. I am more willing to say "NEXT" and quit worrying and blaming myself "I did this wrong, I did that wrong". Life is too short to worry about other people's hang ups (which job rejections usually center around IME).

Strangers are still staring at me like crazy and I definitely get the vibe that I am different than any other guy out there. I have been getting deeper and deeper into streetwear fashion. Here are some newer pics to show you where I am at right now:
http://imgur.com/v2hV0rf
http://imgur.com/bjD9PgO
http://imgur.com/jhb8jRZ
http://imgur.com/cUWF56n
http://imgur.com/YhdueTY
http://imgur.com/3LcFWjl

No real luck on the dating sites as of late. Ive gotten a few "what do you want from me?/I would never satisfy you/You are prettier than me/You have better hair than me/You have more clothes than me/More fashionable than me" emails.


good to see your changing your look to show how your feeling. constantly moving forward on the outside and within.


RE: AM 5.0+AOS - justint27 - 08-09-2015

(08-09-2015, 06:16 AM)jbdefence Wrote:
(08-08-2015, 02:01 PM)justint27 Wrote: So Im over halfway through AM again. I definitely feel independent as of late. I think this whole subliminal journey has taught me that I need to focus on myself and my own life and to quit worrying about other people and what I can get from them. I no longer "need" women so bad. This is mostly because I am more and more aware of my own value in life. Although now I am a "lone wolf" in the world, I am a shit ton more confident in my own values and thoughts.

The same can be said for a job. I am at the point where I go into interviews and its basically take me or leave me. I know who I am and I am not going to bend or try to qualify myself to you. I am more willing to say "NEXT" and quit worrying and blaming myself "I did this wrong, I did that wrong". Life is too short to worry about other people's hang ups (which job rejections usually center around IME).

Strangers are still staring at me like crazy and I definitely get the vibe that I am different than any other guy out there. I have been getting deeper and deeper into streetwear fashion. Here are some newer pics to show you where I am at right now:
http://imgur.com/v2hV0rf
http://imgur.com/bjD9PgO
http://imgur.com/jhb8jRZ
http://imgur.com/cUWF56n
http://imgur.com/YhdueTY
http://imgur.com/3LcFWjl

No real luck on the dating sites as of late. Ive gotten a few "what do you want from me?/I would never satisfy you/You are prettier than me/You have better hair than me/You have more clothes than me/More fashionable than me" emails.


good to see your changing your look to show how your feeling. constantly moving forward on the outside and within.

Thanks. I am constantly in a state of flux, body, soul and spirit and notice I am more willing to take chances and try new things out. I actually find new things rather exciting these days instead of falling into old habits or doing the same ol' same ol'.

My brother gave me his old bike last month, so I've gotten back into biking, which is something I haven't done since i was 13 years old. I actually really enjoy the feeling of freedom and being alive riding paths or sliding down a large hill. Not to mention the cardio workout you get.

Another year has passed-I am going to be 31 on august 17th. Not looking forward to being older, but am looking forward to seeing my family and spending time with them.