Jake's UMOP - CLOSED!

[Jake2015]

Quick Update

I seem to have decreased sex drive. I dont know if this is UMOP but I havent fapped for almost 3 weeks I think, since the time I became sick and even though I am well now I still havent the desire.

I did lose some sexual desire due to the tindergirl that came over and put me off her so again it could be that.

Or it could a multitude of other things so I wonder if not fapping is anything to do with UMOP or not?

[Jake2015]

Day 41 - Sat 3 Nov - (Day 5 of 7).
Cycle 5 - (3rd out of 5 cycles with me using 5 loops).
Masked Trickling Stream

Sleep cycle is completely messed up and out of sync.

I dont feel motivated or active, the opposite I feel lazy and fed up.

I have a test/exam next week, and I think the sense of not being ready is making me feel like giving up therefore why try, why bother which increases the laziness and decreases the motivation.

My procrastination must have some roots in this of "why bother when I wont be ready in time".

[Jake2015]

update:

So past few weeks have been sad. I lost 3 friendships in 1 day and few days ago I was accused of something I didnt do by fellow students - a kind of mob mentality.

I realised also that since high school I havent actually been respected.

I dont have many friends at all, I meet people and I get on with people and have great associates but respected by a very few number.

Its sad to realise this but this has been the trend I have faced for most of my life.

I hope 1 day when I am executing subs, that I can then heal whatever is wrong with me so that I am both loved but also respected.

sad times

[Jake2015]

Day 42 - Sun 4 Nov - (Day 6 of 7).
Cycle 5 - (3rd out of 5 cycles with me using 5 loops).
Masked Trickling Stream

I missed todays listening so far. I fell asleep before I could set up my phone to play the sub.

I will try to have it playing through my laptop today (as its masked and not US) while im in my living room.

I have 3 things to report:

1) I have not been fapping. I feel I want to but I am not - is this normal?

2) I have terrible sleep again - my cycle is fucked up badly!! didnt sleep till 5-6am lastnight.

3) I have alot of fear - ALOT - around studying for this test I have and im avoiding it!!! With zero motivation it seems.

[Shannon]

Seek the "why" behind your fear.

[Jake2015]

Seek the "why" behind your fear.

I don't know how. I keep asking why and I jump from 1 memory to another that I can remember but no idea why. I could postulate 101 different reasons and events.

[RTBoss]

Seek the "why" behind your fear.

I don't know how. I keep asking why and I jump from 1 memory to another that I can remember but no idea why. I could postulate 101 different reasons and events.

Start a written journal, and keep asking. Write it all out on a daily basis.

[Hatman]

And the idea behind this is for you to eventually arrive at the conclusion that whatever fear you may have is irrational and shouldn't be there in the first place.

[Jake2015]

Thank you @RTBoss and thank you @Hatman

I have a spare notepad around so ill start this today and see what I can achieve. Thank you both and to @Shannon of course.

Appreciate it!

[Jake2015]

Day 42 - Sun 4 Nov - (Day 6 of 7).
Cycle 5 - (3rd out of 5 cycles with me using 5 loops).
Masked Trickling Stream

Update 2: Simply a stressful but very unproductive day too.

I got a headache by the evening and took a mild painkiller which has done nothing for it.

nothing else to share as yet.

[Jake2015]

Day 43 - Mon 5 Nov - (Day 7 of 7).
Cycle 5 - (3rd out of 5 cycles with me using 5 loops).
Masked Trickling Stream

Tomorrow my 2 day break starts, after which my 6th cycle will begin.

I am almost at the half way mark (90days /2 = 45th day) and so far nothing.

I was hoping that by now there would be some progress but nothing that I can put my finger too.

If anyone asked me what is the progress that I need to see as evidence, then to me it would be daily consistent motivation and action. Even if only a little action and a little motivation at first, its still enough to make me realise its working.

The no fapping on DMSI 3.2 1 loop was surprising since to me fapping or not isnt a big deal, even though I would prefer to give myself some rest from it and regain any energy and nutrients lost. So to not fap for a short period of time was enough of an evidence that something was being executed by my subconscious.

I guess I will never know why or how this occurred.

I had the choice of listening to 11 loops or 5 loops. For me the 5 loops was the sensible option since the 11 wouldnt have been maintained. That would be for many many reasons from life itself to unforseen daily obstacles getting in the way. Listening to 11 and failing to listen to 11 would have both nulled the money back guarantee as well as made me feel even more despondent.

I feel however that with 5 loops I should have felt something, however small, atleast a little sign that I can and will execute but so far nothing. I know in the past shannon has said something about my subconscious working against the modelling he performed to help me know what number of loops to do but either way I am not executing again.

I have all these desires, these visions and imaginings of me a go-getter, a goal setter, a goal achiever. Someone such as a city trader in the big apple, someone such as Charlie Sheens character in the first wall street movie, someone that gets up, exercises, eats, gets the work done, fucks, plays, has a social group and all this while maintaining his composure and not getting easily stressed or side tracked from his mission and objectives.

That is just SO NOT ME! and it hurts to realise that im so far away from this image of what I can or want to be.

Its also scary. I will admit this realisation, that doing or behaving this way brings the fears of being over worked, not having fun, being boring, being monotonous, not having a social life, or a life of much, not being able to live life, or simply just becoming a mean guy which is usually how these traders are shown to be.

I just want to be able to execute these subs because I do see the potential in them.

I dont know how many here execute or how many fail to. It sometimes seems as if the vat majority fail to execute whereas the minority execute only a little.

Now we are at a stage where H&C didnt quite do the job intended which also explains to me how the previous subs didnt work on me in an obvious way perhaps.

All I can now say is that we are entering a new phase, the FRM phase.

I dont know how many got great results from FRM v2. I feel its the same few that got it from H&C. Therefore can FRMv3 really do what we all hope it will..i dont know.

Im just rambling and should stop for now.

so back to my update... woke up with a headache, taken a pain killer. Have a test tomorrow and dont feel like studying for it.


Thats what I seem to feel, there are days of motivation, days of when I want to do things and then there are those days when I dont want to do anything, im bored, im just staying in, watching movies, eating and being bored with life.

[Zane]

Jake, I think you should give USLM3 with FRM V3 a shot. After getting doing 90 days of UMOP.

[Jake2015]

Jake, I think you should give USLM3 with FRM V3 a shot. After getting doing 90 days of UMOP.

Hey bro. Thanks. The thing is soon UMOP2 with FRM3 will be released and immediately next after USLM3.

So it's better I do UMOP2 as soon as it's out.

After the 90days if I get results I'll stay on.

If I don't the question will be which sub to then do. 3.3 or USLM3 or LTU2?

[Zane]

Jake, I think you should give USLM3 with FRM V3 a shot. After getting doing 90 days of UMOP.

Hey bro. Thanks. The thing is soon UMOP2 with FRM3 will be released and immediately next after USLM3.

So it's better I do UMOP2 as soon as it's out.

After the 90days if I get results I'll stay on.

If I don't the question will be which sub to then do. 3.3 or USLM3 or LTU2?

I am sure we will get UMOP3 as an update. I just wanted you to enjoy the USLM3.. After all the FRM is what we have been waiting for to kill the fear. Root of all problems.