or "LionKing breaks free" :P
I felt that I needed a boost in confidence, motivation, drive and such, so I thought of ASC. But I like the OF script a lot more, and I like the idea of putting less "effort" into being confident, i.e. being confident as a natural consequence of having no fear fear/inhibition. Just a few journals, but each one is positive. So I'm testing it out.
I'm not really into journaling atm, but I thought it'll be interesting to see how strong of an effect OF produces after AM6->SM3->AM6. How long I run this for will depend on how powerfully it affects me (hoping for big impact per time invested, vs. the multi stages).
Towards the end of AM6 r.2 I just started ignoring pretty much everyone. But I know I do care what they think, because I found it hard to get out of that ignoring mode. Also, I was having negative thoughts about people and I think that's because I expected them to have negative (or not positive enough) thoughts about me, so I just beat them to it. That could be fear-based, in part at least. Also stress-based, because I've had a lot of that lately. Pushing for things to happen in my work life.
I might want to try 4-8 hours of another 4G with OF at some point, but I'll run it solo for now to see how I respond to it. For efficiency too. Anyway, options:
-US or Positive thinking & positive attitude: good "foundationals"
-BIABW(S): OF with attraction covers a lot of ground, so I think I'd have less of a hurry to move on towards SM/WM and I could run these for longer
-Overcome Procrastination or UM: for productivity
As a goal, let's say I'm aiming for "no separation between me & others". Or "no wall between me & what I want to do", or "no hiding, no worry". Something like that. More specifically also:
-fear of failure, perfectionism
-fear of having too low energy (and not using up my energy on stress)
-calmly being, and holding, the center of attention in bigger groups / presentations
-being able to "approach" women through eye contact, without staring (i.e. non-forcefully) at random places. A halv approach. For some reason I feel this is often harder than a full approach.
-getting to approaching again; casually and not worrying about it
-going for new experiences more aggressively
-----------------------------------------------------------
Day 5
Last night was the first night I had multiple, clearly OF-induced dreams. I woke up from a dream where my mother had been trying to guilt trip me hard on something. Then I got up to get some water and realized I had to watch for every corner and shadow when I went into a new room.. I knew this was OF's doing and I knew there's no one in my house, but I was SURE my mind's playing a trick on me - that I'm still asleep and any second now I'm gonna see someone jumping at me with a knife and I'll have the scare of my life! Its a weird feeling to be afraid of the dark again, lol. I laid down, just felt it for some time. Then got bored of it and went through the Sedona questions a few times, let it go and relaxed and smiled again. Had some other dreams afterwards, too.
I'm starting on some old hobbies again right now and I was feeling very comfortable & light at 1st practice at a new venue. Nothing really out the ordinary yet, I've been feeling pretty good. Getting a lot attention because I'm making much more eye contact on the street. That probably placebo, but I'll take it happily :)
I felt that I needed a boost in confidence, motivation, drive and such, so I thought of ASC. But I like the OF script a lot more, and I like the idea of putting less "effort" into being confident, i.e. being confident as a natural consequence of having no fear fear/inhibition. Just a few journals, but each one is positive. So I'm testing it out.
I'm not really into journaling atm, but I thought it'll be interesting to see how strong of an effect OF produces after AM6->SM3->AM6. How long I run this for will depend on how powerfully it affects me (hoping for big impact per time invested, vs. the multi stages).
Towards the end of AM6 r.2 I just started ignoring pretty much everyone. But I know I do care what they think, because I found it hard to get out of that ignoring mode. Also, I was having negative thoughts about people and I think that's because I expected them to have negative (or not positive enough) thoughts about me, so I just beat them to it. That could be fear-based, in part at least. Also stress-based, because I've had a lot of that lately. Pushing for things to happen in my work life.
I might want to try 4-8 hours of another 4G with OF at some point, but I'll run it solo for now to see how I respond to it. For efficiency too. Anyway, options:
-US or Positive thinking & positive attitude: good "foundationals"
-BIABW(S): OF with attraction covers a lot of ground, so I think I'd have less of a hurry to move on towards SM/WM and I could run these for longer
-Overcome Procrastination or UM: for productivity
As a goal, let's say I'm aiming for "no separation between me & others". Or "no wall between me & what I want to do", or "no hiding, no worry". Something like that. More specifically also:
-fear of failure, perfectionism
-fear of having too low energy (and not using up my energy on stress)
-calmly being, and holding, the center of attention in bigger groups / presentations
-being able to "approach" women through eye contact, without staring (i.e. non-forcefully) at random places. A halv approach. For some reason I feel this is often harder than a full approach.
-getting to approaching again; casually and not worrying about it
-going for new experiences more aggressively
-----------------------------------------------------------
Day 5
Last night was the first night I had multiple, clearly OF-induced dreams. I woke up from a dream where my mother had been trying to guilt trip me hard on something. Then I got up to get some water and realized I had to watch for every corner and shadow when I went into a new room.. I knew this was OF's doing and I knew there's no one in my house, but I was SURE my mind's playing a trick on me - that I'm still asleep and any second now I'm gonna see someone jumping at me with a knife and I'll have the scare of my life! Its a weird feeling to be afraid of the dark again, lol. I laid down, just felt it for some time. Then got bored of it and went through the Sedona questions a few times, let it go and relaxed and smiled again. Had some other dreams afterwards, too.
I'm starting on some old hobbies again right now and I was feeling very comfortable & light at 1st practice at a new venue. Nothing really out the ordinary yet, I've been feeling pretty good. Getting a lot attention because I'm making much more eye contact on the street. That probably placebo, but I'll take it happily :)
Thoughts, opinions and beliefs subject to change without prior notice.
Have a great one, LK.
