01-03-2016, 01:04 PM
Maybe. I'm going to do Anger Management here, shortly, as I picked it up during the sale.
As for my thoughts, I have dark thoughts that I only control through spiritual practice. I feel very very deeply. When crossed, it's not good. My mother-in-law for instance. I borderline hate her. I used to love her, then she royally f*cked over my wife - it affected my whole family as a result. Looong story. Anyway, she's never apologized to me, and likely feels she never did anything wrong. She's made "amends" with my wife, and while my wife has forgiven her, I can't help but feel annoyed by literally everything about her. The way she talks, laughs, eats, and treats my sister-in-law differently than my wife - it all irks me. If I told her what I think of her, she'd cry for days. I can be that mean...I work on forgiving her all the time, but I get nowhere. She crossed some kind of line my subconscious won't let go of.
My wife lined up a birthday trip for me, and invited her. Now, I don't even want to go. She didn't ask me if that was ok, and she knows I don't care for her mother. It hurts my wife that I don't like her, and that I can't forgive her, but I just feel like I can't help it. Anyway, if I felt the compulsion to tell her how I feel about everything...IDK, maybe it'd help if I could say how I felt in a kind way - but I don't think it'd come out too kind. I feel like I just need to get over it internally, on my own.
And that's only one example...
As for my thoughts, I have dark thoughts that I only control through spiritual practice. I feel very very deeply. When crossed, it's not good. My mother-in-law for instance. I borderline hate her. I used to love her, then she royally f*cked over my wife - it affected my whole family as a result. Looong story. Anyway, she's never apologized to me, and likely feels she never did anything wrong. She's made "amends" with my wife, and while my wife has forgiven her, I can't help but feel annoyed by literally everything about her. The way she talks, laughs, eats, and treats my sister-in-law differently than my wife - it all irks me. If I told her what I think of her, she'd cry for days. I can be that mean...I work on forgiving her all the time, but I get nowhere. She crossed some kind of line my subconscious won't let go of.
My wife lined up a birthday trip for me, and invited her. Now, I don't even want to go. She didn't ask me if that was ok, and she knows I don't care for her mother. It hurts my wife that I don't like her, and that I can't forgive her, but I just feel like I can't help it. Anyway, if I felt the compulsion to tell her how I feel about everything...IDK, maybe it'd help if I could say how I felt in a kind way - but I don't think it'd come out too kind. I feel like I just need to get over it internally, on my own.
And that's only one example...
