Oh Wow, I didn't expect to see so many posts just after one day! Thanks everyone for the contribution. (or questions for Shannon)
Anyway, here's my second post.
Day 2, amount of listening approximately 9.5 hours (7 hours during the sleep, and the rest spread out during the day.)
Well, I remember coming back and reading Shannon's suggestion about the volume. Thus, I tried to raise the volume just a bit for my sleep. Sadly, that bothered me too much that I had to go back to the barely audible range.
I suppose what Shannon's trying to say was to put the volume as high as possible that is comfortable to listen to. You may correct me if my assumption is wrong.
I only got 7 hours of sleep, because I forgot that I made an appointment for a haircut today; it was my phone's reminder that woke me up. Luckily I was able to wake up in time to make it for the appointment. What I noticed today was that I was more tired to wake up than when I didn't use the sub. (Well, I gotta admit, I have difficulty waking up in the morning, and I need quite a lot of time to get myself ready. Given that I used the sub and was more tired, I give myself credit for waking up in time and making it to the appointment, considering that my alarm wasn't even set up properly. Perhaps, my next sub will be sleep aid sets.) Yet, the fatigue from the sub wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. What I also noticed during the day was that once I took shower, and started to get active, my fatigue was gone. However, I'm now quite tired, and I usually don't get tired at this time, even during the week, when I had 4 hours of sleep on average due to school works. It's only been 2 days so far, so I will need to see more about the fatigue.
The next thing I noticed was about dream. I don't normally have a dream, which I think I mentioned in my previous post, but I had one, although I can't recall very clear picture. (which is very typical of me) However, what I remember though is that a super glamorous girl, quite busty, at least D or DD cup, yet slim, was riding me. I can't recall what her hair color was, maybe brunette, or blonde, but I do remember that she was either latina or white. (I can't quite recall if she had a pale skin or tanned one, but I am leaning towards that the girl had tanned skin. I could be wrong though) I do also remember that this dream was quite short. What was different from the image I had last time was that I had this dream just before waking up. Oh well, I might have longer version if it wasn't for the reminder. Unfortunately, I don't seem to have any memory on the girl's face. I wonder if I am not supposed to see the girl's face yet.
What was also interesting about this dream was that it was different from my ideas about desirable girl/lover. As far as the physical characteristics go, I had an idea that my ideal girl would have B or C, not DD, although I like DD as well. And my images of the girl in my conscious mind had a bit lighter skin color. Perhaps, my subconscious has different idea about my perfect lover than the ideas in my conscious mind. Maybe what the sub was trying to do was to clarify the image about the perfect girl? Who knows what the dream meant. :angel: But I'm pretty sure that the dream was caused by the sub since the dream was quite sexual in nature. Whatever the differences in the subconscious from the conscious mind might be, I would be happy as long as I manifest the perfect lover.
Third thing I noticed was change in my thoughts/attitude and behavior. I'm an introvert, and I like to stay inside my apartment, doing school work, some research, reading things online, watching movies, and etc... (Luckily though, I am quite slim, even when I'm lazy about going outside.)
So what would have been my normal routine would have been that I would come back to my apartment, get lunch, and stay there, doing whatever I would do. Yet, this wasn't the case. I had to get my bike's tire inflated, and there is a good bike shop 20 mins from my place on walk. My mind was fighting, as I could get the bike pump that is about the same price on Amazon. My mind was telling me that I don't need to get the pump today as the forecast was telling that there is going to be a storm tomorrow, so just get the pump from Amazon. Yet, there was another side of my mind, which was telling me that the day was nice outside, - the weather was great - and I didn't have many things to do other than a bit of homework and some readings. It was also telling me that I needed to ask some questions about my bike, and I could grab bubble teas on the way. And you know what, my second half of the mind won, so I came home, got lunch, got changed, and left to get to the bike shop. And of course, I stopped by at the tea place. This would have normally be a case that the first part of my mind would have obliterated the second half.
There was another battle going on in my mind after I came back from the bike shop, and I put some air in the tire. The battle was similar that my mind was fighting about whether to have dinner inside as there was food or go outside. It was an easy win for the second half, using similar logic of nice day and having storm coming for a few days, which will prevent me from going anywhere, since I don't have a car. However, what was more interesting was in the next battle. So the next battle in my mind was the place to eat. I quickly came to two choices. One was Buffalo Wild Wings, and the other one was a local kebab restaurant. One side of my mind was telling me that I should go to BWW as BWW is better suited to mingle with new people, who are around my age. (Although the kebab place has many students coming in, except that the set up makes it more difficult to interact with new students when compared to BWW.) The other argument for BWW was that I had a $5 off coupon from the survey I completed. The other side of the argument was that it was telling me that the BWW is not that healthy compared to the kebab place, in which I can get more vegetables, making my diet more balanced. The mind was telling me that I need to be building my shape and become healthier for my future perfect lover. It also told me that the time is still there, and I could just use the coupon and get to BWW after my class, which I may decide to invite someone, and that it made an argument that it would work out better. Since the second one made more sense, I took that one and go. All of these were somewhat absent when I was lazy, or before using the sub, and I would not make this much of active argument for my choices in my mind. Yet, it did, and it was making me to always push for some better alternatives, made me go out more, and got me to prepare and make myself better for the future lover. Pretty impressive.
The third thing about change in my mind is in the planning. I bought tons of books for reading during the summer, and I also have GRE prep to do. I originally thought that I would do most of these at my home. Now, my mind is thinking about what would be the best place that is quiet for me to do these things. What is quite shocking is that I have experienced that doing these outside of my place makes it more challenging for me to get any of them done; as I mentioned I am super sensitive and that combined with ADD, makes it nearly impossible to get anything done, if I am at a coffee shop (the music, constant people moving in and out), or at a library, though library has a potential to be better. What is funny is that now I am actively seeking that there's got to be a public place where I can get all of them done efficiently, while helping me meet new people. The mind has lately telling me that I can do all of these efficiently. Which is quite remarkable, as my mind has always been quite opposite, when it comes to this matter, due to my terrible failures in the public places before. I will have to see how this will play out though.
And the very last thing I noticed from using the sub other than the dream and change inside of me, is the change in people's behavior. The first one occurred when I was going to get the bike pump. I was walking there and a guy was coming from the opposite direction. This guy looked me like he's never seen a man like me in the past before. He literally turned his head, while his facial expression was like "OMG, where did this awesome (or handsome) guy come from?" I don't know maybe he had fallen for me at the first sight? This was the feeling I got when I was passing by. Perhaps, I am delusional about this, but I've never had a look from a guy like that before. I don't know if this is sub's doing, and if it is the sub, that'd be weird, as I'm heterosexual. Or maybe, my haircut was just damn great. LOL
The second one was when I was coming back from a drugstore, which I stopped by after I finished my dinner. (I actually passed by my house to get the stuff from the store, which again my mind told me to stay outside more and grab the stuff from the store, even though it literally was on the opposite direction from the restaurant and my house was clearly on a way there.) So when I was coming back from the store, I encountered a girl on a ride hailing at me. Then shortly later, a second one came by and hailed at me. Well, I've been hailed by guys on a ride in the past, but not girls. I wonder if the sub also causes people to react differently.
And generally, I notice that people were making longer eye contact with me, or they would look at me longer, by 1~2 seconds longer. This was more true if the person was a woman, whose look would be 7+/10. Perhaps this is again the sub's changing people's behavior around me, or it could be like what Shannon wrote, affecting my awareness.
Day two only, and I'm already starting to see the changes. I didn't expect to see the changes (although they may not be that big) happening this fast. I'm excited to see what more I will see from this sub.
At the same time I hope that the changes would not cost my academics or my academic plan. (Due to fatigue, or my mind telling me to do different things. But I have to say my worries are lessened as I see that what my mind is ultimately doing is telling me to make myself better for the perfect lover, which in my opinion also includes my excellent academic standing as well as other things.)
Again thank you guys for posting on my journal, and those of you who read this long post, I thank and congratulate you.
Anyway, here's my second post.
Day 2, amount of listening approximately 9.5 hours (7 hours during the sleep, and the rest spread out during the day.)
Well, I remember coming back and reading Shannon's suggestion about the volume. Thus, I tried to raise the volume just a bit for my sleep. Sadly, that bothered me too much that I had to go back to the barely audible range.
I suppose what Shannon's trying to say was to put the volume as high as possible that is comfortable to listen to. You may correct me if my assumption is wrong.I only got 7 hours of sleep, because I forgot that I made an appointment for a haircut today; it was my phone's reminder that woke me up. Luckily I was able to wake up in time to make it for the appointment. What I noticed today was that I was more tired to wake up than when I didn't use the sub. (Well, I gotta admit, I have difficulty waking up in the morning, and I need quite a lot of time to get myself ready. Given that I used the sub and was more tired, I give myself credit for waking up in time and making it to the appointment, considering that my alarm wasn't even set up properly. Perhaps, my next sub will be sleep aid sets.) Yet, the fatigue from the sub wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. What I also noticed during the day was that once I took shower, and started to get active, my fatigue was gone. However, I'm now quite tired, and I usually don't get tired at this time, even during the week, when I had 4 hours of sleep on average due to school works. It's only been 2 days so far, so I will need to see more about the fatigue.
The next thing I noticed was about dream. I don't normally have a dream, which I think I mentioned in my previous post, but I had one, although I can't recall very clear picture. (which is very typical of me) However, what I remember though is that a super glamorous girl, quite busty, at least D or DD cup, yet slim, was riding me. I can't recall what her hair color was, maybe brunette, or blonde, but I do remember that she was either latina or white. (I can't quite recall if she had a pale skin or tanned one, but I am leaning towards that the girl had tanned skin. I could be wrong though) I do also remember that this dream was quite short. What was different from the image I had last time was that I had this dream just before waking up. Oh well, I might have longer version if it wasn't for the reminder. Unfortunately, I don't seem to have any memory on the girl's face. I wonder if I am not supposed to see the girl's face yet.
What was also interesting about this dream was that it was different from my ideas about desirable girl/lover. As far as the physical characteristics go, I had an idea that my ideal girl would have B or C, not DD, although I like DD as well. And my images of the girl in my conscious mind had a bit lighter skin color. Perhaps, my subconscious has different idea about my perfect lover than the ideas in my conscious mind. Maybe what the sub was trying to do was to clarify the image about the perfect girl? Who knows what the dream meant. :angel: But I'm pretty sure that the dream was caused by the sub since the dream was quite sexual in nature. Whatever the differences in the subconscious from the conscious mind might be, I would be happy as long as I manifest the perfect lover.
Third thing I noticed was change in my thoughts/attitude and behavior. I'm an introvert, and I like to stay inside my apartment, doing school work, some research, reading things online, watching movies, and etc... (Luckily though, I am quite slim, even when I'm lazy about going outside.)
So what would have been my normal routine would have been that I would come back to my apartment, get lunch, and stay there, doing whatever I would do. Yet, this wasn't the case. I had to get my bike's tire inflated, and there is a good bike shop 20 mins from my place on walk. My mind was fighting, as I could get the bike pump that is about the same price on Amazon. My mind was telling me that I don't need to get the pump today as the forecast was telling that there is going to be a storm tomorrow, so just get the pump from Amazon. Yet, there was another side of my mind, which was telling me that the day was nice outside, - the weather was great - and I didn't have many things to do other than a bit of homework and some readings. It was also telling me that I needed to ask some questions about my bike, and I could grab bubble teas on the way. And you know what, my second half of the mind won, so I came home, got lunch, got changed, and left to get to the bike shop. And of course, I stopped by at the tea place. This would have normally be a case that the first part of my mind would have obliterated the second half.
There was another battle going on in my mind after I came back from the bike shop, and I put some air in the tire. The battle was similar that my mind was fighting about whether to have dinner inside as there was food or go outside. It was an easy win for the second half, using similar logic of nice day and having storm coming for a few days, which will prevent me from going anywhere, since I don't have a car. However, what was more interesting was in the next battle. So the next battle in my mind was the place to eat. I quickly came to two choices. One was Buffalo Wild Wings, and the other one was a local kebab restaurant. One side of my mind was telling me that I should go to BWW as BWW is better suited to mingle with new people, who are around my age. (Although the kebab place has many students coming in, except that the set up makes it more difficult to interact with new students when compared to BWW.) The other argument for BWW was that I had a $5 off coupon from the survey I completed. The other side of the argument was that it was telling me that the BWW is not that healthy compared to the kebab place, in which I can get more vegetables, making my diet more balanced. The mind was telling me that I need to be building my shape and become healthier for my future perfect lover. It also told me that the time is still there, and I could just use the coupon and get to BWW after my class, which I may decide to invite someone, and that it made an argument that it would work out better. Since the second one made more sense, I took that one and go. All of these were somewhat absent when I was lazy, or before using the sub, and I would not make this much of active argument for my choices in my mind. Yet, it did, and it was making me to always push for some better alternatives, made me go out more, and got me to prepare and make myself better for the future lover. Pretty impressive.
The third thing about change in my mind is in the planning. I bought tons of books for reading during the summer, and I also have GRE prep to do. I originally thought that I would do most of these at my home. Now, my mind is thinking about what would be the best place that is quiet for me to do these things. What is quite shocking is that I have experienced that doing these outside of my place makes it more challenging for me to get any of them done; as I mentioned I am super sensitive and that combined with ADD, makes it nearly impossible to get anything done, if I am at a coffee shop (the music, constant people moving in and out), or at a library, though library has a potential to be better. What is funny is that now I am actively seeking that there's got to be a public place where I can get all of them done efficiently, while helping me meet new people. The mind has lately telling me that I can do all of these efficiently. Which is quite remarkable, as my mind has always been quite opposite, when it comes to this matter, due to my terrible failures in the public places before. I will have to see how this will play out though.
And the very last thing I noticed from using the sub other than the dream and change inside of me, is the change in people's behavior. The first one occurred when I was going to get the bike pump. I was walking there and a guy was coming from the opposite direction. This guy looked me like he's never seen a man like me in the past before. He literally turned his head, while his facial expression was like "OMG, where did this awesome (or handsome) guy come from?" I don't know maybe he had fallen for me at the first sight? This was the feeling I got when I was passing by. Perhaps, I am delusional about this, but I've never had a look from a guy like that before. I don't know if this is sub's doing, and if it is the sub, that'd be weird, as I'm heterosexual. Or maybe, my haircut was just damn great. LOL
The second one was when I was coming back from a drugstore, which I stopped by after I finished my dinner. (I actually passed by my house to get the stuff from the store, which again my mind told me to stay outside more and grab the stuff from the store, even though it literally was on the opposite direction from the restaurant and my house was clearly on a way there.) So when I was coming back from the store, I encountered a girl on a ride hailing at me. Then shortly later, a second one came by and hailed at me. Well, I've been hailed by guys on a ride in the past, but not girls. I wonder if the sub also causes people to react differently.
And generally, I notice that people were making longer eye contact with me, or they would look at me longer, by 1~2 seconds longer. This was more true if the person was a woman, whose look would be 7+/10. Perhaps this is again the sub's changing people's behavior around me, or it could be like what Shannon wrote, affecting my awareness.
Day two only, and I'm already starting to see the changes. I didn't expect to see the changes (although they may not be that big) happening this fast. I'm excited to see what more I will see from this sub.
At the same time I hope that the changes would not cost my academics or my academic plan. (Due to fatigue, or my mind telling me to do different things. But I have to say my worries are lessened as I see that what my mind is ultimately doing is telling me to make myself better for the perfect lover, which in my opinion also includes my excellent academic standing as well as other things.)
Again thank you guys for posting on my journal, and those of you who read this long post, I thank and congratulate you.
