Smoking sub-take 3-HST-take 1

[Patti]

I have been living a nightmare since my last post, but hey I haven’t smoked! It’s not been easy but I do feel as if there’s an invisible wall of will power around me. And I’ve never felt anything close to what I would describe as will power before. All I keep thinking is that I just want to finish the program. Somewhere off in my distant thoughts I hear, if you want to smoke after you run through the program, well than you weren’t ready to quit. But, I also hear that I probably won’t want to. I’ve always thought I wanted to be just social smoker, so that I could smoke when I felt I really needed to like now, but I know me and I could never do that. Once I smoke one, I’d be right back to smoking all the time. I am looking forward to being done with this program and moving onto other area’s of my life I could use some help.

I have noticed that my sense of smell is getting stronger. Just walking from my house to my car, I will often catch a scent of something fragrant in the air that’s usually faint but more noticeable now.

I also noticed yesterday that I not breathing as hard as I used too. For some reason we always seem to power walk from the Winnie to the stadium and back for the football games and I don’t really ever remember it being hard or me being out of breath but yesterday it just seemed it was made apparent to me that it was easier to talk as I was walking quickly.

I was wondering if any of the exercise enthusiasts on this forum have heard koko fit club? I just saw that we have one near us and to me, it seems to be somewhere between going to a gym and hiring a personal trainer. For me, I need variety because I get so bored with exercise. If anyone knows of this company and has any thoughts, I’d be very interested in hearing them. I have read the website but I always go more on word of mouth.