01-23-2024, 07:31 AM
Day 124,
I'm becoming more squeamish, acutely sensitive to my own humanness and the humanness of others.
Our tissues tear and fail us, our bones can snap suddenly under an unusual stress, our constitutions are imperfect. We have one shot at life and things can go south all of a sudden, with few people who can truly save you. If you're lucky, you're surrounded by people who can help you.
This is leading me to lean back from my edge, especially in my grappling. Normally, I'm game for a lot of things, but I'm now not as much.
A few years ago, I was full of the energy needed to travel and explore the world around me; now, I don't see the use. More specifically, the upside seems smaller, and the downside (the effort required and costs) seems much greater.
I'm becoming more squeamish, acutely sensitive to my own humanness and the humanness of others.
Our tissues tear and fail us, our bones can snap suddenly under an unusual stress, our constitutions are imperfect. We have one shot at life and things can go south all of a sudden, with few people who can truly save you. If you're lucky, you're surrounded by people who can help you.
This is leading me to lean back from my edge, especially in my grappling. Normally, I'm game for a lot of things, but I'm now not as much.
A few years ago, I was full of the energy needed to travel and explore the world around me; now, I don't see the use. More specifically, the upside seems smaller, and the downside (the effort required and costs) seems much greater.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
