10-24-2021, 01:31 PM
S2 Day 12
After the fall on my butt I felt less motivated to go out but what else would I spend my weekend nights on. Besides I like going out.
Friday felt 7/10 feeling of motivation.
Saturday 2-3/10 - didn't feel it at all.. also exhausted from last nights outing
Friday met different girls. Young 19 yo's and start 30's.
Very interesting night. I had a lot of energy and spent a lot of energy. Missed a kiss one young one, could have taken another home but she was not my type.
I often find girls becoming more attractive after I start interacting with them. Before interaction, most girls are soso.
Saturday feeling shitty to go out. What helped was I told myself I will reward myself on Sunday with the last episode of SG. Excited to watch it after this update post!
Felt disconnected with the environment. After some walking and sipping my soda, I forced myself to open 3 girls sitting. Some guys were sitting near them, had been for a while and was motioning to each other to talk with them. I just went in.
It was awkward and I could hear the two guys laughing out loud. Made me realize that reality is, some are action takers, some are observers who judge because they are too chicken to do it. So a form of jealousy/envy is not new in this world. Sometimes you just forget it exists.
After the 3 girls, I felt better but still not social. I didn't feel social throughout the outing. Talked to a few other girls.. nothing interesting.. did it mostly to get into a different state and at the end I just felt f**k it. Went to the crowded dancefloor and just focused on feeling better and moved to the music. After a few songs, two girls and a guy comes near me. Suddenly guy isn't there anymore and these two girls focus on me.
Trying to pump my state. Partying mood, yelling. Actually a bit dominant.
One girl is very judgmental and speaking what she thinks with no barriers. The other focus a lot on me and at a point she's like wake up!! She saw I was a little too relaxed or exhausted. Crazy she would be into me I guess.
We moved a bit on dancefloor and soon she made herself so available to me that you had to be a complete idiot to not notice she wanted me to take her. I had the thought of grabbing her, kissing her and leave.
The combination of feeling as I did and her not being my type although she was hot, made me think too much about it and not do it. Eventually they left.
It is the strangest thing.. because these kind of girls never approach me.. and also so aggressive and forward towards me.
Going out a lot you will experience new things all the time. What a beautiful time we live in where this can be a lifestyle option.
Btw. I read a lot and just that very Saturday night when driving home, I learned a lesson for life.
"You can decide that the process/effort in an activity is the reward in of itself".
That's how you maintain a long term healthy motivation and desire to keep doing the activity. Instead of thinking that the end result is the reward,
-LM
After the fall on my butt I felt less motivated to go out but what else would I spend my weekend nights on. Besides I like going out.
Friday felt 7/10 feeling of motivation.
Saturday 2-3/10 - didn't feel it at all.. also exhausted from last nights outing
Friday met different girls. Young 19 yo's and start 30's.
Very interesting night. I had a lot of energy and spent a lot of energy. Missed a kiss one young one, could have taken another home but she was not my type.
I often find girls becoming more attractive after I start interacting with them. Before interaction, most girls are soso.
Saturday feeling shitty to go out. What helped was I told myself I will reward myself on Sunday with the last episode of SG. Excited to watch it after this update post!
Felt disconnected with the environment. After some walking and sipping my soda, I forced myself to open 3 girls sitting. Some guys were sitting near them, had been for a while and was motioning to each other to talk with them. I just went in.
It was awkward and I could hear the two guys laughing out loud. Made me realize that reality is, some are action takers, some are observers who judge because they are too chicken to do it. So a form of jealousy/envy is not new in this world. Sometimes you just forget it exists.
After the 3 girls, I felt better but still not social. I didn't feel social throughout the outing. Talked to a few other girls.. nothing interesting.. did it mostly to get into a different state and at the end I just felt f**k it. Went to the crowded dancefloor and just focused on feeling better and moved to the music. After a few songs, two girls and a guy comes near me. Suddenly guy isn't there anymore and these two girls focus on me.
Trying to pump my state. Partying mood, yelling. Actually a bit dominant.
One girl is very judgmental and speaking what she thinks with no barriers. The other focus a lot on me and at a point she's like wake up!! She saw I was a little too relaxed or exhausted. Crazy she would be into me I guess.
We moved a bit on dancefloor and soon she made herself so available to me that you had to be a complete idiot to not notice she wanted me to take her. I had the thought of grabbing her, kissing her and leave.
The combination of feeling as I did and her not being my type although she was hot, made me think too much about it and not do it. Eventually they left.
It is the strangest thing.. because these kind of girls never approach me.. and also so aggressive and forward towards me.
Going out a lot you will experience new things all the time. What a beautiful time we live in where this can be a lifestyle option.
Btw. I read a lot and just that very Saturday night when driving home, I learned a lesson for life.
"You can decide that the process/effort in an activity is the reward in of itself".
That's how you maintain a long term healthy motivation and desire to keep doing the activity. Instead of thinking that the end result is the reward,
-LM
1. Do whatever you want.. risk whatever your gut tells you because.. you know you have good intentions.
2. Pressure forms the man.
3. Clarity gives space for better decisions.
