08-02-2021, 07:34 AM
Day 32
Anxiety is not a joke. I'd love to be just done with moving out but I won't be for some time yet. Sadly due to dimensional requirements I cannot simply buy new furniture at Ikea so I had to order furniture online and I have no idea how long this will take. I hope it will arrive this week but there is no way of knowing. I fear I make bad decisions under the pressure of time and it's hard for me to focus on other stuff. Also I hate the idea that I will have to get used to completely new environment. Strangely I don't have such fears about my new job, but I'm so used to my living space that changing it really scares the hell out of me.
I wish I would care less about it and just let it go but I cannot. I overthink everything, as usual. I just wanna be done with it. Thankfully I see a lot of positives about moving and I think the reason why I react so harshly to the situations is because I won't be able to continue the habits I've developed while living alone. Truth is I cannot live alone if I want to keep my sanity in check in the long run.
You may wonder how I react to the sub in such situation? Badly. I straight up forget about running it and when I do I want it to just stop. I seem to be more decisive while or shortly after listening so that's a plus.
Anxiety is not a joke. I'd love to be just done with moving out but I won't be for some time yet. Sadly due to dimensional requirements I cannot simply buy new furniture at Ikea so I had to order furniture online and I have no idea how long this will take. I hope it will arrive this week but there is no way of knowing. I fear I make bad decisions under the pressure of time and it's hard for me to focus on other stuff. Also I hate the idea that I will have to get used to completely new environment. Strangely I don't have such fears about my new job, but I'm so used to my living space that changing it really scares the hell out of me.
I wish I would care less about it and just let it go but I cannot. I overthink everything, as usual. I just wanna be done with it. Thankfully I see a lot of positives about moving and I think the reason why I react so harshly to the situations is because I won't be able to continue the habits I've developed while living alone. Truth is I cannot live alone if I want to keep my sanity in check in the long run.
You may wonder how I react to the sub in such situation? Badly. I straight up forget about running it and when I do I want it to just stop. I seem to be more decisive while or shortly after listening so that's a plus.
For not by numbers of men, nor by measure of body, but by valor of soul is war to be decided.
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
