07-20-2019, 04:25 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-20-2019, 04:27 PM by ResJudicata.)
Day 139
This whole week has been tiring. I can’t tell if it’s resistance, me trying to change my sleep schedule in case I get that job I want, or me mentally using every scrap of energy to ensure luck plays out such that I get that job I REALLY want. I’ve been chasing that job for months and that interview with the people I’d actually be working under just made me want it more.
On a different note, last Sunday we went to check out a place we’d checked before about a dog they had shown on their website. We fell in love quickly and brought her home Wednesday. If someone told me finding this dog was the luck module, I’d believe them. She’s not perfect but calm and loving and just so good. She’s helping me a lot more mentally than I originally thought she would. I’m still crossing my fingers about the job. They’re supposed to get back to me either way this week.
Another thing I need to talk about is my brother. I know I’m not at a good place in my life or at least it feels that way to me (without a job for over a year, staying at my parent’s house (my parents are amazing, awesome, I owe them so much and I love them), I’m single (partially because I don’t feel like I’m at a good place mentally and emotionally and partially because I don’t know where to meet people locally),and I don’t have a lot of social contacts (partly by choice since I prefer a few close friends rather than many acquaintances plus not a party person)) and my brother just keeps subtlety insulting me and insulting me in so many ways that I’m just getting tired of it. I don’t want to cause a scene but it’s to the point where I’m just thinking my brother is a toxic person to be around, for me. Partially, I think I’m writing this to vent and process and probably also to finalize a decision of what to do in my mind. Oh well, I’ll just have to deal for now. In the long run, I don’t know what I’ll do. I’m alone in the house right now, so I’ll just enjoy some time with the good doggy.
This whole week has been tiring. I can’t tell if it’s resistance, me trying to change my sleep schedule in case I get that job I want, or me mentally using every scrap of energy to ensure luck plays out such that I get that job I REALLY want. I’ve been chasing that job for months and that interview with the people I’d actually be working under just made me want it more.
On a different note, last Sunday we went to check out a place we’d checked before about a dog they had shown on their website. We fell in love quickly and brought her home Wednesday. If someone told me finding this dog was the luck module, I’d believe them. She’s not perfect but calm and loving and just so good. She’s helping me a lot more mentally than I originally thought she would. I’m still crossing my fingers about the job. They’re supposed to get back to me either way this week.
Another thing I need to talk about is my brother. I know I’m not at a good place in my life or at least it feels that way to me (without a job for over a year, staying at my parent’s house (my parents are amazing, awesome, I owe them so much and I love them), I’m single (partially because I don’t feel like I’m at a good place mentally and emotionally and partially because I don’t know where to meet people locally),and I don’t have a lot of social contacts (partly by choice since I prefer a few close friends rather than many acquaintances plus not a party person)) and my brother just keeps subtlety insulting me and insulting me in so many ways that I’m just getting tired of it. I don’t want to cause a scene but it’s to the point where I’m just thinking my brother is a toxic person to be around, for me. Partially, I think I’m writing this to vent and process and probably also to finalize a decision of what to do in my mind. Oh well, I’ll just have to deal for now. In the long run, I don’t know what I’ll do. I’m alone in the house right now, so I’ll just enjoy some time with the good doggy.
