05-01-2019, 07:49 AM
35 nights of E3, 3 loops, Hybrid, Speakers.
So after 23 days of semen retention I released today, consciously. I had a suspicion that I am not thinking clearly because of all the sexual energy and after releasing 3-4 times today, I can say yeah I have definitely been thinking with my penis as of late.
There is benefits to it but there is unbeneficial aspects to it as well.
The last week or so I have gone from focusing on my academic goals, to fully focusing on women/woman because my sexual desire insisted. The funny thing is after releasing today it is like I have come back to my senses and thought to myself "Now I can focus on what is important, now that I have relieved my self of that sexual desire". Seriously it does feel like that.
Everything involves around having sex with women for me, every goal I have on some level involves women. Now what I liked about my long-term goal of going down the academic route and towards working in another country after. is that it too involved women but to get the women (at the end) I have to achieve a lot to get there! a win/win situation and that drove me towards it!
Now with this girl I am seeing now, it is like an instant gratification (I have not had sex with her yet, but that would be inevitable) and it turned me away from my goals. Yes obviously there is some part of me that wants that too, but after wiping out the sex side of it is like, do I really want this? I can think with my logical brain!
I am going to go back on semen retention tomorrow and after 3 days I will think more clearly from both sides. But I am glad I did this now because even though my body thinks it is....sex is NOT the answer, well at least not the complete answer.
Now, right now I don't know what I am going to do to be honest. She is really keen now and my sexual desire made me really keen and I know within 3 days my keenness will come back but I really need to tread carefully, as I do not want to hurt anyone's feelings or anything like that. But right now I am kind of confused because I don't really know what to make of all this.
It seems I can not do both focus on goals which takes me life on one direction and focus on this particular girl that feels like it take my life in another direction. I want them to be the same direction but for some reason it feels like they are different. I have to keep bringing my mind back to my goals.
I mean if I continue and get into a relationship with her and focus on my goals still, then later next year I will have to break up with her. I need to think of the other person in this situation too, as they do have emotions (I am not saying there is any emotions involved right now, but thinking ahead).
I would just tell her I plan to go Uni next year but it is not 100% as I need to pass and gain two qualifications before then, before it is 100% certain. I also do not tell any person my goals anyway as I feel like when I keep them to myself that keep the power and when I tell people it releases the power, it is something I have learned over the year and I am more powerful when I keep things to myself and just do what I got to do and then the results speak for themselves.
Any thoughts on this matter is welcome, I am open to ideas and new ways of looking at this that can allow me to develop my own new way of dealing with this, thinking of this etc.
So after 23 days of semen retention I released today, consciously. I had a suspicion that I am not thinking clearly because of all the sexual energy and after releasing 3-4 times today, I can say yeah I have definitely been thinking with my penis as of late.
There is benefits to it but there is unbeneficial aspects to it as well.
The last week or so I have gone from focusing on my academic goals, to fully focusing on women/woman because my sexual desire insisted. The funny thing is after releasing today it is like I have come back to my senses and thought to myself "Now I can focus on what is important, now that I have relieved my self of that sexual desire". Seriously it does feel like that.
Everything involves around having sex with women for me, every goal I have on some level involves women. Now what I liked about my long-term goal of going down the academic route and towards working in another country after. is that it too involved women but to get the women (at the end) I have to achieve a lot to get there! a win/win situation and that drove me towards it!
Now with this girl I am seeing now, it is like an instant gratification (I have not had sex with her yet, but that would be inevitable) and it turned me away from my goals. Yes obviously there is some part of me that wants that too, but after wiping out the sex side of it is like, do I really want this? I can think with my logical brain!
I am going to go back on semen retention tomorrow and after 3 days I will think more clearly from both sides. But I am glad I did this now because even though my body thinks it is....sex is NOT the answer, well at least not the complete answer.
Now, right now I don't know what I am going to do to be honest. She is really keen now and my sexual desire made me really keen and I know within 3 days my keenness will come back but I really need to tread carefully, as I do not want to hurt anyone's feelings or anything like that. But right now I am kind of confused because I don't really know what to make of all this.
It seems I can not do both focus on goals which takes me life on one direction and focus on this particular girl that feels like it take my life in another direction. I want them to be the same direction but for some reason it feels like they are different. I have to keep bringing my mind back to my goals.
I mean if I continue and get into a relationship with her and focus on my goals still, then later next year I will have to break up with her. I need to think of the other person in this situation too, as they do have emotions (I am not saying there is any emotions involved right now, but thinking ahead).
I would just tell her I plan to go Uni next year but it is not 100% as I need to pass and gain two qualifications before then, before it is 100% certain. I also do not tell any person my goals anyway as I feel like when I keep them to myself that keep the power and when I tell people it releases the power, it is something I have learned over the year and I am more powerful when I keep things to myself and just do what I got to do and then the results speak for themselves.
Any thoughts on this matter is welcome, I am open to ideas and new ways of looking at this that can allow me to develop my own new way of dealing with this, thinking of this etc.
