04-27-2019, 05:04 AM
Day 1
Today, I had some trouble starting my listening. I had purchased a new mp3 player, which I tested one week ago, and found to work perfectly, and to sync well with my bluetooth headphones. Today, the brand new mp3 player would stop at the ten second mark, never playing any further! I am going to send it back for a refund, and instead I am using my old cell phone as a dedicated mp3 player. That way, calls from my primary phone will not stop the recording while I listen.
I see the failure of a piece of technology I had planned to use for DMSI almost exclusively as an expression of some last minute resistance on my part, which I am now giving up; this freedom feels good and righ!
I notice that I am feeling sleepy during the day, which is not what I expect typically, because I got plenty of rest last night (or so I thought). The sleepy feeling could be my body getting used to the DMSI. Also, I notice that I am feeling energy and warmth moving through my body, as a very pleasant, light, and yet also strong, full-body sensation. I an enjoying this! It seems to have a healing impact, and I am aware of body heating itself, even though the room is cool when I am indoors.
About ten days from now, I will begin another screen-writing class, and I noticed that I felt scared about whether my screenplay is going to be good enough. I am scared of writing fiction, although I am an old hand and quite comfortable with writing virtually any kind of non-fiction. However, I am meant to become masterful at writing fiction, hence, I am taking courses that require me to do such work.
As I reflected on DMSI and how it is already impacting me, I knew that I would need to show myself as competent and ready to do all the work needed to deliver a screenplay I am truly pleased with for this next class. There is no room for me to do work that is anything less than I am happy to put my name on, and I felt that DMSI, in some way, had me see this so clearly. That is, I saw that being "less than" in my own head is simply not an option for me, as that has had the power to stop me from getting what I want with women, and my use of DMSI is a reflection of the reality that I am going for what I authentically wish to have in my life, in the best way I know how, at the moment.
Today, I had some trouble starting my listening. I had purchased a new mp3 player, which I tested one week ago, and found to work perfectly, and to sync well with my bluetooth headphones. Today, the brand new mp3 player would stop at the ten second mark, never playing any further! I am going to send it back for a refund, and instead I am using my old cell phone as a dedicated mp3 player. That way, calls from my primary phone will not stop the recording while I listen.
I see the failure of a piece of technology I had planned to use for DMSI almost exclusively as an expression of some last minute resistance on my part, which I am now giving up; this freedom feels good and righ!
I notice that I am feeling sleepy during the day, which is not what I expect typically, because I got plenty of rest last night (or so I thought). The sleepy feeling could be my body getting used to the DMSI. Also, I notice that I am feeling energy and warmth moving through my body, as a very pleasant, light, and yet also strong, full-body sensation. I an enjoying this! It seems to have a healing impact, and I am aware of body heating itself, even though the room is cool when I am indoors.
About ten days from now, I will begin another screen-writing class, and I noticed that I felt scared about whether my screenplay is going to be good enough. I am scared of writing fiction, although I am an old hand and quite comfortable with writing virtually any kind of non-fiction. However, I am meant to become masterful at writing fiction, hence, I am taking courses that require me to do such work.
As I reflected on DMSI and how it is already impacting me, I knew that I would need to show myself as competent and ready to do all the work needed to deliver a screenplay I am truly pleased with for this next class. There is no room for me to do work that is anything less than I am happy to put my name on, and I felt that DMSI, in some way, had me see this so clearly. That is, I saw that being "less than" in my own head is simply not an option for me, as that has had the power to stop me from getting what I want with women, and my use of DMSI is a reflection of the reality that I am going for what I authentically wish to have in my life, in the best way I know how, at the moment.
