My Journey after Alpha Male & Sex Magnet

[KeelS]

Welcome aboard, Keels, that's quite a story. Odd that you had sex with women during AM and stopped during SM, which is the reverse of what most of the guys are reporting, but definitely good stuff that your self respect has gone up. Now that you've finished your journey, where do you suppose your journal will go from here? Are you planning to run AM/SM again?

hmm you know I don't know! I'm not sure where to from here. I'm pretty happy where I am. I might take a look at the musician subliminals, or ones that improve focus. If life manages to kick my ass as severely as it's done before I'll have to use the AM again some day, but hopefully not. I'll probably decide over the next few weeks.


Listening to: Champagne Supernova

Well guys, I'll start my first entry. I went to my first real party since finishing the SM set on friday. I brought some friends with me, and I was in charge of the mixology for the night. For someone who really doesn't dance to modern music I'd highly recommend getting into it as it gives you something to do and you have enough excuses not to dance when a girl is trying to pull you to get down to britt spears or some shit. It's also a great way to get to talk to everyone, I'll admit I've gotten a little lazy and don't have to make much of an effort anymore this way. I used to have to learn names, do the awkward white guy dance, find dumb shit to make conversations about, but being the mixologist is gold. Everything flows, everyone loves you, and it's fun. It's like a game...do you like gin? no? rum? yes? cranberry? no? Great way to surprise people at the end when they don't know what they want.

So throughout the night, there were several girls competing for me. I made the mistake of letting one of them dominate the others by hovering around me and obstructing the others. Gotta get better at sending the hoverers off. But overall excellent results. There was one I liked especially but she left unexpectedly and only had a little time to talk to her. She had the good girl but mischievous look on her, polka dot dress, little bit of a dork. Loved it, nailed which drink to make her too and impressed her in front of her friends. Hopefully will see her again somewhere else, I was pretty bummed when she disappeared.

So of the three girls competing for me, I learned a lot, mostly from the hoverer. I'm not used to having to manage multiple girls going for my attention and trying to get me by themselves. It was also a difficult decision because they were all pretty on par with each in looks and personality, even the hoverer. The more I avoided the hoverer and the more I turned her down the harder she tried. It looks like I'll have to make a decision earlier about these types yes or no or they'll screw things up with the others. If I had shut her down hard in the beginning I could have managed the others much better. But then that leaves me with 2 I guess and despite the overing I did like them all about the same.....decisions!

So as the night progressed on and the hoverer became more agressive the others shied away and I was getting pretty drunk and pretty tired. Since my goal is no longer to get laid these days, I eventually said fuck it, made out with her, but not in front of the others incase I see them again, got her number, said I'd take her on a date and left. I'm not sure she's dating quality. It's always a gamble with people at parties. But I'm trying to give more girls a chance, I'm so picky these days if I didn't I don't think I'd ever go out. She clearly wanted me to sleep with her. Most likely sex. But sex is just no longer a personal goal for me. Now that I can pretty much have it, anytime a phone call away, I don't really care. I don't need an STD (it's a miracle I don't have one at this point), I don't need to hurt someone or get attached to someone who's otherwise not compatible...or we're drunk...the list goes on. Just not worth it!