Spiral, I totally sounded like an ungrateful asshat on that one didn't I...
one of the girls was the one I was infatuated with. she's been coming over more often lately (usually weekends). I may have hidden anger at that moment because of how she has manipulated me and saw through it with the help of Shannon's AM2011. It just feels awkward as I have been trying to avoid her so I can move on and here she is. tried to ask me a favor, it ended up in an argument and when I finally said 'NO', I felt good. I felt a little guilt because I used to do anything to make her happy and now I let her down. she really wants to go to this place and meet 'someone' and I've had about enough of that.
the funny thing is she found a way to go over there and meet the dude, she came back happy, she told me the details and we're closer than ever. I'm definitely in the friend zone here but I don't give a shit anymore.
I want these women's company, honestly. But I just feel the wanting to be alone and I guess I had this feeling of new found power over the situation and used it. I feel that I don't care if I attract them or not but I don't want to lose them ofcourse.
Also this is a major shift within me. I used to be a guy who would go anywhere as long as I have someone with me, more specifically a women I like. I usually cancel trips or going out If I don't have anybody go with me. I guess I wasn't comfortable with myself. But since stage 2 I've been going out by myself. Tried new things, ate at restaurants new to me. It feels great.
I think stage 2 is making me cocky and indifferent. while stage 1 seemed like an eye opener to the people who is taking advantage of me.
one of the girls was the one I was infatuated with. she's been coming over more often lately (usually weekends). I may have hidden anger at that moment because of how she has manipulated me and saw through it with the help of Shannon's AM2011. It just feels awkward as I have been trying to avoid her so I can move on and here she is. tried to ask me a favor, it ended up in an argument and when I finally said 'NO', I felt good. I felt a little guilt because I used to do anything to make her happy and now I let her down. she really wants to go to this place and meet 'someone' and I've had about enough of that.
the funny thing is she found a way to go over there and meet the dude, she came back happy, she told me the details and we're closer than ever. I'm definitely in the friend zone here but I don't give a shit anymore.
I want these women's company, honestly. But I just feel the wanting to be alone and I guess I had this feeling of new found power over the situation and used it. I feel that I don't care if I attract them or not but I don't want to lose them ofcourse.
Also this is a major shift within me. I used to be a guy who would go anywhere as long as I have someone with me, more specifically a women I like. I usually cancel trips or going out If I don't have anybody go with me. I guess I wasn't comfortable with myself. But since stage 2 I've been going out by myself. Tried new things, ate at restaurants new to me. It feels great.
I think stage 2 is making me cocky and indifferent. while stage 1 seemed like an eye opener to the people who is taking advantage of me.
