~Stand tall and shake the heavens~

[Shannon]

10th Day of AM2011

It has been, and still is a roller coaster with my emotions. It's almost happening everyday. Everyday I wake up, I feel so down with jealousy and regret that I feel paranoid. My mind keeps thinking whether I should forget this girl or just slow down. If I choose to forget her and focus only on myself for now, my mind becomes concrete about it. I feel confident and see myself six months from now when I finish Alpha Male sub, I see a better self than what I am. But then a few hours later I realize I still want her and I try to brush off all this jealousy and neediness so I can be with her. Neediness has toned down, but it is still there. I can sense when I'm being needy but I submit to it.

I feel very tired everyday. But that can be attributed to my lack of sleep I think, I usually rest from midnight til 6am.

I'm starting to think about whether I'm on the right track with this sub or not, or if I'm doing the right thing and the right decision. One thing is clear though, I will complete this journey no matter what!

You're going to need more sleep with this program. It's using a LOT of energy. Also need more exposure than 6 hours for best results.

Understand that questioning whether or not you're on the right track is resistance, and resistance is your subconscious mind's way of trying to get you to stay where you are. It's called homeostasis, the natural desire of your system (body and mind) to maintain an equilibrium that it believes will keep you safe and healthy. In other words, the currently existing subconscious "program" is trying to prevent itself from being overwritten, and one common way that the subconscious will do this is to cause you (consciously) to question yourself, doubt yourself, want to stop, etc. That only means it's working, and that you need to keep going.

So yes, do finish the entire set. There's a lot more to accomplish.