12-19-2016, 08:13 PM
(12-19-2016, 07:35 PM)eternity Wrote: It sounded like you were talking about me in the first half of your post. My dad is much the same way, also with a double masters in physics. It was awesome reading this because I related on so many levels. What helps me is to understand that my dad did the best for me with what he had available to him, and his intentions were always pure. Even if it meant I got screwed up over time because of it. I am a clone of my dad in a lot of ways, but polar opposite in other ways. Still to this day, a simple conversation with him has the potential to become an emotionally charged debate.
I had to learn to live by asking myself these questions when talking to him:
1. Does it need to be said?
2. Does it need to be said right now?
3. Does it need to be said by me?
Most of the time the answer is no! !!
It was the same way with my father. I'm 40 now, and this was the first time we were able to have a conversation like this.
Just like your dad, my father tried to do the best he could for me. I always appreciated that.
Honestly, it was only after my mom died that my dad and I really learned how to get along. We both lost the most important woman in our lives. While my mom was still alive, she would be mediator to her two boys.
That being said, I go through the same process in my head, even till this day, when it comes to my dad, knowing full well I'll be in for a parental ass-kicking.
Did I mention I'm 40 now...
It doesn't get any easier for us Desi boys Eternity, just saying...
