Darwin’s Journal

[Darwinn]

It’s been a miserable couple weeks. I’m pleased to say now that I’m mkstly out of it. I’m glad I didn’t jump off USLM in desperation.

Cognition is still at a low and I’d like to get that back on track. So from next week ill move to MLS untiil a little after UMS comes out. This desperation has been replaced again by a sense that this is a long game I’m in.

[Darwinn]

Whoa - everyone seems to be pleased as punch on USLM 3. Today is the day I get off it. It’s working, and I’ve seen some crazy manifestations of a specificity which is undeniable, however in spite of it having SE within, I haveZero functional self esteem. I don’t much care about success or feel happy about it, my identity is mush so who is getting success?

Without self hate or anything I consider genuinely that my brain and it’s chemistry is just not up to the task of maintaining a fragile self esteem, manifesting goals , while doing complex work. The self confident guy of 6 months ago has been replaced by the brainless guy of two years ago who was struggling to string two thoughts together. USLM 3 is not sustainable for me in its present form - and I’m taking the most important lesson I learned from subs after executing MLS amazingly having run SE, that there’s no real execution unless I have a decent sense of self esteem.

[Shannon]

That sounds like some extra clever escape tactics.

[Darwinn]

Of course it does. What else could it be ?

[Shannon]

I shall have to contemplate how to counter that, although it may already have been done.

[Darwinn]

Man I feel good and alive again. First day was spent emotionally vomiting up a bunch of anger and resentment like it had been lodged somewhere inside me for a long time. Now all the shit that was bothering me while on USLM is clear and I’m once again able to work through it calmly. Two days gap between USLM and SE and no turbulence noticeable - probably because SE is already just a minor part of USLM.

If it weren’t for the fact I was greedy for more I would stay on this sub for the next year.

[Darwinn]

Shannon, for what it’s worth, USLM was helping bring very specific things into my life with speed but physically I felt like I had. A rock in my head , I couldn’t speak or put together quick and intuitive thoughts, I was stuck behind feelings of inadequacy (I know that’s fear) which seemed insurmountable. As a result I’ve beeen stuck at work on a huge project. I’m pretty screwed for this now but at least I’m cool with making the progress I can.

[THolt]

Man I feel good and alive again. First day was spent emotionally vomiting up a bunch of anger and resentment like it had been lodged somewhere inside me for a long time. Now all the shit that was bothering me while on USLM is clear and I’m once again able to work through it calmly. Two days gap between USLM and SE and no turbulence noticeable - probably because SE is already just a minor part of USLM.

If it weren’t for the fact I was greedy for more I would stay on this sub for the next year.

Are you going to upgrade to USLM4, LTU or UMS when they come out?

[Darwinn]

Id like to but I don’t know about how immediately I would - I have some issues which need to be handled that I think get in the way of me executing. I executed mls like a dream when coming off SE and whilst it’s possible that there are other reasons my own opinion is that I have to focus on training out of negative self talk and beliefs before being able to execute
Other subs well.

[Hatman]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the full script of SE is already in the skeleton script which means that every new subliminal has it. When you say that you need to work through some issues before you can execute just know that FRM is already doing that for you, and before it is done working you may or may not execute all parts of the script, including the SE part. The updated FRM is going to make that process a hell of a lot faster than it currently is for us.

MLS has much older technology in it and the reason you executed it so well might be because it wasn't as demanding of your subconscious as USLM is. It didn't push it hard or far enough for it to get scared and require the FRM.

If you go back to older subliminals such as MLS, you may execute better from the get go, but the results may never be as good as if you executed the newer subliminals at full capacity after the FRM does its job.

Ask yourself this, are you planning on staying with the old tech forever? If not, you'll have to go through the FRM eventually, so might as well do it now.

It's a war of attrition between your conscious, the script, and the subconscious. You just have to hold on until the resistant subconscious gets convinced to execute.

Ask yourself if this is just an excuse to run away.

[Darwinn]

Appreciate the thought but I’m not totally new to these subliminals. I’ve asked myself that many times and could have stopped way before but for the very concern that this was merely me just finding excuses. If SE were updated with FRM I’d be using it.

[Hatman]

But it is, it's just not the main focus. The subliminal you want is not going to come for a little while longer. What are you going to do in the meantime? You said you could have stopped way before, but you didn't. What changed?

[Darwinn]

Not the focus is the point.

All that changed was I realised the only reason I was staying on USLM was a fear of missing out on more interesting manifestations - now I want to focus on se for a while, then when I want to - will possibly go back to USLM , by then USLM 4, or given my experience of 5g, move to LTU.

[Zane]

Maybe you should try 3.3.