Shannon's Journal Discussion Volume 3

[Broski]

After 4 days of US/LM2-

Saturday started out like any other days over the past few months for me; With obsessive worrying and anxiety about different things. Later in the afternoon I went over to a friends to hang out for the day. Soon thereafter, I was no longer focused on my struggles/issues as of late. I was feeling more in the moment, relaxed , and expressive. Just able to have a good time and laugh it up with my buds. Probably the best and most free ive felt in a good while.

The next day(sunday) that same state was no longer in full force, but I still was not experiencing quite as much anxiety or the focusing on what has been causing me strife. Fast forward to the right as I am going to bed however, and the fear started picking back up. As I was getting ready/ going to bed I started getting flashes of this kind of ghoul like creature coming after me as I started to sleep. I did my best to not focus on it, but it kept popping up for a good while. As a kid I was always scared of horror movies and different creepy/ ghostly things and would sometimes get thoughts like these.

Then into my later years with this issue I developed that i detailed in here a few weeks to a month ago(basically the fear of fear itself, sorry Teddy Roosevelt, I failed you) when I get anything negative like this in my mind I then get fearful that I am focusing on it and will bring more of it/bad things/ anxiety and fear into my life. Basically using the law of attraction against myself lol. Its been quite the fd up vicious cycle. I have been doing my best to overcome this however, and will NOT give up or give in.

So anyway, I eventually managed to fall asleep. Halfway through the night though I had a VERY intense dream. In it I had woken up in my bed during the night, and was just laying there thinking it was real. Suddenly I started hearing these dissent whispers coming from around me somewhere. Then all of a sudden my body started getting pulled from my bed towards the wall to the right of me. I tried to brace myself on my fan and stop from getting pulled, but I could not. As this was happening the whispers were increasing in quantity and intensity. I couldn't stop the force and was pulled straight into the wall. I began yelling in terror and at that moment woke up with a slight "ah" sound coming out of my mouth.

Now as opposed to my dream after my first day on the program where I only felt slight fear, in this one the fear was VERY intense. Maybe its just things coming up from the FRM getting to the core of my fears?

If you have any thoughts on all of it Shannon I would love to hear them.

Are you noticing the tidal effect? You make progress, which scares some part of you, which is abated as you make more progress, which scares some part of you, which is abated as you make more progress... but each time, things advance further.

What's happening is that you're making progress overcoming your fears.

This is not quite how I wanted it to happen, though. I will be creating a V3 of the FRM for DMSI 3.3 to try to make this process significantly easier. In fact I have already started working on that.

That said... you have a fear based feedback loop. You fear what you fear, and you fear the fear, and the process of being afraid and everything else. The fear feeds itself.

But the FRM should disrupt this and erase it over enough exposure. Keep going.

That tidal effect is EXACTLY what it seems like since starting US/LN2 in a way. Some relief and progress, then kicked back to anxiety mode, then back to some relief and progress, then back to anxiety ect. It seems like overall though I am heading in the right direction as you said. I will keep pushing forward. Ready to stomp this mofm fear out!

[Shawn]

I had a strange experience after my first day USLM2. In the past when I was with girls and got aroused usually some fear came up that they may feel it and may feel offended by that feeling. Today in the morning I got close to attractive girls and started to get the same feeling. But then the fear was somehow shut down but also any other emotion I have had and for the first half of the day I couldn't get any feelings in terms of girls and if I started to feel something then it was shutdown almost the same moment. But now my feelings seem to be back. It was still strange.

Other than that, when I yesterday bought something on Amazon I noticed that one of the articles on my wishlist got a discount of 15% until that day, so I got a really good deal. Today in the canteen I decided to take the expensive meal. First I didn't only got one steak, I got two. And then on the checkout they only charged me for the cheap meal. And an hour ago or so I got a book for free on Amazon which was of my interest.

Regarding USLM1 I started version A after about two weeks, because all the unpleasant, little accidents became more and more on B up to the point where nothing positive happened, just the negative things. That changed on A almost immediately. I think I didn't notice that many things happening like on B, but the downsites were gone for good. At that time I also felt encouraged to start experiment with listening patterns and it seems like I did better than with standard patterns. Some kind of slow but steady progress. I also started to tolerate hybrid tracks better that way which lead in the past almost immediately to stonewalling. The most prominent thing I got on v1 was an offer for taking further business training at company cost. There was also something else important, but that's still in process, so I don't want to mention.

[Shannon]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

[Shawn]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

Well, I don't know what happened there. The only thought I had was that shutting down everything was the only thing to prevent fear at that moment. But like I said, it looks like the emotions are back, I only noticed some slight attempt of shutdown later the day, but nothing serious.


I had somehow many realizations while on USLM, maybe because one of my goal is to execute DMSI. Most of them are probably covered by the FRM, but I will write them down, maybe it is of use.

1. I had the impression that I resisted subs in the past more on the (semi)conscious level than I thought. Especially because I wanted to have things going my way and not other way, which probably prevented execution in some terms.

2. Resistance against ultrasonic/hybrid was probably because the us part is louder and that's not only perceived as being told what to do but it is also perceived as a threat which brings everything to shutdown.

3. Emotions can also create fear by themselves as they are unpredictable.

4. Not everything is fear related and cannot be resolved (directly) through fear removal, because:
a) The patterns which were created through fear in the past seem to remain after fear removal. They will be dissolved with new experiences when fear doesn't prevent new experiences but at the begin they can stand in the way. For example today in the morning while I didn't feel anything I figured out that I wouldn't approach a woman, because I could do something wrong and embarass myself. I didn't feel it, but my mind told my that it is important to no embarass myself as it is important to be flawless. And while I know that the reasons behind are fear related the pattern itself became strong enough during the years to exist by itself.

b) That is something I realized while listening to USLM2. At the middle of the first loop I started to feel similar like I felt when I was stonewalling DMSI, but it was still a bit different. I was thinking all the time "You must be kidding me". First I didn't know where it comes from but then I realized that's about the script of the sub. It is like the reality presented by the script is in some cases so far from the reality of the user that the script is being ignored. That's also not fear related. I mean, just imagine a situation. Imagine you are walking down the street and a guy comes around and tells you "Dude, just spread your arms and fly". I mean, you would think this guy is either total crazy or totally wasted because based on your reality you know that you can't fly this way. Therefore you would simply ignore him and maybe even become angry when he insists that you can do it. And I think this is what in some cases happens, because the reality from the user is too far from the reality presented by the script. This of course doesn't mean that people cannot stonewall scripts out of fear.

I think I had another one or two, but don't remember them now. If I do later I will post it.

[Hatman]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

4. Not everything is fear related and cannot be resolved (directly) through fear removal, because:
a) The patterns which were created through fear in the past seem to remain after fear removal. They will be dissolved with new experiences when fear doesn't prevent new experiences but at the begin they can stand in the way. For example today in the morning while I didn't feel anything I figured out that I wouldn't approach a woman, because I could do something wrong and embarass myself. I didn't feel it, but my mind told my that it is important to no embarass myself as it is important to be flawless. And while I know that the reasons behind are fear related the pattern itself became strong enough during the years to exist by itself.

b) That is something I realized while listening to USLM2. At the middle of the first loop I started to feel similar like I felt when I was stonewalling DMSI, but it was still a bit different. I was thinking all the time "You must be kidding me". First I didn't know where it comes from but then I realized that's about the script of the sub. It is like the reality presented by the script is in some cases so far from the reality of the user that the script is being ignored. That's also not fear related. I mean, just imagine a situation. Imagine you are walking down the street and a guy comes around and tells you "Dude, just spread your arms and fly". I mean, you would think this guy is either total crazy or totally wasted because based on your reality you know that you can't fly this way. Therefore you would simply ignore him and maybe even become angry when he insists that you can do it. And I think this is what in some cases happens, because the reality from the user is too far from the reality presented by the script. This of course doesn't mean that people cannot stonewall scripts out of fear.

I think I had another one or two, but don't remember them now. If I do later I will post it.

Interesting, especially 4a

[Have at ye]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

4. Not everything is fear related and cannot be resolved (directly) through fear removal, because:
a) The patterns which were created through fear in the past seem to remain after fear removal. They will be dissolved with new experiences when fear doesn't prevent new experiences but at the begin they can stand in the way. For example today in the morning while I didn't feel anything I figured out that I wouldn't approach a woman, because I could do something wrong and embarass myself. I didn't feel it, but my mind told my that it is important to no embarass myself as it is important to be flawless. And while I know that the reasons behind are fear related the pattern itself became strong enough during the years to exist by itself.

b) That is something I realized while listening to USLM2. At the middle of the first loop I started to feel similar like I felt when I was stonewalling DMSI, but it was still a bit different. I was thinking all the time "You must be kidding me". First I didn't know where it comes from but then I realized that's about the script of the sub. It is like the reality presented by the script is in some cases so far from the reality of the user that the script is being ignored. That's also not fear related. I mean, just imagine a situation. Imagine you are walking down the street and a guy comes around and tells you "Dude, just spread your arms and fly". I mean, you would think this guy is either total crazy or totally wasted because based on your reality you know that you can't fly this way. Therefore you would simply ignore him and maybe even become angry when he insists that you can do it. And I think this is what in some cases happens, because the reality from the user is too far from the reality presented by the script. This of course doesn't mean that people cannot stonewall scripts out of fear.

I think I had another one or two, but don't remember them now. If I do later I will post it.

Interesting, especially 4a

That 4a) pattern is fear-based and most probably fear-fed. You remove the fear, you should be able to replace it with a different pattern, should you so choose. Nothing exists by itself.

[Hatman]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

4. Not everything is fear related and cannot be resolved (directly) through fear removal, because:
a) The patterns which were created through fear in the past seem to remain after fear removal. They will be dissolved with new experiences when fear doesn't prevent new experiences but at the begin they can stand in the way. For example today in the morning while I didn't feel anything I figured out that I wouldn't approach a woman, because I could do something wrong and embarass myself. I didn't feel it, but my mind told my that it is important to no embarass myself as it is important to be flawless. And while I know that the reasons behind are fear related the pattern itself became strong enough during the years to exist by itself.

b) That is something I realized while listening to USLM2. At the middle of the first loop I started to feel similar like I felt when I was stonewalling DMSI, but it was still a bit different. I was thinking all the time "You must be kidding me". First I didn't know where it comes from but then I realized that's about the script of the sub. It is like the reality presented by the script is in some cases so far from the reality of the user that the script is being ignored. That's also not fear related. I mean, just imagine a situation. Imagine you are walking down the street and a guy comes around and tells you "Dude, just spread your arms and fly". I mean, you would think this guy is either total crazy or totally wasted because based on your reality you know that you can't fly this way. Therefore you would simply ignore him and maybe even become angry when he insists that you can do it. And I think this is what in some cases happens, because the reality from the user is too far from the reality presented by the script. This of course doesn't mean that people cannot stonewall scripts out of fear.

I think I had another one or two, but don't remember them now. If I do later I will post it.

Interesting, especially 4a

That 4a) pattern is fear-based and most probably fear-fed. You remove the fear, you should be able to replace it with a different pattern, should you so choose. Nothing exists by itself.

Right, and those patterns stand in the way only in the beginning as Mr. Anderson mentioned.

[Tigerismyspirit]

Shannon, my mind is haywire right now. It is trying to convince me to give up MLS and get back straight on DMSI 3.2. Today, I feel like I need to weep in order to clear something that has been in my stomach for a while. All of a sudden, a male colleague asked coyly if E (the girl that I asked out about 7 months ago and she never got back) and I were trying our lucks. That triggered an anxiety around her rejection and I've been listening to her favorite songs. I don't know man! Your subs have totally lost my mind. I think I'm going mad.

[nele91]

Hi @Williamx25 , I'm also listening to the MLS for 56 days,4 loops,1 day on,1 day off. I want to become fluent in english and need to become fluent in italian,because I'm in Italy now. I'm thinking that we need to listen to it for everyday, because for me it's not giving that much of a result. I will wait until 90 days and then start to listen it for every day 4 loops,to see what will happen. Good luck

Are you resisting? Procrastinating? Stonewalling? What?

I'm procrastinating, I do everything else but learning, when I take some book to read, I read only a few pages and get tired, before I used to read up to 30 pages a day...
Do you think that I need to make some changes in listening, maybe lower it to 3l per day? Thanks

[Have at ye]

That seems like an odd reaction. Maybe the fear would have been led to by the emotions being blocked?

Over time, that should stop happening, if it happens again.

4. Not everything is fear related and cannot be resolved (directly) through fear removal, because:
a) The patterns which were created through fear in the past seem to remain after fear removal. They will be dissolved with new experiences when fear doesn't prevent new experiences but at the begin they can stand in the way. For example today in the morning while I didn't feel anything I figured out that I wouldn't approach a woman, because I could do something wrong and embarass myself. I didn't feel it, but my mind told my that it is important to no embarass myself as it is important to be flawless. And while I know that the reasons behind are fear related the pattern itself became strong enough during the years to exist by itself.

b) That is something I realized while listening to USLM2. At the middle of the first loop I started to feel similar like I felt when I was stonewalling DMSI, but it was still a bit different. I was thinking all the time "You must be kidding me". First I didn't know where it comes from but then I realized that's about the script of the sub. It is like the reality presented by the script is in some cases so far from the reality of the user that the script is being ignored. That's also not fear related. I mean, just imagine a situation. Imagine you are walking down the street and a guy comes around and tells you "Dude, just spread your arms and fly". I mean, you would think this guy is either total crazy or totally wasted because based on your reality you know that you can't fly this way. Therefore you would simply ignore him and maybe even become angry when he insists that you can do it. And I think this is what in some cases happens, because the reality from the user is too far from the reality presented by the script. This of course doesn't mean that people cannot stonewall scripts out of fear.

I think I had another one or two, but don't remember them now. If I do later I will post it.

Interesting, especially 4a

That 4a) pattern is fear-based and most probably fear-fed. You remove the fear, you should be able to replace it with a different pattern, should you so choose. Nothing exists by itself.

Right, and those patterns stand in the way only in the beginning as Mr. Anderson mentioned.

Well, I figured the reasoning Mr. Anderson had for maintaining the pattern, even absent the experience of anxiety/fear, is still fear based (potential embarrassment, unattainable standards - flawlessness), so I'd say there's still some fear there underneath. Maybe not the emotion of fear any more, but the "I must protect myself" aspect of the whole thing.

[Broski]

Something else I forgot to note about US/LM 2-

Been waking up feeling VERY tired and pretty tired through the day the past few days. Also think I picked up a slight cold which may or may not be related.

Despite this though both yesterday and the today I managed to hit PRs(Personal records) on a few lifts in the gym.

Was pretty surprised I managed to pull that off, but hell ill take it!

Would absolutely LOVE if US/LM2 can continually enhance my gym performance as I have my sighst set on some lofty goals for myself in the lifting/ athletic department

[freerad98]

I was off DMSI3.2 for about 55 days before I began using US/LMax when it released. I think I've been feeling some of the same thing @Broski, and others have been feeling. It's been a long time since I've felt this depressed. Not going to let it bother me, just realize it's there and keep going. I'm glad that the FRM is going to be tweaked and optimized, because I really don't like these feelings at all. I've always responded subtly with a slow burn, so I know it will eventually work everything out. Onward >>>

[Broski]

I was off DMSI3.2 for about 55 days before I began using US/LMax when it released. I think I've been feeling some of the same thing @Broski, and others have been feeling. It's been a long time since I've felt this depressed. Not going to let it bother me, just realize it's there and keep going. I'm glad that the FRM is going to be tweaked and optimized, because I really don't like these feelings at all. I've always responded subtly with a slow burn, so I know it will eventually work everything out. Onward >>>

Just to clarify, the issues Ive been personally dealing with started popping up prior to me beginning the first US/LM, and since being on US/LM2 have actually been relatively slightly better.

[freerad98]

I was off DMSI3.2 for about 55 days before I began using US/LMax when it released. I think I've been feeling some of the same thing @Broski, and others have been feeling. It's been a long time since I've felt this depressed. Not going to let it bother me, just realize it's there and keep going. I'm glad that the FRM is going to be tweaked and optimized, because I really don't like these feelings at all. I've always responded subtly with a slow burn, so I know it will eventually work everything out. Onward >>>

Just to clarify, the issues Ive been personally dealing with started popping up prior to me beginning the first US/LM, and since being on US/LM2 have actually been relatively slightly better.

Ah, OK, No Problem.

Anyway, another thing I've noticed is it seems my "luck" has been slightly more negative lately. As in before US/LMax I usually had slightly positive luck. Not sure if it's related, but reporting it.

Another unrelated question: Is it possible to have interfering TID? As in I'm currently running US/LMax, but will be running DMSI3.3 after it releases. Or what about 2 different unreleased subs, that may be released fairly close together?