• made the most courageous decision I have done this year. Handed in my notice from the job I worked for 4 years, but have been stagnating in the last 2 years. I did without (yet) having another offer on the table. I feared doing this for such a long time, now I've just done it.
  
• had 1-2 heroic dreams
  
• Felt the same otherwise
  
• very tired throught the days.
  
• I listen to 3 loops at night, hybrid flac track. One night I accidentaly did 5 loops.
  

(05-04-2020, 06:46 PM)Shannon Wrote: What did you notice when you did 5 loops?

• Overall feeling of being emotionally stable.
  
• Less judgemental on myself
  
• don't dream very often these times
  
• whenever reading or finding out other about other people's emotional / mental blocks, I get bothered by it, "just be strong and get over it" would be my advice. 
  
• I seem to no longer identify with self-pity and victim playing, which I did a lot in the past. I would say I am progressing towards emotional maturity. I see more solutions and less excuses brought up by my mind
  
• I have not been triggered or bothered by much this week. Generally in a feeling of content
  
• Thinking highly of myself.
  

(05-09-2020, 12:52 AM)GreekGod22 Wrote: Week 2 summary

• Overall feeling of being emotionally stable.
  
• Less judgemental on myself
  
• don't dream very often these times
  
• whenever reading or finding out other about other people's emotional / mental blocks, I get bothered by it, "just be strong and get over it" would be my advice. 
  
• I seem to no longer identify with self-pity and victim playing, which I did a lot in the past. I would say I am progressing towards emotional maturity. I see more solutions and less excuses brought up by my mind
  
• I have not been triggered or bothered by much this week. Generally in a feeling of content
  
• Thinking highly of myself.
  

• similar feelings to those I've had in week 2
  
• overall progressing towards a better and healthier management of my emotions. That is, if I get triggered, I no longer fall into the negative thinking spiral, I don't let it ruin my day, I don't let it cloud my judgement and my decisions.
  
• I am more present and future-oriented.
  
• If I have feelings that challenge my self worth, I don't let them define me. Like I did many times before
  
• I am more gentle with myself, I am seeing less and less harsh criticism towards myself.
  
• I have had a few dreams related to my recent past. One was a sexual dream, I was having sex with my ex (and I don't care about her at all anymore)
  

• baseline levels of anxiety continue to fall
  
• realized my anxiety and negative thoughts were partially psysiological (hypoglicemia), and ensuring that I am well fed throught the day makes me more emotionally stable.
  
• I have gone on a date this week, I wasn't at my best, I was somewhat stifled, shy, tensed, not fully relaxed. But that's ok, I did not beat myself over it
  
• I've also talked to several other women, I realized I want to meet them, but I have a fear of being in a sexual scenario with them, like it would expose some vulnerability / insecurity of mine. And because of this, I tend to sabotage myself and  act uninterested.
  
• overall tendency this week to be assertive
  
• having an epiphany about how my depression came to be (I wasn't meeting my needs, my desires, my soul's wishes) and how damaging social isolation is, how it skews your perception of the world and shapes your beliefs and outlook on the world
  

• went on another date this week. I still felt like my former shy, timid self, but to a lesser degree. The girl offered me a cigar at some point. I instantly relaxed and was able to vibe and connect with her.
  
• I am taking care of my physical appearance more and more (which I've neglected in the last few years due to depression). Paying more attention to grooming, got a slick haircut at the barber
  
• I am slowly and surely getting rid of chronic & learned helplessnes.
  
• I am supportive of myself, I care deeply for myself. Self-criticism has reduced big time.
  
• starting to feel more entitled and deserving of high quality girls