(12-31-2016, 09:34 PM)Eurasian Wrote: Day 29
I act much more calm and focused when I am interacting with people, but I still feel strangely invisible.
I am also aware of all the negative thought loops that are constantly on my mind, they're all related to girls. I am tired of them and try to stop them as soon as they occur. I have the feeling that nothing good can come out of constantly rationalizing in my mind as to why I don't find a girlfriend here. These thoughts are terribly annoying to have, but they play like a broken record in my mind throughout the day. In reaction to these thoughts I am trying to contemplate why they've occurred in the first place, but aside from lack of positive experiences in that regard, I can't think of a good reason. I honestly think that I've had a good and comfortable life and shouldn't have a reason to complain. Still, I'd love to simply banish those negative thoughts and feelings of inferiority for good. I am sick and tired of them, yet they come up everyday.
As such, I will keep running Version A until 3.1 comes out.
Shannon, based on my reports so far, do you think that I am resisting the program out of pure fear or even stonewalling it? Or am I simply clearing through so much baggage in my subconscious mind that it will take years for me to see obvious external results?