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+--- Thread: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal (/Thread-JG-s-Alpha-Male-6-Journal)
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - ImFreeman - 01-03-2016
(01-03-2016, 02:13 AM)CatMan Wrote: Well I meant putting the icepack directly ON your penis and your stomach where all that heat is coming from. It works wonders and REALLY quells the urge. Thankfully, it was only that bad ONCE, and once I successfully resisted, now I'm way beyond my personal record earlier in the program of 28 days of nofap. Now, currently, I'm at day 36 of nofap, almost 37!
I can't wait for my PIED to heal up. It's been a LONG time since I've had an actual, normal erection. That will be an amazing experience to finally have again.
What problem did you experience that makes you think you have ED?, did you had to perform but it did not get up? or are you looking to have erections on command but can't (this is stupid you need to be aroused for an erection to happen)
Look carefully here, for any fear on performance that stops you from pursuing sex. There is not going to ever be a golden erection and a perfect performance, some are better than others, the healthier you are the better off you will be, but stop overthinking it, i doubt it is something to really be concerned of
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - CatMan - 01-03-2016
(01-03-2016, 10:41 AM)ImFreeman Wrote: What problem did you experience that makes you think you have ED?, did you had to perform but it did not get up? or are you looking to have erections on command but can't (this is stupid you need to be aroused for an erection to happen)
Look carefully here, for any fear on performance that stops you from pursuing sex. There is not going to ever be a golden erection and a perfect performance, some are better than others, the healthier you are the better off you will be, but stop overthinking it, i doubt it is something to really be concerned of
Yes, I'm fully aware somebody needs to be aroused in order to get an erection. Thanks. PIED goes much deeper than just having an issue with erections, it also messes with libido and confidence, among other issues.
Why do I think I have PIED? It's been years since I've had a real erection, I can't even remember the last time. Even with porn, masturbation, being with a girl, spontaneous, you name it. Also my libido is next to nothing and I have had anxieties and hangups about girls and sex, which is exactly what these two addictions to porn and masturbation often cause. I have brain fog and procrastination from them as well. It's absolutely something to be concerned with, pretty hard to have sex without the ability to gain an erection, nevermind the libido and other problems. It's PIED, NOT "normal" ED. The two are entirely different, with respect. It's a frequent mistake to lump them together and just pass it off as a health related thing or fear thing. I've posted a test before that is used to determine if you have PIED or not. It's very helpful in boiling down whether it's some fear, or performance anxiety, or PIED.
Anyway, PIED is a side effect of porn addiction and masturbation addiction, hence Pornography-Induced Erectile Dysfunction. There's a wealth of information on the subject. I won't derail the journal of someone else. I've talked about it before anyway so it'd be redundant. I was just showing solidarity with Javier who also seems to be sufferer. A lot of men are, of one of the addictions, if not both.
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 01-15-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 3 of AM 6.0
(01-03-2016, 02:13 AM)CatMan Wrote: Well I meant putting the icepack directly ON your penis and your stomach where all that heat is coming from. It works wonders and REALLY quells the urge. Thankfully, it was only that bad ONCE, and once I successfully resisted, now I'm way beyond my personal record earlier in the program of 28 days of nofap. Now, currently, I'm at day 36 of nofap, almost 37!
I can't wait for my PIED to heal up. It's been a LONG time since I've had an actual, normal erection. That will be an amazing experience to finally have again.
Continue the path of nofap brother. I guess I'm currently around Day 23. I've had strong urges recently. Hopefully I was able to fight the urge to watch porn.
(01-03-2016, 10:54 PM)CatMan Wrote:(01-03-2016, 10:41 AM)ImFreeman Wrote: What problem did you experience that makes you think you have ED?, did you had to perform but it did not get up? or are you looking to have erections on command but can't (this is stupid you need to be aroused for an erection to happen)
Look carefully here, for any fear on performance that stops you from pursuing sex. There is not going to ever be a golden erection and a perfect performance, some are better than others, the healthier you are the better off you will be, but stop overthinking it, i doubt it is something to really be concerned of
Yes, I'm fully aware somebody needs to be aroused in order to get an erection. Thanks. PIED goes much deeper than just having an issue with erections, it also messes with libido and confidence, among other issues.
Why do I think I have PIED? It's been years since I've had a real erection, I can't even remember the last time. Even with porn, masturbation, being with a girl, spontaneous, you name it. Also my libido is next to nothing and I have had anxieties and hangups about girls and sex, which is exactly what these two addictions to porn and masturbation often cause. I have brain fog and procrastination from them as well. It's absolutely something to be concerned with, pretty hard to have sex without the ability to gain an erection, nevermind the libido and other problems. It's PIED, NOT "normal" ED. The two are entirely different, with respect. It's a frequent mistake to lump them together and just pass it off as a health related thing or fear thing. I've posted a test before that is used to determine if you have PIED or not. It's very helpful in boiling down whether it's some fear, or performance anxiety, or PIED.
Anyway, PIED is a side effect of porn addiction and masturbation addiction, hence Pornography-Induced Erectile Dysfunction. There's a wealth of information on the subject. I won't derail the journal of someone else. I've talked about it before anyway so it'd be redundant. I was just showing solidarity with Javier who also seems to be sufferer. A lot of men are, of one of the addictions, if not both.
Man, feel free to post here. I actually want to thank you for doing so because I'm learning a lot from your post. I do hope you get over your PIED. I have one as well though it's kind of different in your situation. Recently probably due to No Fap and No Porn, I've been having strong morning woods every single day that can only be relieve when I urinate. I can easily get boners just by the sight of girls I see even on public. However, they still can't make me approach these girls I find cute.
As an update, on this stage I can feel that I am less aggressive or probably trying to be less aggressive. There were many instance recently when I avoided getting emotional whenever I drive. I've been doing deep breathing exercises whenever I feel anxiety or strong emotions.
I've yet to finish the book "How to Become an Alpha Male" by John Alexander. I've read it once before though as following the instructions of AM 6.0, I will be reading it again.
Till my next update which I hope soon enough.
Cheers!
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - wolverine_i_am - 01-21-2016
I'm doing AM6 as well, so subbing to your thread. I found that as soon as I started AM6, I suddenly had no urges to look at porn. But I'm still at the beginning stages, so we'll see how it plays out.
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 02-02-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 4 of AM 6.0
It's been a while. I've had some sure signs back on Stage 3 that I felt that the sub is working though I forgot most if not all of them. Through this Stage 4 of AM 6.0 I hope I can finally enumerate them here.
First off, I thought my anger was already kept in check but I was wrong. Recently I had numerous outburst of anger to the point that I threw some pebbles at my neighbor's car. This is not good. I should deal with this soon through proper breathing. I am already doing slow breathing while driving my car in order to control my temper.
My No Fap journey is somehow contributing to this because I haven't had any release from masturbation for almost 40 days now. I haven't watched porn as well so my body is pretty much clamoring for a release. I had a wet dream recently and I think my first since my streak started. As I have read, wet dreams are actually a bit detrimental in recovering from porn. From the dream I can partly say that I've seen some patches or influence from porn. Anyhow, it is still all good and I'm happy to be able to continue with the streak. I am glad that I am able to get to these number of days without porn. I wish I am finally on my way to finally freeing myself from porn.
I believe I will review the changes that I will experience or what the AM 6.0 sub is targeting through each of the stages. As of now on Stage 4, I am still experiencing heavy resistance due to my fears. Like fear of rejection and fear of success. Overcoming them is detrimental for the goals I want in my life.
(01-21-2016, 06:13 PM)wolverine_i_am Wrote: I'm doing AM6 as well, so subbing to your thread. I found that as soon as I started AM6, I suddenly had no urges to look at porn. But I'm still at the beginning stages, so we'll see how it plays out.
Thanks for this man. I will try to update this journal with more journal entries. I will try to read other journals especially yours as well.
It's great that you finally decided to remove porn from your life as well. We all know it is hard and I believe that you have seen here the struggles that I have faced from overcoming it.
Cheers!
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 02-21-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 4 of AM 6.0
There were days wherein I am feeling like a blast! However on the other hand I can't seem to handle my fears and I get into depression mode. I still have deep seated fears like fear of being alone, fear of being abandoned, fear of rejection, fear of success and fear of failure. I need to practice switching these emotions off and let my mind be at peace. One thing that works is through deep breathing exercises. I want to be able to achieve my goals and being fearful won't help me achieve them.
Lately, I've been seeing a girl and it's been going good. I want to take the relationship to another level and I hope we get there. She's fun to be around and we have a lot in common. I am happy that the relationship is going well.
My No Fap and No Porn journey is still going strong. I believe I am already close to 60 days. The badge or the no fap counter on the no fap subreddit seems to be have malfunctioned. With the streak, I believe it has helped me to stay on the path of my goal.
I got back into playing and practicing the guitar as well. I started playing it more than 2 years ago but have stopped close to a year ago. I wish I hadn't stopped. The same way with playing the violin. If only I can reserve at least an hour of practicing per day with any musical instrument, I will definitely improve a lot in a span of a year.
I hope all you guys are doing great as well. We all face challenges every single day but I believe we can all get through them. Be strong guys!
Cheers!
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Vincent_Vega - 02-21-2016
V reporting in!
I don't know why, but I'm somehow always excited when I see that you posted something.
V out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 02-28-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 4 of AM 6.0
After a week of my previous update, I feel there's a need to post my recent concern here. I've been getting vivid dreams lately. The thing I should take note of them is most of them concerns my fears. For instance, one of them is wherein I lost a relationship of mine, making me woke up with a dreaded feeling.
Is this because of the sub? Is the sub testing me like in a way letting my subconscious out?
This is hard on me because I get emotional after the dream. I felt sadness and I think what if it really happens. I do hope I get past through them and they won't happen in real life.
I'm still going strong with my current No Fap and No Porn streak which is a good thing. It has helped me to continue on even if things weren't going in my favor. As I have said, it is helping me feel good in a sense that I am accomplishing my goal of quitting porn for good.
(02-21-2016, 04:01 PM)Vincent_Vega Wrote: V reporting in!
I don't know why, but I'm somehow always excited when I see that you posted something.
V out!
Thanks a lot man! Reading that makes me glad. I will do my best to post timely updates that we can all learn a thing or two.
Cheers!
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - ImFreeman - 02-28-2016
Hey JG! good to see you. Are you from Spain, Argentina, Mexico or some other spanish talking country ??..
Regarding your dream yes it definetly is the sub working, you might have some kind of irrational fear of losing that relationship. Of course if that happens it is gonna suck and be painful, but remember that you were OK before that relationship and you are gonna be OK if that ends.
I had similar things happen in my dreams when running AM6, i remember dreading crossing paths with my highschool bully... and during a dream which involved him, i woke up and thought "this is stupid, if i cross him again im going to say this and that and i am going to be alright" and the fear of crossing him was no more. Its like the sub made me reach a solution for the problem in my mind.
So yeah enjoy the AM6 rollercoaster
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 03-07-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 5 of AM 6.0
It's good to see that I'm already on Stage 5 of AM 6.0. Time flies so fast. I remember back when I was still using my first AM sub, I believe it was the 3rd generation. It's been years already. Even though I can feel that I'm still the same guy back then, I believe things have changed for the better. I am one of those stubborn guys that is hard to change but from the looks of it, I did change and it was for the better.
Last night on my very first day of AM 6.0, I experience one of my most vivid dreams while using this AM and I can remember it clearly. I remember wearing a nurse scrub uniform with a number 3 and the text that reads "Laboratory". There was a chief nurse or whatever they called her and she was extremely strict. We are like the nurses for a military group. And yeah I approached her and ask what I am supposed to do. She told me it was my first day in the hospital so I'm supposed to report in the laboratory. There it became quite weird because I saw my colleagues at my current work and even though I tried to hide from them, they still saw me and we had a chat. I told them I'm already a nurse and what not. Then when I reached the elevator that was supposed to take me to the laboratory it took some time before I was able to reach my floor. It felt like I was riding the chair that took Booker DeWitt to Columbia City in Bioshock Infinite. Anyhow, when I reach the laboratory, there were nurses foing lab work and I ask what I should do. They kind of like ignored me until I saw there's a one way mirror and there are doctors interviewing nurses and making fun of her while being interviewed. It was surreal and I feel affected as to why they have to do those things. It came to me that I am lucky to have been accepted in the hospital. Then the dream ended.
(02-28-2016, 10:29 AM)ImFreeman Wrote: Hey JG! good to see you. Are you from Spain, Argentina, Mexico or some other spanish talking country ??..
Regarding your dream yes it definetly is the sub working, you might have some kind of irrational fear of losing that relationship. Of course if that happens it is gonna suck and be painful, but remember that you were OK before that relationship and you are gonna be OK if that ends.
I had similar things happen in my dreams when running AM6, i remember dreading crossing paths with my highschool bully... and during a dream which involved him, i woke up and thought "this is stupid, if i cross him again im going to say this and that and i am going to be alright" and the fear of crossing him was no more. Its like the sub made me reach a solution for the problem in my mind.
So yeah enjoy the AM6 rollercoaster
Hey ImFreeman. I'm not from a Spanish speaking country though from where I'm from, we were once a colony of the Spanish empire.
It's good to see you here. As to what I am writing here, dreams are having a big impact on me currently. Yes, I'm afraid of losing the relationship and also I'm afraid of a ton of other stuff. I do hope I get better at managing them since they are affecting me in my daily life. It's great that you have overcome your fear. It's really hard for me. Sometimes I get emotional and just the thought of it happening makes me cry. Like I fear that my sister will die and so forth.
Goodluck man and thanks for stopping by here.
As an update to my No Fap and No Porn journey, I'm probably around on day 60+ which is great since this is probably my longest streak already ever since I started consistently watching porn. I hope this continues well.
Cheers!
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 03-19-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 5 of AM 6.0
A quick update here. I'm about halfway through the How to become and Alpha Male book by John Alexander. I will finish it before I end this sub.
The relationship that I was talking about kind of ended but the good part is that I am not much affected by it as I expected it to be. The bad thing is that the stress that it caused made me relapsed and I masturbated. So I lost my 70+ day streak of no masturbation. I haven't watched any porn though. However, I did browsed a dating site and imagine having sex with a cute. So I'm resetting my badge in No Fap and No Porn.
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Vincent_Vega - 03-19-2016
Hola Javier my friend!
How is stage 5 going for you? And why did the relationship end? Tell us more!
Regarding the nofap: For me, it's more important to not watch porn instead of never ever masturbate again. I don't do it often, but once a month shouldn't be a big problem (especially when the orgasm is dry).
Oh, and of course: V out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 04-09-2016
JG reporting in!
*On Stage 5 of AM 6.0
Man it's been a while. As always it was a tough time for me lately and I wanted some time for myself. There's not much happening except me pouring my time and effort into my hobbies such as playing the guitar and photography. During the Lenten break I had time to do street photography using my film camera. I had courage to approach a group of students practicing their bartending juggling skills. I was able to ask if its okay to take photos of them while they are practicing. It's a good practice on my part both in photography and self-confidence.
In regards to my pursuit of No Porn and No Fap, I have recently failed. My longest streak was almost two weeks and after that I failed and binge for two straight days. I say to myself never again only to repeat it again after a week or so. It's time to get serious now. Porn needs to be cut off from my life.
(03-19-2016, 02:45 PM)Vincent_Vega Wrote: Hola Javier my friend!
How is stage 5 going for you? And why did the relationship end? Tell us more!
Regarding the nofap: For me, it's more important to not watch porn instead of never ever masturbate again. I don't do it often, but once a month shouldn't be a big problem (especially when the orgasm is dry).
Oh, and of course: V out!
Hello Vincent! It's good to see you here. The problem with me is I'm not noting most of the things I have been experiencing here. I wish I should have. I will try to do better on the 6th stage as I will also finish the How to Become an Alpha Male book by John Alexander.
It's not really a relationship but I'm messaging and going out with this girl. Around the time on my last post, she weren't able to communicate with each other for two weeks so I thought it was already over. I am quick to jump into conclusions in regards to relationships to which I shouldn't. I said to my friends at work who are curious about this new girl that I want to take things slow and I believe she also wants to take it like that as well. During the first week of Easter I am contacted her again and she was glad to hear from me again. We say sorry to each other for not being able to reach out. I said that I am full of drama and quickly jumping into conclusions. As of now she wasn't replying to my messages. The last time I contacted her was about her uncle who recently died. She was the one who made an effort towards helping him because she was a nurse. It's like it was expected by her family. I said my condolences back then and she said thanks. I asked her what's up around a couple of days ago and she didn't messaged back. I feel that she needed time so I probably will message her around next week or tomorrow Sunday.
One thing I learned from this is I shouldn't expect too much. I was always a person who after the first date is already thinking of meeting her parents, what would it be like if we are married and so forth. It's a good thing to dream about having a family but in this case, I should take things as they go. Now, even if she didn't reply it feels okay and even if we don't end up together it feels fine as well. I do make an effort but I am trying to let go of the expectations and the results that I want.
The sub probably helped but I have friends and on the reddit No Fap group we have a support group there who helped me cope up with my struggles in relationships. Sometimes I feel envious of my high school friends who are already on their way to marrying or have already married. I am the only one among them who doesn't have a girlfriend. On the other hand I think about the things I am accomplishing because I have free time like being able to freely travel, spend time on my hobbies such as music and photography and meet different women and new friends.
Thanks for stopping by and I wish you well on your No Porn journey. We all know it is a real struggle. We have smartphones, desktop PCs, tablets that are all tools for watching porn. We can't easily stop using them because they are already a part of our life.
JG out!
RE: JG's Alpha Male 6 Journal - Javier Gerardo - 04-13-2016
JG reporting in!
*Starting Stage 6 of AM 6.0
Time really flows fast and I'm already on my way to Stage 6. A quick journal entry here. Two nights ago I had a dream. This is something noteworthy so I decided to post it here. I dream every night but this just hit me.
It started with a close friend of mine informing me that I got his friend pregnant. I can't remember exactly which among his friends was it exactly. But I was shocked by it. To the point that I tried to recalled during the dream if there was something that happened between me and that girl. I remember that I did drive her back to her house once but I can't remember if we ever did it. I also think that if we indeed had sex, I would have worn a condom but my friend told me that I didn't or else she wouldn't have gotten pregnant. It made me cry during the dream because I can't raise up a child in my current situation nor am I in any way attracted to the girl whom I have gotten pregnant. The dream ended by just me saying I would take responsibility for the child though I am really wondering if I'm really the father. I'm pondering on having a paternity test but that might make me an asshole.
I'm judging that this dream is brought by the sub in a way that my fears come out during my dreams. Anyhow, I was exhausted after the dream and felt kind of relieved that it was only a dream.
There was another noteworthy dream last night but I can't seem to remember it anymore. Moving on, I'm looking forward to posting more of my experiences during this last stage of the sub.
JG out!