Subliminal Talk

Full Version: Is the thrill of success found in the chase? Or in the result?
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Is my motivation to succeed all in the chase, or is it finally acquiring what I've sought? This is a question I considered 10 minutes ago while showing, so I'll explain my reason for asking.

Maybe 10 years back I had a friend who realized painfully....that he was a sex addict. He had a small amount of sexual history in various avenues which I'll not disclose here.

One night I went with him to a men's sexual addiction 12 step meeting. I went since I've had some sexual abuse, and I knew many sex addicts have had some sexual abuse in their backgrounds. I went to find out more about if I was alone or not. I clearly remember one guy, a muscular, image focused guy, who only being in his 20's, taught high school gym. I know nothing of his experiences or preferences, but he said one thing which has stayed with me. Just one thing.

He said he did what he did since he'd liked the thrill of the chase. Sex was always good, but his main motivator was always the chase. Not even a certain type of woman. He loved the rush attained during his chase of women. He'd live on that rush if he had the choice.

Which brings me to why I posted this. I wrote about Develop the Zen Attitude 4G in a post today, and I bought it over a year ago. I've used it 2 or 3 times only. I don't "want" it since.....I own it already. However, I'm on E2, and it has the full script of Positive Thinking, Positive Attitude, which I've really enjoyed. I don't own PTPA in 4G or 5.5G, and being honest, a thrill lies in the waiting and wanting to pick it up. I've picked up some IML subs and used them for little more than hours. For example, I bought USLM last Friday. I could leave it on my computer now since the act of planning and taking it was my (secret) rush. I also own MLS, but have never used it more than a single 4 loop run, maybe 5 separate times. I've honestly thought of MLS more than USLM recently, mostly since with MLS, goals are clear. With USLM, it can be different for every single person due to polymorphic scripting.

I realized the chase is exactly what my motivation is when I join an online business. I'll build up my knowledge to jump in, will do so!!..... And fizzle. I'd done what I came for. There's no pride in admitting that, but there is relief. I've always loved the chase.

I am wondering if this is common. Sex is easy to admit to. But business startups? Relationships? Jobs? Cars? Bank accounts?

And what I'd really like to know is WHY I do this.
Why do you suppose you do it? You already know why. At least part of why, if not all. It's that rush. Dopamine and the other addictive brain chemicals. You found what triggers their release, and you keep doing that to keep triggering their release.

Now is there a psychological reason, beyond having trained yourself to do this to get that rush? I don't know. Might be. But I don't have anywhere near enough information to know.

My girlfriend loves to shop. She has more clothes than infinity, and she's nowhere near finished. She admittedly has very good taste in what she buys, and she wears all of it; but given how much she has, she never needs to shop for clothes ever again. For the rest of her life.

And yet every time we pass certain stores in the mall, even if she is broke as a joke that day, she will go in and browse. If she can't buy something, she gets depressed and leaves. It's because she associates buying things that she likes with pleasure, and very likely that she has the same thing happening. When she is looking for that "perfect piece", she almost certainly gets a shot of the addictive brain chemicals that give her pleasure. The thrill of the hunt.

To answer your original question, the thrill of success isn't what you're after. Success can have it's own thrill. It just depends on which part you get those chemicals from. You get it from hunting.
I reacted badly to your reply originally Shannon. I read a frustrated, overworked man spewing his frustration and powerlessness over his workload, but speaking to the issue I wrote of. I thought "well, f u" I began writing 2ce, but knew I'd just be fueling the fire.

If you're ever in such a mood, just pass on my threads. It's been 2 days, and I still visualize an angry, frustrated Shannon in this thread. I've seen variations of this in some other recent posts of yours, so my assessment can't be that far off.

E2 is the catalyst in all this, and I'm glad I'm using it.
(10-21-2018, 06:59 AM)findingme Wrote: [ -> ]I reacted badly to your reply originally Shannon. I read a frustrated, overworked man spewing his frustration and powerlessness over his workload, but speaking to the issue I wrote of. I thought "well, f u" I began writing 2ce, but knew I'd just be fueling the fire.

If you're ever in such a mood, just pass on my threads. It's been 2 days, and I still visualize an angry, frustrated Shannon in this thread. I've seen variations of this in some other recent posts of yours, so my assessment can't be that far off.

E2 is the catalyst in all this, and I'm glad I'm using it.

Man you are really over-analyzing stuff. Didn't see that at all in Shannon answer, he just stated what he thought on the subject.

My thoughts on it, is that it's different from person to person. It's really up to you to learn to appreciate things on a deeper level. It's easy to get into the "money-game" and start to compete with others, as it gives you a comparison, and thus a meaning (which is ultimately what you look for). Or to turn to sex as an end-game of all things. It also gives meaning, a final destination of your actions in life.

But to find deeper meaning, you need to dive into yourself and find what you appreciate and why. Subs help you to reflect upon those things (at least i think they do), and you can use meditation as a tool to understand yourself better.

A business owner who is driven purely by the thrill, will probably make a lot of bad decisions, as that kind of motivator would need to be controlled by will-power, and some days when that wouldn't be there, he/she would make decisions out of the thrill-seeking, not being thought trough.

It's better to find the deeper meanings as in helping other people, create a long-term sustainable system for your economy, discover new things, etc.

In relationships, try to learn how to be present with yourself in the relationship and give your love/wisdom to other people, build strong friendships based on trust.

In personal development, learn how to get in contact with yourself, find your favourite music and learn to enjoy it more and more.

Life is a journey of discovery if you let it be. Let that voice that may be silent now take more place, learn to listen to it and learn yourself be guided with it, and you will find meaning.

Two books that have given me some insight into deeper meanings of life is:
Miracle in the andes - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4542..._the_Andes

Mans search for meaning -
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4069...or_Meaning

If the case is that you have problem to digest thing you think/read/hear from other people - and that is causing you to get the feeling of lack of meaning I would really recommend you to start looking into meditation.

Good luck! People have been in your place before and there is good ways to get to a more meaningful one.
You know the chaze stuff u are talking about.. I also have that issue.. and I wanna solve this lack of motivation I am having and TBH I think UMOP is helping me alot but not in they way I thought it would.. Seems like UMOP is making me do stuff (finding new ways to earn money).. At first I denied it and thought that should make money in a specific way.. Like i wanted to control it... But it turns out i was so wrong..

I think UMOP can help but I can't say for sure...
I'd rather have the result. Chasing things is time consuming.
(10-21-2018, 06:59 AM)findingme Wrote: [ -> ]I reacted badly to your reply originally Shannon. I read a frustrated, overworked man spewing his frustration and powerlessness over his workload, but speaking to the issue I wrote of. I thought "well, f u" I began writing 2ce, but knew I'd just be fueling the fire.

If you're ever in such a mood, just pass on my threads. It's been 2 days, and I still visualize an angry, frustrated Shannon in this thread. I've seen variations of this in some other recent posts of yours, so my assessment can't be that far off.

E2 is the catalyst in all this, and I'm glad I'm using it.

I have no idea how you got any of that out of what I said, but okay. Not my problem. I'll just try to remember to take a pass on you next time I have the urge to help.
I understand what you meant findingme. It can sometimes be difficult to discern the tone someone is trying to convey with their message when you're talking over text. Things just sound more serious than they actually are. That's why I use emoji's. To the observer, Shannon's post is no big deal, he talks like that all the time. It's normal. But the receiver can take it hard sometimes.

For example, the response I got after I made an assumption about Shannon's work on my journal shook me up for a day or two. That's because I have a lot of respect for Shannon and getting shut down like that by someone you respect can be difficult to handle. Reading it over now I see that it wasn't really a big deal, and I learned how to handle something like this in the future. Thanks USLM lol
Thanks for bringing that up Hatman. I have been really reactive in anger lately. Out of fear of consequences and also imagined opinions of others, I've buried anger all my life. E2 is opening up some self care in me, and anger has surfaced quickly lately.

However, something I'm just starting to notice is me projecting my feelings on others. When I first read Shannon's reply, I was at work, frustrated by not having stood up for myself that day. When I read Shannon's words, I put my voice in his words, and I read Shannon as angry, frustrated, and helpless over his work situation--the very things I was feeling. Well, I projected everything I felt onto Shannon, and I got mad. I managed to make him the bad guy, thus causing me problems.

I'm not sure how to make amends presently, as I've been blowing off others too. This isn't a pity cry, but I am in a new area, which is owning my anger.
When I first read your reply, I had been having a very bad day, and I lost it. I waited a very long time to respond. At the time, I was driving and I could not re-read my own reply to make sure I had not inadvertently said something inappropriate. When I got home, and had calmed down enough, I saw that Greenduck seemed to believe my reply was not inappropriate. I read it again, and I did not see anything that made sense for that. So I left it alone for a few more days. Then I replied.

If you're going through some shit, I can understand that. No hard feelings. We'll call it water under the bridge.
Thank you Shannon. Shy