Subliminal Talk

Day 10 - Only day ten. It feels like it's been at least twice that. Took the advice of @findingme and played the masked version of E2 while I slept last night. Believe it or not I went to bed way earlier than I thought I would. I wanted to get listening time in as well as I was getting tired. It says a lot when I shut off NHL playoff hockey to get sleep. I want to start the work week off the best way possible. Not go in to work groggy . That said today my motivation is lacking. To the complete opposite of what I said yesterday giving what is being demanded of me for the foreseeable future it was a struggle to not say f*** it & switch to AM6. I am reminding myself constantly that what I'm feeling is most likely resistance talking & that if I want to get the results with AM6 that I would like , I need to be patient & do the time with E2.
I had a talk with my wife yesterday about starting the 2nd job & how it feels like a step backwards. In stark contrast to any previous experience we talked about how when mistakes were made before that put us in a bad situation that now we are planning & making adjustments where needed. I know one huge sign of immaturity that I need to work on & resolve is knowing that there are times I have to do things either for the short or long term that I may not want to. That right there is probably the biggest way I have sabotaged myself in the past. That I know is tied in a lot of ways to my fear of missing out . I have been reading up on the traits & characteristics of an emotionally mature man & the willingness to do what needs to be done is part of that. I know that this is also addressed in AM6 which I a big reason why I've been thinking of switching to that.

Day 10 update - I forgot to mention that I had dreams last night related to issues I'm working on resolving with E2. As to what the dream was I don't remember at this time. Makes me curious if that happened because I switched from ultrasonic to the masked version? I've spent part of the morning reading other E2 journals. Not to compare myself to anyone but to see how E2 has impacted others & how long they ran it. I talk about wanting to switch to AM6 & then I read where someone has run E2 for a year or eighteen months & I remind myself to do everything I can to be patient & let E2 do it's job

I stressed myself out too thinking "I can be as good as THEM". When I thought like that, it was all fear-based thinking. Fear was all I'd ever used, and mostly, it (kind of) worked.

Since the journals have such variance, would you consider choosing a doable goal for yourself? Say 3 months? Or 6 months? You'll change consistently during this time, and in my experience, I began to ENJOY the change. Waking up and feeling good, like I'm not who I was yesterday, is progress in my book.

Because the "ALL or NOTHING!" crowd.........have never been in my own backyard :-). And they'll never be.

(05-14-2018, 06:07 AM)findingme Wrote: [ -> ]I stressed myself out too thinking "I can be as good as THEM". When I thought like that, it was all fear-based thinking. Fear was all I'd ever used, and mostly, it (kind of) worked.

Since the journals have such variance, would you consider choosing a doable goal for yourself? Say 3 months? Or 6 months? You'll change consistently during this time, and in my experience, I began to ENJOY the change. Waking up and feeling good, like I'm not who I was yesterday, is progress in my book.

Because the "ALL or NOTHING!" crowd.........have never been in my own backyard :-). And they'll never be.

I get it. As much as I don't want to admit it I am going to continue running E2 without an ending time frame. I will elaborate more later