You didn't do AM2011 before you did SM? If thats so, I'm curious how's that working out for ya?
Day 38,
Yesterday night, I went clubbing by myself in this city and I felt not well because the place was SO crowded that you couldn't stand your space, without being pushed and I'm not that tall, so my presence is just gone. I hate when it's that crowded.
The only place you could own your own space was at the bar in the middle of the club. I talked with a guy, telling me that I was standing at his space, where his smoke was and he offered me some.
I didn't socialize that night much but I was trying to have fun by myself.
At a point I look over to the other side of the bar and I lock eyes with a cute brunette, I smile slyly and she gives a big smile back. It lasted about 4-5 seconds before I broke it.
Later a girl touched my back and I turned a little and she asked for a cigarette, knowing that I had smoked but I knew I didn't have many left as I found them somewhere in the club, so I said no. So she asked the guy besides me.
BUT I realized it first after, that it was that girl, which I have had eye-contact with
I was doubting myself but I didn't want to doubt myself. I felt like I had a small battle inside me, which was affecting my energy.
Changes I see right now;
* I catch women much more looking at me
* Women are trying to qualify themselves to me more
* I walk and stand more confidently and more sexy (I'm doing this consciously)
* Sometimes, I often have to remind myself of being in the moment, when I'm in doubt but the change has somehow made me more aware of it
- LM
