Subliminal Talk

(11-24-2013, 11:05 AM)AlphaScorpio Wrote: [ -> ]Wow, this really opened my eyes. I have been in victim mentality for too long. that makes sense why these certain types of people seem to keep popping into my life. My friend ed would bully me by humiliating me with the ED scenario. my other friend would bully me by making me feel unworthy about my opinions or what I think from time to time. My mum bullies me by criticising my desires causing me to feel unworthy. My other friend has bullied me by toying with my emotions. This isn't saying that all my friends are bullies cause it's not like that in all aspects of my relationship with them but it's obviously something that's hindering me from developing self respect and then seeing that manifest in the outside world with more supportive people in my life.

Dude, I gotta speak up here:

Even that realization is riddled with the victim mentality. Instead of seeing it as "my friends bully me", look at it like this "I invite bullying behavior with something I do or beliefs that I hold."

Then, when you try to figure out what that is, you can change it, and I guaruntee you the bullying behavior will stop.

To show how this is true, I offer a story of my own:

About a year ago (before subs, and in the first or second month with my coach), I was at work with a guy from our crew who is very charismatic but also a bully. Anyhow, I showed up to work one day and he comes over to my car. I roll-down the window and he tells me how I'm going to drive the company van to the site. Well, I didn't feel comfortable because it was winter, so I told him, and he started saying things like "Don't give me that. You're going to do it!"

Anyhow, I stayed firm and then he starts poking me on my arm. I retaliate with poking on his arm and say "Don't poke me!"

Well, of course, retaliation never works, and he just poked me more. So, realizing my mistake to follow his lead and try to fight fire with fire, I then just rolled up my window until he HAD to pull his hand out to keep from it getting squished.

Anyhow, I stayed in my car for a bit longer, then he comes back after 10 minutes.

I roll down the window, expecting him to have smartened up.

Well he did, he says to me (in a very respectful tone)

"So, I'm going to get the new kid to drive the van, did you want to get the tools out while we're gone?"

I'm like "Sure."

"Ok, thanks."

Never was bullied again.

Hope that helps.

Remember: You can't control other people, but you CAN control yourself, and most of the time if you are getting certain results, it's directly because of what YOU are doing. This is called Taking Responsibility.

As always K-Train I appreciate your honesty, it does not offend me at all it instead makes me uncomfortable or tends to at first put me in a state of denial. But in a positive way that helps me see my life more clearly, for what it is. I have realized a few things;

1. The reason why I didn't feel AM5 did anything was not because of the program not working or speakers or headphones not being good enough (cause they were) or exposure time etc. It's because I can remember not wanting to get out the comfort zone. I didn't want to rock the boat and I spent SO much energy subconsciously RESISTING and trying everything NOT to create change that could upset me or other people. Hence some depression and feelings of boredom and frustration. It was FEAR that held me back. Damn that really makes sense. Funny I remember consciously thinking "Sure I'd do anything to be alpha and self respected" My subconscious begged to differ.

2.(I've had an underlying sense of this one for a while) My "Friends" are actually people I've known for 4+ years that I depend on and vice versa who I share common issues/beliefs with. Sure I still like them and enjoy hanging round with them, but they don't give me support, very selfish relationships. I hate saying this, but it's mostly true. Whilst I do believe there were moments of genuine true PURE friendship and relationship, most of it has been a mixture of egos.

Again, I really do appreciate your sincere advice, that's real and I can really respect that. I wish I had more people around me who were sincere and honest. You seem to understand where I'm coming from K-train, have you worked through a similar experience previously in your life or maybe you are just very perceptive?

I'm usually a resistant person, I don't like getting told what to do or what to believe, but I'm 100% adamant that I know real when I see it. That's why I'm tired of fake ass people that I seem to encounter a lot. Of course I can't hold a grudge, we're all selfish to some degree for me it's just about seeing it for what it is and moving on to create what I want. Thanks for the inspiration!

Today I went to meet a friend to have a chat over a pint since I didn't see him much over the weekend. After the realisation that it's okay to be angry and moody without putting on a sweet outer image i found myself acting more centered and secure. Went to the shop to get some fags and I felt totally crap and angry i asked for some fags and noticed the guy behind the till was acting with respect more than usual. didn't even ask me for ID which they usually would in this kind of shop. I felt no shame in showing people who are complete strangers that I was angry. what a refreshing feeling. When I met my friend i wasn't ashamed to show and tell him why i was annoyed with parents and other things throughout the time we were with each other and he seemed to be more understanding, empathetic and wasn't trying to push my buttons like he would ve done previously. I'm glad this happened. I've learned that it's okay to show people how you feel and ill remember this in future. awesome.

(11-24-2013, 03:10 PM)AlphaScorpio Wrote: [ -> ]Today I went to meet a friend to have a chat over a pint since I didn't see him much over the weekend. After the realisation that it's okay to be angry and moody without putting on a sweet outer image i found myself acting more centered and secure. Went to the shop to get some fags and I felt totally crap and angry i asked for some fags and noticed the guy behind the till was acting with respect more than usual. didn't even ask me for ID which they usually would in this kind of shop. I felt no shame in showing people who are complete strangers that I was angry. what a refreshing feeling. When I met my friend i wasn't ashamed to show and tell him why i was annoyed with parents and other things throughout the time we were with each other and he seemed to be more understanding, empathetic and wasn't trying to push my buttons like he would ve done previously. I'm glad this happened. I've learned that it's okay to show people how you feel and ill remember this in future. awesome.

This is the awesomest post I read today. Sounds like a transformative experience.

(11-24-2013, 12:15 PM)AlphaScorpio Wrote: [ -> ]As always K-Train I appreciate your honesty, it does not offend me at all it instead makes me uncomfortable or tends to at first put me in a state of denial. But in a positive way that helps me see my life more clearly, for what it is. I have realized a few things;

1. The reason why I didn't feel AM5 did anything was not because of the program not working or speakers or headphones not being good enough (cause they were) or exposure time etc. It's because I can remember not wanting to get out the comfort zone. I didn't want to rock the boat and I spent SO much energy subconsciously RESISTING and trying everything NOT to create change that could upset me or other people. Hence some depression and feelings of boredom and frustration. It was FEAR that held me back. Damn that really makes sense. Funny I remember consciously thinking "Sure I'd do anything to be alpha and self respected" My subconscious begged to differ.

2.(I've had an underlying sense of this one for a while) My "Friends" are actually people I've known for 4+ years that I depend on and vice versa who I share common issues/beliefs with. Sure I still like them and enjoy hanging round with them, but they don't give me support, very selfish relationships. I hate saying this, but it's mostly true. Whilst I do believe there were moments of genuine true PURE friendship and relationship, most of it has been a mixture of egos.

Again, I really do appreciate your sincere advice, that's real and I can really respect that. I wish I had more people around me who were sincere and honest. You seem to understand where I'm coming from K-train, have you worked through a similar experience previously in your life or maybe you are just very perceptive?

I'm usually a resistant person, I don't like getting told what to do or what to believe, but I'm 100% adamant that I know real when I see it. That's why I'm tired of fake ass people that I seem to encounter a lot. Of course I can't hold a grudge, we're all selfish to some degree for me it's just about seeing it for what it is and moving on to create what I want. Thanks for the inspiration!

No problem bro. I'm not perfect either, but I've been in a similar boat. Me, myself personally, I had friends that weren't looking for the same things in life i was but I kept them around because we'd known each other since middle school. I joined some organizations around my campus and ran AM2011 and noticed that my social circle began changing. You gotta be willing to cut ties with the riff raff. Once people start seeing you growing, changing, and being successful they typically have two choices 1) accept it and congratulate you or 2) hate on you and/or be indifferent towards your accomplishments. If it's the latter, then that only proves you don't need to be around them anymore.

I think for you the sticking point is that you've been chums with these dudes for so long that you feel comfortable with them even though you're not happy. It's like how some people stay in abusive relationships simply because its more convenient to stay put. Eventually, as your self confidence and self respect increases, you'll naturally move away from them anyway unless they change how they treat you. That's how it happened for me, and I can almost guarantee that others here on the forum can attest that it happened to/for them as well.

One other thing, find reasons to stay at school more. Find an organization or just try to perfect your grades. It sounds like home is a bit too toxic right now and you would be better served by limiting the time you're there. Just a thought.

I'm really hoping Shannon finishes up AM6.0 soon because I'm really anxious to see how it affects you.

I can definitely see how cutting ties with some people helps you grow, I have cut down seeing my old friend ed, who used to laugh and poke fun about my ED with that girl. I don't see him anymore, talk to him on facebook every now and then, but I feel better for it. He was definitely a toxic person.

I'd like to be out more, you know the thing that really pisses me off and confuses me? It's that when I go out for a long time usually to see friends and I go out over a period of a few days, sometimes I spend the whole weekend over seeing friends and hardly see my family they suddenly get pissy, especially my mum she starts saying how I'm never around and I reject the family etc. but when I am at home all I get is shit, and all they get is shit so what's the deal with that? what exactly are you missing by me staying out of this nasty environment?

You're damn right home is toxic, I'm starting to see things differently, It's amazing how much shame and fear distorts your perception of reality, I just got told "What do you thinks gonna happen when you read that book" (No more mr. nice guy) by my sister in a provocative undertone. I replying with I'm not sure exactly, Hopefully I'll be able to get rid of some unhealthy behaviors. Mum then said YOUR PERCEPTION IS ODD BLAH BLAH BLAH. I was thinking wow, if my perception was odd I'd still be believing everything that came out of your mouth.

I had a thought yesterday about parents. They bring you up, raise you and look after you (in healthy families at least) but they basically teach you to be just like them, in my case it was "Being nice and pleasant to everyone, respect women" "Don't do drugs or smoke or watch porn these are all very bad for you" "Read the bible" "Don't have sex before marriage" etc. etc. I used to hear my parents say countless times "We love you just who you are Dan" well I found that when you stop conforming and stop wanting to be like them and start challenging them on their opinions and ideas, they suddenly seem to loose that "We love you just who you are" vibe and get angry. The ironic thing is, my dad says he wants me to be mature and independent, I ask him to put all my birthday money that I was given into my online bank account because its mine and I'm allowed to do whatever I'd like with it. He then suddenly moans and starts patronizing me about wasting money? lol how can I be independent if I'm dependent on you for telling me what to spend my money on?

anyways, I didn't get so bottled up after the argument, I did get angry but I don't feel too angry now,just reflecting.

I am pretty damn excited for AM6 but I'm going to approach it in a more patient way this time, I'm also going to take into consideration the negative emotions that I experience and put them into practice with my new found courage!

I'm gonna take the dog out for a walk laters!

Had a pretty interesting experience with NG, started off with super halo and I very quickly got into a state I can describe as being totally "in acceptance" of the women in the video. I've kinda realized what NG is about, It's about not desiring women to fill the hole in your soul it's about accepting their energy and being almost selfless I felt pretty damn good when I experienced this, got SO much energy built in my body felt like I was going to throw it up lol. Legs and feet were rock solid on the ground. I also noticed I focused less on the song and more on the moves of the girls in the video. I experienced some crazy euphoria for a really short time as well (3 seconds), I could feel it coming. Interestingly enough though when I got to the 4th video I started getting the frustration/boredom I sometimes get, the positive stuff lessened. I carried on watching but maybe this is because my energy only needs a certain amount on NG or something? weird. I feel like I've definately had enough NG for the day lol. definately.

I think we should start seeing the subliminals or whatevet self-help tools ad TOOLS like a hammer. YOU must grab the hammer. YOU must be the one to pick up and use it. It won't use itself. I now see all self-help tool as assistants and I do the heavylifting like Geodude does

Sure, I get what you're saying, what inspired you to say this?

I don't even remember honestly . I think it wasbthe post all above an it does really apply to my life too.

Your NG sessions are interesting. I've never felt like that during NG but I only once experienced this but not that results. I'll do some more NG and see what develops.

Yeh I do occasionally have these great sessions I find the more I let go and stop caring the more into it I get, but it feels like it happens spontaneously. I still don't see many results with women in terms of attraction or stuff... I did have some increased attention from some girls yesterday though so perhaps...

Had a weird day at college, got there and I was all energetic and sociable etc. then I started getting socially anxious and went to the toilets to do some tapping on it... Couldn't get rid of the feeling of being closed off to other people and in inner turmoil with some tension. I tried tapping for ages on different things that I felt triggered my social anxiety/boredom/depression but nothing seemed to change my state that drastically... I played table tennis with alot of different people I find it easier to socialize when I can do something active like table tennis, pool etc. etc.

I talked to this girl who bought me a coke and asked her if she wanted to come outside, we sat on a bench talking, still found it kinda hard to really open up and be confident around her... Annoying stuff gonna do some more tapping on it in a minute. Still in dismay that ASC doesn't seem to be creating many results or me letting it, wish I could get to the root of why I resist and then tap on it...

did some tapping on resistance to absolute self confidence sub saying stuff like I release the fear of change feelings of loosing control and did the quick tap as well. I felt some release and yes my feelings of frustration with the lack of results pretty much went away. hard to tell if this will make difference with my experience with subliminals i might try to do this daily alongside asc and see what happens.